I spent last night at work until 0300, went home and was feeling really sad, I even cried before I fell asleep. I miss him very much, my heart truly misses him. How I regret not trying harder in the relationship, words that we exchanged to hurt each other with were unnecessary. How strange it is when you are full of hurt and anger how you feel so justified for saying hurtful words to each other, as time goes by, I find it less justifieable. I feel more upset with myself for saying what I did even though time has gone by. It weights on my heart tremendously. I was wondering earlier why everyone comes to me for their problems and issues and it is so easy to advise everyone else on what I think they should do and they thank me later and tell me that everything worked out great, but when it comes to me I am not my own best friend, I don't know what to do? why is it that way. I can't manage my own life and issues, which from reading from alot of other peoples blogs mine seem so small and meaningless. Yet why can't I manage my own?