The question arose in another post about how my husband and i would feel after having sex with others.
We do wonder how we will feel during and afterwards. I guess there is no way to know really, until you get there.
If he watches me have sex with someone else, how will he feel, how will i feel. Can you make a person stop if he is fucking away and say hubby decides he doesnt like it? or if I decide I dont like it.
Too late then I suppose.
I am sure I will be nervous and probably have great difficulty having an orgasm that first time. Ive never knowingly had an audience lol. But that first time will be interesting.
And the how he will feel about sex with me afterwards, and how i will feel about that is another great question.
I am not sure there is any way to know before hand. Im sure we will talk that out.
From
what I have read , most problems arrive when one partner doesnt really
want to do it , but is doing it for the other, or is doing it under
duress. We know that is not the case here.
It does seem interesting - this turn of events - that as we have talked more, it is my husband who has introduced the idea of watching me with another man. Maybe he was waiting for a good time to tell me and found it. Maybe he senses that I have already had sex with others, even though he said he didnt want to know and i have not told him.
We do trust each other a lot. I believe that even if
we are both very upset and miserable after ... that we will call it a
lesson learned and move on.
the question becomes .. is the risk worth the reward.
I do honestly believe that our trust and love for each other will overcome even if it is a disaster.
I
can say that I felt better about myself and more confident after my
little indiscretion. I also enjoyed it with my husband just a little
bit more...
So hopefully that trend will repeat itself.
Before my first extracurricular sexual activity, I did wonder. Maybe my husband was just not too into sex because i was not "inspirational" enough, or because I was just lousy in bed to start with.
Well my sex partners have both had a wonderful time, and both were very appreciative. So I gained confidence that I am desirable and capable of giving pleasure and "inspiration."
So the big question is ... how will we feel?
Is there any way to know before hand ?
lisamay posted on Oct 31, 2007
| views: 1867
Comments
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silverwhisper said on Oct 31, 2007....
the short answer is: no, there's absolutely no way to know beforehand, or at least so i would think. my first threesome was something i thought i wanted very, very badly, but when the reality was upon me, i realized that this wasn't something i wanted--and up until then, for months, i thought it was.
so please be careful in pursuing this, lisamay: both for yourself as well as for your husband. does he want to hear you cry out another man's name, see another man make you cum? and do you want him to witness those things? those are questions you two should discuss explicitly beforehand. b/c in my first threesome, i didn't, and the fallout of that almost ended a deep friendship.
ed -
lisamay said on Oct 31, 2007....
silver.. did you go ahead and do the first one ?
when did you realize that you didnt want to, at what point ?
you said first one ... i guess that means there were more?
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silverwhisper said on Oct 31, 2007....
i did indeed. but when i realized that wasn't what i wanted, i was already taking her ass while she was riding my friend's cock so it's a hell of a time to stop, you know?
and yes, there were other ones, of both varieties.
i know this isn't the same sort of thing as having sex with someone other than your spouse while your spouse watches, but it's as close as i get from my own experiences.
ed -
TexKelc said on Oct 31, 2007....
Neither of you have experienced this. So, there's no way of really knowing how you would actually react when you are in the throws of it. One thing for sure...It will be somewhat different than the antipated response.I love the analogy of driving into a dark tunnel with many turns...Once you enter, you may be able to reverse out of it, until after you've reached a couple turns...Then the only way out of the tunnel is forward...(I hope that made sense.) -
lisamay said on Nov 01, 2007....
Good point Kelsey
it will probably be different than what we expect.
even though we have analyzed it to death.
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moyz said on Nov 02, 2007....
I dont think there's anyway of knowing how you'll feel if it's something you've never done...no matter how you analyse it with your hubby and no matter what you feel for each other...after the act...is when you'll really know how stable your boat is!!!!! -
TexKelc said on Nov 04, 2007....
I've really been thinking about this Lisamay, and it may have already been said. So, my apologies if so.
You know your husband, and obviously love aspects of your life together. Is it possible that he would change his mind, especially seeing another man strike a chord with you that he never has? What's your next step? At that point you are confronted with three bad possibilities (I only thought of three) cheating, leaving, or doing without.
You've been doing without...but my guess is that based on your passion for this subject, that may not be your desired choice.
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lisamay said on Nov 04, 2007....
What's your next step? At that point you are confronted with three bad possibilities (I only thought of three) cheating, leaving, or doing without.You've been doing without...but my guess is that based on your passion for this subject, that may not be your desired choice.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
doing without is not my desired choice, but leaving or cheating would not be acceptable options.
as i see it, i will either do without, or proceed with his permission ...
writing about it has been fun though. maybe that would be an outlet that might be a substitute ?
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anonymous said on Nov 05, 2007....
lisamay,
have you given any thought as to how you would feel if your husband had arranged the third person to have sex with you while he watched for the sole reason of wanting to have the guy cum in his mouth after pulling out of your pussy? what would you think after watching your old man suck off a another guy? it could be the reason he wants another guy around.
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lisamay said on Nov 09, 2007....
well anonymous
i gotta admit, thats a possibililty i had not considered ..
:)
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