I'm not ashamed to say that as soon as I got home yesterday, I tore off the interview clothes and put on pajamas. Why the hell not? I'm just chillin' at home, it's not like I'm gonna have company, right? So I was wearing a pair of flannel pajama bottoms and a t-shirt, no bra, when I hear a horn honking outside. I peek out the window to see a sheriff in the driveway. I'm thinking, 'ohshit, now what' and w/out thinking, walk outside exactly as I am. I'm sure I looked like a bum. Also, I have some weird condition where my nipples are ALWAYS hard. It's nothing to do w/sex, they've just always been that way. He exits his car holding a piece of paper, looks like a summons. To my relief, he is looking for someone else entirely. I tell him sorry, I just bought this house, perhaps it's for someone who used to live here? Then a light bulb goes off in my head. "Hang on a moment," I tell him, before he can leave. "I think I know who you're looking for." And then I gave him directions to the rednecks trailer. Since I don't know their names, I'm not sure if that's who he's looking for, but my instinct tells me I'm right. My directions sound like this:"Drive back up that way, around the corner, and you'll see two trailers on the right. One of them looks taken care of, but the one next to it has 14 cars in the yard, a trailer overflowing w/trash, and a million toys in the yard. That's them."
He stayed and chatted w/me for about 20 minutes after that. I was halfway hanging over the porch railing, trying to hide my front. He was really nice! He told me that some german guy used to live in my house, and the guys dogs had attacked him. Also that the german guy was a hunter, so maybe the meat hooks really were for animals, not people. I told him about my new job and he suggested that if it doesn't work out, I get a job at the prison nearby. He laughed when I told him I'd probably get knifed w/in the first five minutes, but I was being serious.
Before he left, he said that he lives five minutes up the road, and to let him know if I need anything. The first nice person I've run into up this way, although he might've just liked me for my nipples. I don't know, I certainly am not at my best right now, but perhaps that's the power of boobs.
