So last night I woke up in the middle of the night and I had a really great idea for a blog. It was going to be really cool too. And I told myself I should get up and write the idea down so I didn't forget it. But then I figured it was so good, I'd never forget.
Of course, I have no clue what the idea was now. I lost it completely. But it keeps bugging me because I feel like it was important. I'm sure it wasn't though. The things I think are awesome at 3am are probably nowhere near as amazing in the light of day.
And now that I'm actually awake and not dreaming of blog topics, I can't think of a single thing of interest to say. I finally have some time to blog and I've got nothing. Isn't that how it always is? Of course, not many people are around this place on a Saturday anyway. So even if I remembered my amazing topic, no one would probably read it anyway.
But right now, Nat is off at the grocery store, and I opted to stay home. It's cold outside. Well, not cold by normal people standards, but southern California cold. We're wimps. And I hear it's supposed to rain tomorrow too. Whenever that happens, I never want to go anywhere. Does anyone else ever feel like that? When it's raining, I'd much rather just stay inside and lay on the couch or something.
Just so you know, this post has no direction or purpose. It's me rambling. Sometimes I like to write, just to have something to do. Even if it makes no sense. Sorry. But here are some my ramblings anyway.
Last night, I was sitting on the floor in the living room. And we have this big ottoman that our big dumb cat likes to sleep on. And that's where she was. Sound asleep. And I was sitting next to the ottoman, just watching TV. Minding my own business. When the cat wakes up, looks over at me, and smacks me on the top of my head for no reason!
I think maybe she had a bad dream about me and when she saw me sitting there, she wanted to smack the shit out me. It hurt too. Her claws were out! And she's about 20 pounds with paws like a bobcat. It was a pretty forceful smack to the head. And Natalie immediately started laughing and couldn't stop. Neither could I. It was hilarious, even if it did hurt.
I'm telling you that our cats hate me for some reason. Last weekend, Misty assaulted my nuts, and now Miss Fluff wants to scramble my brain. I'd hate to see what the other two are going to come up with later. I saw them conspiring against me by the food bowl. I better watch my back.
In other news, my insomnia is improving. Now I'm just waking up at 5am every morning. But see, that's alright because my body still hasn't adjusted to the time change. My old internal alarm would always wake me up at 6am because that's when I get up for work. So this makes a little sense anyway. But I still wish I could sleep longer.
Oh, I've got a slightly funny story. I forgot about this until now. But earlier in the week, I had a doctors appointment. (I did mention the sleep problem, by the way, but I didn't get anything for it.) Anyway, I had the appointment and the nurse called me back to the room. And I had a jacket with me that I had taken off because the waiting room was stifling. So it was over my arm instead.
And the nurse looks at me and smiles and asks me, "would you like me to hang your purse up for you?" What? My purse? I just stared at her for a moment and said nothing. And she gave me this weird look like, "what?" So I asked her, "my purse?" She turned beet red and was like, "oh my God...did I say purse? I meant your jacket!"
Apparently she was daydreaming about purses and had no idea the words that came out of her mouth. It was really funny. Even if she did feel like a total moron. I seem to have a strange effect on nurses though. I render them stupid. I wonder how that happens? Maybe I'm unsafe in a medical setting? I'm just glad I don't render the doctors stupid too or it could be dangerous.
-evil_twin LA
evil_twin posted on Nov 10, 2007
| views: 810
Comments
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Twylarants said on Nov 10, 2007....
God, ET, you're way too young to be forgetting things already! And I'm sure it won't make you feel better to know I do that very same thing..."I'll remember that when I wake up, all I have to do is think of (some word) and that'll remind me". Yeah, right. I can't even remember that I wanted to remember something! But I'm 58 and you're...what...25 or something?
We had 3 cats when my kids were young, (they were always bringing kittens home...I think they stole them from the mama cats.)
One just hated me. Loved my husband, hated me. I mean really loved my husband!
She would stretch herself alongside him when he went to bed, and when I tried to get in the bed she'd stick all four legs out, claws at the ready, as if to say "Get away from him! He's mine!"
When I fed them the other 2 would wind themselves around my legs, purring and kissing up to me the way cats do when they hear the can opener. This one would creep into the kitchen, hugging the wall as though I was gonna kick her or something! And if I spoke to her, she would groom herself furiously until I shut up.
I asked the vet about it, thinking I'd get a medical explanation...he said "Well..." (and I swear this is true!) "your voice is a little ...annoying."
I payed $35 to hear that.
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hinana said on Nov 10, 2007....
i actually kind of like the rain, as long as i dont get wet and/or cold, but then where i live u kind of HAVE to start likign rain or youll spend half you years grumbling about the weather xD
your cats sound awesome..ive always wanted one but noo my moms 'allergic'
and twyly that is funnyyy..i doubt your voice is that annoying =)
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secretlife said on Nov 10, 2007....
i was driving the other day and this really great idea for a post came to me.for 45 minutes i composed and edited it in my head.i got home and immediately had to take a conference call that lasted 2 hours.by then it was supper time and i had to make something or risk a houseful of hungry cranky people......i sat down that night, and for the LIFE OF ME couldn't remember this brilliant idea i had on the drive home....it still hasn't come back to me.i hate when that happens! -
the_infernal_optimist said on Nov 10, 2007....
Ok, Miss Fluff made me laugh. :-D Cats are so darned weird sometimes!
I'm glad the insomnia is getting better. :)
~Infernal
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Mr_Box said on Nov 10, 2007....
Your cats are going to kill you, dude. Our cat likes to trip me. I swear she does it on purpose too.
She can be sleeping and she waits for me to get up, then suddenly she's right under my feet trying to sabatoge my efforts to walk.
That's funny about the nurse asking to hang up your purse. I can just imagine the look you gave her.
Was she crushing on you or the purse she was dreaming about? One wonders.
I'm glad you're sleeping better. But I still think you should have gotten a prescription....
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evil_twin said on Nov 10, 2007....
twyla--I don't usually forget stuff! But when the ideas come to you in the middle of the night, and you're half asleep, it happens. I'm 28, by the way. I had to laugh about the vet saying your voice was annoying! I'm sure it's not. I think cats are just very moody creatures.
hinana--I don't mind the rain as long as I don't have to go outside in it. It's nice to cuddle up on the couch or in bed and listen to the rain outside. But just don't ask me to run around in it!
secret--You can understand my frustration, then. I still haven't remembered what I was going to write about either. I just know it was something good. I need to keep some paper and a pen by my bedside from now on! It reminds of an episode of Seinfeld where Jerry had a great joke idea in the middle of night and he wrote it down. But then he couldn't read his writing! That would probably happen to me too.
infernal--Cats are crazy. But I guess that's why I like them so much. I'm glad the insomnia is better too. I'd give anything to sleep normally again!
Mr. Box--Long time, no see. I guess I should have gotten a prescription for my sleep issues, but I hate taking that stuff. I don't want to start sleepwalking and driving to the store in my sleep. That freaks me out. I have no idea if the nurse liked me, or she'd just finished eyeing a cool purse on Ebay. I didn't ask!
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tbs230 said on Nov 10, 2007....
hmmm, maybe your cats are trying to tell you something? (Don't ask me what, I have no idea)...
That post thing? Happens to me ALL the time, I could literally think something up, while I'm at the computer...by the time I get onto SC, it's gone...completely, and then I'm just like Bleh!
And my mom is the same about the rain...in fact, she stood me up yesterday because the TV said it was going to rain. But she made me come home instead...ain't that some shit? She doesn't want to go out because it's raining...but I should still come home...IN THE RAIN! Sometimes...
Anyway...loved that the nurse thought your jacket was a purse.
Twylarants: I brought my turtles to the vet because they got injured...he took a look at them, poked them, asked me what happened...and then told me they were going to die, and gave me some pain medication.
I was charged $384, so he could tell me they were going to die. Do you know how much my babies cost? $12...sometimes...
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evil_twin said on Nov 10, 2007....
tbs--I sure hope my cats are not trying to tell me something! Because if they are, it must be bad. I think lots of us have come up with brilliant post ideas, only to lose them forever in the recesses of our brains. It sucks. Maybe your mom figured you didn't mind the rain? -
tbs230 said on Nov 10, 2007....
lol, I doubt it even crossed her mind that it would rain on me. My mom just doesn't think like that.
Your cats could just be telling you that their upset with you about something. Or maybe they see something in your aura that they're trying to get rid of...you never know, and cats can see more than people. (Sorry if I'm getting spooky, I don't mean to!) Either way, I hope they're not too!
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botoni said on Nov 10, 2007....
First point is: Where is the video of Miss Fluff doing her batting? Second point is: Did Nats' dad have the same nurse just before and was carrying his man purse? -
queenparanoia said on Nov 10, 2007....
okay i had a very shitty day yet your post make me smile... thanks for that kyle... by the way your cats are funny... =) -
hotaka said on Nov 11, 2007....
Sometimes I dream something that strikes me as being something that is definately worth posting about. I wake up and think, "That was so cool. What an awesome short story. I'll have to blog about it." But later I can hardly remember it and what I can remember seems banal and not worth the excitement I felt in the middle of the night.
Cats sure can be fun. You gotta wonder what is going on in their heads.
It's a rainy day today and I have a mild cold. K is out with her parents and nephew so I am sitting in the school office doing some mailbox clean-up and task catch-up. I will try to get around to posting about my big news.
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lfbno7 said on Nov 11, 2007....
That was pretty funny. -
quietone said on Nov 11, 2007....
E. T. my dear, maybe that cat of yours should bat you again...wasnt or isn't nat a "nurse"or at least at one time? and you said that nurses are stupid? duh...LOL you better get your purse and take her out to dinner if thats the case! -
silverwhisper said on Nov 11, 2007....
you know, i read the description and thought to myself, "hey, it's a seinfeld blog!" :>
you know, i think i've forgotten a lot of blog entries, but my memory's legendarily bad so i suppose that's to be expected. :>
ed -
evil_twin said on Nov 11, 2007....
tbs--Your comment about the cats seeing my aura was really interesting. You have no idea how interesting. It definitely gives me something to think about.
botoni--Unfortunately there is no video of Miss Fluff attacking me, but that would have been funny! And I swear I didn't have a man purse with me at the doctors office, but it's possible Nat's dad was there! :-P
queen--I'm glad that my post could make you happy :-)
hotaka--I've done that before too where I think of something really great, but I lose parts of it, and suddenly it's just no where near as interesting as I thought it would be. By the way, I read your big news. Someone's gonna be calling you Daddy soon! (Not me though, cause that's just weird.) Congrats!
lfbno--I'm glad you thought so. I try.
quietone--Now in my defense I did not say nurses were stupid. I said I rendered them stupid in my presence. Nat will attest to this! After all, she put the stethoscope on the wrong side of my chest when we met. And now this nurse was asking to hang up my purse! I think I scramble their brains....
silver--I guess everyone forgets the so called brilliant ideas we have, from time to time. And this was a bit of Seinfeld-esque blog. It's about nothing. And there's your blog. And people still read it! I think it's gonna be a hit :-P
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Mr_Box said on Nov 11, 2007....
I took Ambien before and I didn't sleep walk. Or if I did, no one noticed and I don't remember.
I guess that means I didn't prepare a five course dinner or drive to McDonalds in my sleep.
They have other pills though. Just keep them in mind because sleep deprivation will drive you crazy. And let's face it dude. You're already halfway there.
Just kidding. You know I love ya.
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evil_twin said on Nov 11, 2007....
Mr. Box--I am already halfway there. Sleep deprivation just makes me loopy on top of the crazy. But last night was much better. I slept all night without waking up once. And then I got up at 6am. Woo-hoo! Progress. And without pills too. -
uniquely-ironic said on Nov 11, 2007....
So, the cats have plans for you. You're toast. Everyone knows that cats are the sneakiest most determined animals in the world. I'll miss you. (kidding)
I like staying home when it's yucky outside. (cold or wet) The only exception is if there's a bookstore trip, then I'm leading the way to the car.
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nursecutie said on Nov 11, 2007....
Awww....you do render nurses stupid sometimes! LOL I think it's your dangerous charm......... ;)
I think it's funny that she asked you to hang up your purse! I couldn't help but think of my dad when I heard that. Maybe some other guy had a man purse and she couldn't stop thinking about it?! LOL
The cats still love you though. Miss Fluff likes you. She just gets bitchy sometimes. She probably has a hairball! She loves to have her tummy snuggled and petted but if she's in a mood, she will hiss at me and slap my hand away! You just never know what you are going to get.........
I'm soooo happy you're sleeping better though. You always used to wake up earlier than me, but not this early!! I think it's all getting better now though :) If it doesn't you should try Lunesta instead of Ambien. I hear that's better.........
xxoo natalie xxoo
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CreativeWoman said on Nov 11, 2007....
evil twin,
Most of my blog posts are rambles these days. Join the club. (just kidding) I always enjoy reading yours. That's really funny about the cat.
CW
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gingersoul said on Nov 11, 2007....
Kyle.....this story tells me that:
1) you and nurses are just hot item. Suggestion to Nat...dont ever, ever let him go to the doctors alone......seriously...
2) your cat rocks! I am still laughing .......i have a cat named Bruce (because of the mitic Springsteen) but i had to leave home behind when i moved here...my mom got him.......i swear.......he used to wait for me to enter in the room and jump on my legs and grab my ankles........luckily he had been declawed by his previous owner...otherwise.....oh, and he loved walking on the walls......literally......lol....
Suggestion to you: take Lunesta.....a friend of mine swear on it and she is usign it by months now...
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amyispretty said on Nov 12, 2007....
LMAO @ the cat slapping you. I had these cats named captain and morgan, (stupid names, i know.) They were brother and sister. Every once in awhile, captain would walk up to morgan and slap her across the face for no reason. I would lmao. -
crybabylu said on Nov 12, 2007....
are you sure you didn't have a purse under your jacket? Ha!.
Comment on "A blog about nothing...but some of it's funny"
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