Okay, these are just the first 30 over a two hundred possible ways to annoy someone. If you are not in the mood to do so, just read and you might have some laughs from it.
- Specify that your drive-thru order is “to go.”
- If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
- Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will “swipe your grub.”
- Name your dog “Dog.”
- Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions “to keep them tuned up.”
- Reply to everything someone says with “that’s what you think.”
- Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your “astronaut training.”
- Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.
- Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
- Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you’ll be saying more any moment.
- Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you “like it that way.”
- Tell 1-800 operators they sound gay and ask for a date.
- Sew anti-theft detector strips into people’s backpacks.
- Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
- Order a side of pork rinds with your fillet mignon.
- Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.
- Tape pieces of “Sweating to the Oldies” over climatic parts of rental movies.
- Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.
- Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
- Repeat everything someone says as a question.
- Write “X - BURIED TREASURE” in random spots on all of someone’s road maps.
- Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination, UFO, and OJ Simpson conspiracy theories.
- Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: “Do you hear that?”, “What?”, “Never mind, it’s gone now.”
- Light road flares on a birthday cake.
- Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
- At the Laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
- Stand over someone’s shoulder, mumbling as they read.
- Ask people what gender they are.
- Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.
- While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
More of the funny stuffs, here! (Good for the bored, slacker, fast employee / people )
