Friday is nearly here. It's my long awaited day for getting fitted for shoes to compensate for my missing toe. I can't believe how nervous and scared I am.
I think part of this apprehension comes from all the talk of MRSA staff infection on the news. What I had was nasty enough. I don't want anywhere near that stuff. I have this irrational fear about it. I'm going to see professionals my doctor referred me too. This apprehension is surely unnecessary.
Tonight my sister, who is a nail technician, started to file my toe nails. You guessed it. She nicked the skin on one of the toes on the foot where I've had surgery. It was the first toe she started working on. She stopped immediately. We decided that they would be better clipped with straight edge clippers. I will have to get some. My toe nails have become soft from the vitamin e cream I've been using. It barely bled and I know I have just nearly healed from a much worse wound and this will heal. The fear welled inside me though. My brain told me it was irrational, but my body reacted with a sensation of wanting to vomit.
Lord help me. I don't want to be this way.
I hate feeling these irrational fears.
Do you ever experience irrational fears? How do you deal with them?
CW
CreativeWoman posted on Oct 18, 2007
| views: 111
Comments
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wombat said on Oct 18, 2007....
I am betting that you will be fine....just ride it out like you have been doing.Irrrational fears? Which one are you asking about? Multitudes....How do I deal with them?By waiting to see what happens...! -
MissMimi said on Oct 19, 2007....
I'm sure it'll be fine, but just to set your mind at ease, why don't you give your surgeon or one of the homecare nurses a call?
Your fears are certainly understandable. Just take deep breaths and give it some time. You're doing great, CDub, you really are.
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dailyachesandpains said on Oct 19, 2007....
You are doing a great job, CW! Keep that chin up!
{{{HUGS}}}
Daily
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queenparanoia said on Oct 19, 2007....
oh yeah... i dont know if you read some of my fear posts but most f those fears are irrational. and you know what i do to feel better CW? just breath in... and pray... yes pray... and today i'll be praying for you... =) -
Expendable said on Oct 19, 2007....
You can confront your fears or go hide in the closet. Bring a light bulb, the one in here's burned out. -
CreativeWoman said on Oct 19, 2007....
Wombat,
It's going to be ok. I'm sure of it. As long as I keep my blood sugar in check things will surely heal.
Mimi,
The orthopedic guy looked both my feet over today when I went for the shoe fitting. I was sure to point out the scratch. It gave him no concern. We went forward with the process.
Daily,
I will try to do just that. Thanks.
queen,
I pray quite often. Thank you for yours.
Expendable,
Lucky for us that I happen to have an extra light bulb. :-)
CW
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Eilan said on Oct 19, 2007....
I don't think your fear is irrational, CW.
My girls and I have been afraid of the wind ever since that darn tree fell on our house in August.
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CreativeWoman said on Oct 19, 2007....
Eilan,
Maybe these types of feelings are what the old timers call being gun shy? :-) I would be scared of the wind too if a tree fell on my house.
CW
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Mamie said on Oct 19, 2007....
How did it go sweetie pie? I see you said there was no concern from the "fitter"...were you happy with the outcome?I am starting to think that all fear is an illusion...which has no bearing on all of the irrational fears that I have, but I am trying to substitute that with faith....oy. Keep on keeping on, lady, I am right there with ya. Mamie -
CreativeWoman said on Oct 19, 2007....
Mamie,
I ended up with shoes that look like regular walking tennis shoes. I think they will be ok depending upon how they feel on my feet.
I pray and pray and then pray some more. I find it so hard to leave it with God after I pray about it. Why is that?
CW
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Mamie said on Oct 19, 2007....
I am not sure, CDubiya, we give it to God and then we take it back again...how silly is that! Maybe we should toss it real quick like and yell "no give-backs!"I bet your shoes will be fun and nobody will tell the difference! -
CreativeWoman said on Oct 19, 2007....
Mamie,
Such is the mind of a worrier. lol God must wonder what I'm doing sometimes. He probably barely knows I dropped a worry off before I snatch it back!
I'm sure the shoes will look alright. At least they looked ok in the catalog. :-)
CW
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