Mama Said there'd be days like this...sing along everyone!
I am having just a fabulous day *please note the heavy use of sarcasm* Currently I am sitting at the office trying to focus and get my work done, all the while worrying about lots. The main thing on my mind - Hubby. He is in the ER at the moment. Why? Because he had been experiencing a pain in his side for a few days - well since last wednesday I guess - and its BAD. He wouldn't let me take him all weekend, but thats where he ended up anyway. So, I'm here cause I missed so much work last week from me being sick...worried to death. He had a cat scan, plus blood and urine work. I have no idea of what is happening, and I don't know if I need to leave to go get the kids or anything else. I do not do well when things are utterly out of my control.
And, to be quite honest...I'm more than a little irritated at him. He should have told me something earlier. I never knew it was bugging him until Sunday when he could barely walk because of the pain. HELLO??? Sure, be strong and manly all you want, but he gets on my case about telling him every little detail about how I feel, both mentally and physically every moment of the day. But he can't tell me...hey I don't feel so good, my side is bugging me? What the Fuck? He can go through my e-mail and print things because "I thought you hadn't read them, since it was marked unread" (funny they still were marked unread)
I know that I screwed up in the past...but this is beginning to get ridiculous. He says one thing and definitely treats me the opposite way. And he doesn't treat me that way out in the open...I feel like he is sneaking around snooping on me. Its weird. If he would come out and "Hey, I'm not trusting you right now" I'd be fine with it.
But right now thats all besides the point I guess. I am really worried about him, because no matter how irritated I am I don't hate him (those some days it would be easier) Last I heard was they were running tests, and tat was 2 1/2 hours ago. I just need to get a grip, but can't. And I don't have anyone...besides you all here...that I can just let it all out to. I am desperately missing my closest friend...but we decided that it can't be that way. There is so much history there it isn't even funny. But right now I miss him desperately...and really would love to even catch a glimpse of him, or even better yet hear his voice.
