• Zayda said on Jun 26, 2007....

  like you, i don't typically open a PM from a user I don't already know in some capacity.
  
  
  although, if I'm clicking through PMs quickly I might pop one open from someone I don't know on accident. but i typically don't respond to the ones from someone i don't know either.

• polarheart said on Jun 26, 2007....

  ed, I bet you're perhaps one of the rare few to get pm's from "strangers" - it has never happened to me.  i have only ever got pms from those i consider to be my "huddle"

• polarheart said on Jun 26, 2007....

  Sorry, but i did not mean pms, rather PMs. . .that made me laugh for a bit

• dailyachesandpains said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I only got one and I did open it and it was about one of my blogs...someone asking about boston accents.  I thought later, I will never open another one again, even though the PM was no big deal.  I had a major 'DUH!' moment. 
   
  Daily

• silverwhisper said on Jun 26, 2007....

  super z: yeah, esp on SC, i wouldn't...on some discussion forums i might, but not here.
  
  polar: it's happened to me once or twice. not very often, though--and btw, i originally tagged this blog PMs and it was converted to PMS so i changed it. :>
  
  daily: huh? what was the person asking?
  
  ed

• the_infernal_optimist said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I haven't had it happen, but I would hesitate to open a PM from someone I wasn't familiar with at least in passing.
  
  ~Infernal
  

• Artemis223 said on Jun 26, 2007....

  Maybe this is a dopey question, but what if the PM is from someone who genuinely wants to strike up a friendship or a dialogue?  I guess it would be better for them to introduce him or herself in the comments section?
   
  Just wondering ...

• lioneljay said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I have no problems reading PMs from folks that I might not know. And since I've rarely received any, here or elsewhere, that were truly rude and undesirable, I generally respond as well. As far as I know, a PM in a forum environment can't contain a virus or worm the way that an email can, so I don't see any harm in opening PMs.

• silverwhisper said on Jun 26, 2007....

  infernal: i see that's not an unusual response. :>
  
  artemis: speaking solely for myself, i spend a good deal of time here in a lot of conversations. and frankly, if i don't already know someone, i'm more or less certain that i'm not interested in what that person has to say in private that can't be said publicly.
  
  LJ: i hadn't considered it from the computer security angle--to me, it's simply a matter of trust.
  
  ed

• Eilan said on Jun 26, 2007....

  Sure, I'd respond.  Why not?  Some folks are too shy to make public comments, but still want to have their say.  If they're asshats, they can always be blocked.
  
  Now, if it were one of those "u r hawt lets fuk" messages, I probably wouldn't respond, unless it were from Mimi.
  

• evil_twin said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I've never gotten a PM from someone I didn't already 'know' around here. But if I did, I'd open it. I wouldn't see the harm. If the contents were rude or inappropriate, I'd just delete it and move on. I'm WAY too curious of a person to just delete something without reading it first. I'd at least want to see what the person had to say and go from there. I agree with what Eilan said. Some people are shy to voice their thoughts publicly. I know of one person that feels exactly like that and they've been using the PM's to get to know people in a way that's more comfortable for them.
  
  -evil_twin LA
  

• uniquely-ironic said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I'm very reluctant to open PMs, even in a secure environment for computer security.  I do know that there is software that allows companies to track which emails were opened and which were not.  As it is, my oldest email adress regularly gets as many as several hundred junkmails daily.
   
  My work email (outlook) has a feature that helps all of this.  It give you a preview of what's in the email without having to open it.  Helps me decide if I need to dump it to junkmail or look at it.

• lioneljay said on Jun 26, 2007....

  Eilan, I'm hurt to read that you would accept such a proposal from Mimi so now I'll go public to point out that you've ignored at least a dozen equally persuasive missives from me in the last week alone. :(
  
  U r hawwwwwt newayz.
  

• silverwhisper said on Jun 26, 2007....

  eilan: sadly, no online site is free from idiots.
  
  e_t: heh...i've had enough experiences not to be quite that curious anymore. :>
  
  u-i: what web browser do you use? i don't believe that either firefox or opera are vulnerable to such things the way IE is.
  
  LJ: careful, i might have to write something in l337... :D
  
  ed

• Eilan said on Jun 26, 2007....

  LJ: I thought I told you--I don't bend that way! :D

• boyzmom said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I think I would understand using PM's instead of commenting openly because I tend to be shy, not so much but on some matters. So I would understand if someone sent me a PM even though I was not familiar with them, it would just encourage me to find out more about them. Not that I would ever get a PM from someone I don't know, I am just speaking hypothetically.

• MissMimi said on Jun 26, 2007....

  Ed, I haven't gotten any PMs here from strangers, but I'd open them.  I do elsewhere, and very occasionally I reply.  The slimy ones get mocked, I share them with Eilan, we mock them together, and then I delete them.
   
  Eilan, u r so hawt!!!!!11
   
   

• soloangel said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I dont do pms at all. I like remaining relatively unknown. I have nothing to say in a pm that I couldnt say in a blog. If I cant say it in a posting, Im not sayin it.  Ill b completely honest bcause I was once in Yahoo chat. Its to easy to say something and have it passed around bhind ur back. Im pretty sure mine are blockd. I like things uncomplicated in my life. Keeps the nerves unfrazzled. Please dont hit me with a fish. Bein honest. :)

• GrapeKoolaid said on Jun 26, 2007....

  All this talk of pms makes me angry.  >:O
  

• skald said on Jun 26, 2007....

  there are only three people I think who send me PM's and I already know them. Why not answer if any one sends me ? 

• sweet_cookie01 said on Jun 26, 2007....

  if ever i recieve a PMs from a stranger i would still open it though i may not reply if i dont feel comfortable responding to someone i dont know.... there is always a thought in me that what if the person means no harm and just wants to give you a message not in publics view? i mean whats important i think is the content not the sender, because you just never know if that person needs your help baldy and is too embarassed to go out in the open....

  i guess the question for me will be if i will respond not if i will read the PMs....

• Lioness said on Jun 26, 2007....

  No, I guess I will not open PMs whose source is unknown to me.. Oh well, I don't have much problem with that, no one sends me PMs. LOL

• blastfromthepast said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I haven't received any PMs from people I don't already know so far.

• PassionTraveler said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I get so few PMs I don't think I can answer the poll effectively.
  
  Also, most of the very few PMs I have received have been corrupted to where I can't open & read them anyway.
  
  But those I could open, I've answered.
  
  PT
  

• LloydTheBarber said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I have never opened any pm's, of course i have never gotten one either. I wouldnt probably open it anyway...with viruses and all. Somebody might want to sabotage ole Lloyd's computer. I guess, i might open it, but only if it were a woman and fairly perverted... 

• CreativeWoman said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I have only gotten PM's from people whom I am familiar with so far.  I really haven't gotten that many.  I would probably open the odd one from someone new simply because I am as curious as a cat.   I am speaking of here on this site.  I never open regular emails from people I don't know.
  
  CW
  

• sweetsoul said on Jun 26, 2007....

  I always open PMs...period. Answering them is something else though.

• robtard94 said on Jun 27, 2007....

  hm, it's kind of like getting a christmas present from a relative that you've never met
  It might be something great, and you'll never know unless you open it 

• jadestar said on Jun 27, 2007....

  I'm pretty new to this and i really hope that opening PMs would not pose a security risk to the pc's @ work......can you imagine the different shades my boss' face would turn if we got a virus here because of me........(not funny, not funny)
  I don't think otherwise it would hurt. So long as no one has my address or nr or private email or most importantly know where my daughter goes to school.
  At least you can block any sicko's that harass you.....
   
  Grape: you are sooooooo funny.....

• robtard94 said on Jun 27, 2007....

  What kind of person would attack through soulcast?
  Seems like somebody didn't try hard enough at life to me :D
  

• mom said on Jun 27, 2007....

  I never get any PMs from strangers, I think they have seen what I write and it scares them. They probably think I am nuts, and they'd be right :)

• husbandhater said on Jun 27, 2007....

  i would ed if i got some

• destinydiva said on Jun 27, 2007....

  I would open it.......  to delete it without reading  would drive me nuts with curiosity :-)
  besides....you may be erasing somebody that could have a very good reason for coming in to your life??
  never close a door without checking why it was open........    :-)
  
  
  Destiny x
  

• hotaka said on Jun 27, 2007....

  Assuming PM means personal message I only open the ones from the Al Qaeda. Otherwise I have no interest. I am too busy planning my next terrorist attack to be bothered. My next target will be an outhouse somewhere in Montana. Just you wait. It will be horrific!

• jadestar said on Jun 27, 2007....

  always love a sense of humour hotaka, it restores my confidence in the human race

• hotaka said on Jun 27, 2007....

  Just hope it's not your outhouse jadestar or you'll be in real shit!

• aliendudeintheuk said on Jun 27, 2007....

  i used to open pms frm people i dont know in the past but mostly when i chat with some of them i come to find out tht few of them are crackpots,ppl looking for naked cams and so on and so fort hence i quite reluctant to open pms frm ppl i dont know except pms frm friends in my chat list.

  thomas

• jadestar said on Jun 27, 2007....

  oh you funny person

• missb said on Jun 27, 2007....

  Thing is, i never got any PMs from people i dunno. Then again, if i ever did, maybe i would. Who knows.... I'm basically curious. Doesn't mean i would reply though (if it's offensive or sumtin) :)
  
  Cheers!
  B
  

• RollingC said on Jun 27, 2007....

  Leave it up to Hotaka to  spend his time raising up a stink in Montana instead of raising  up the devil and painting the town red.
  Regular e-mails from people I don't know usually get deleted unless it's propaganda and I'm bored and curious.....  :>)
  Rc
  

• aliendudeintheuk said on Jun 27, 2007....

  hmm jadestar if u want i could send u a pm but hey the pm i send is always accompanied by buzzing..lol.if you are a yahoo chat user u would know wht buzzing is all about but then i tend to block pms frm strangers except if the person in question is quite interesting to talk to.

• jadestar said on Jun 27, 2007....

  alrightie then.........waaay over my head - never done yahoo chat so don't know what you're talking about. I think I'm an interessting person, but hey that's just me.

• fearing said on Jun 27, 2007....

  I don't get PMs from people I don't know.  Don't I feel like the wall flower now. 
  I'd probably open them just to see what it was.  I also don't use Yahoo chat so that's new to me too.  I doubt I will be trying it.
  

• maemae said on Jun 27, 2007....

  I've never gotten a PM from anyone here. :-(
   
  But I imagine I would open any of them.
   
  I have gotten them on other sites, and I have had people PM me with a question or comment, or word of support, who didn't feel comfortable doing it publicly because they were new, or they didn't post much or whatever.
   
  In fact...that's how I ended up getting to know my boyfriend (whom I live with now).  He randomly PMd me with a question, even though we had barely interacted before that.
   
  Never rule out the unknown. :-)

• silverwhisper said on Jun 27, 2007....

  boyzmom: you know, i got my first such this morning. :>
  
  mimi: i think you should publicize the really dumb ones. i say share the happiness. :D
  
  soloangel: don't worry, i don't have a reason to do that. :D welcome to my blog--nice to see you here. :>
  
  grape: why, is there something about you we didn't know before? :D
  
  sweet cookie: that makes sense, although there are some people for whom it wouldn't matter who the sender is.
  
  lioness: no one PMs you? really? i find that surprising.
  
  blast: fair enough. :>
  
  PT: it isn't like i've had a whole bunch of PMs from folks i don't know either. :>
  
  lloyd: hey man, welcome to my blog! i'll confess that i'm a bit confused re: how someone's PM could be a virus or something.
  
  CW: heh...i don't think i ever realized just how curious you are. :D
  
  sweetsoul: well, i suppose that makes sense. :>
  
  robtard: o, i dunno--it might also be like opening your front door to see a flaming bag of crap, too, i figure. :>
  
  jadestar: my understanding is that a PM can't be a vector for a virus anymore than any other web page can be, although i suppose i could be mistaken.
  
  mom: hey, you are nuts--that's what we love about you! :D
  
  HH: that's not exactly an uncommon feeling, it seems.
  
  destiny: o, i wouldn't say it's always a complete mystery... :>
  
  hotaka: bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!
  
  aliendude: yeah, i imagine that's pretty common for some folks.
  
  miss b: yeah, it appears there's a good number of folks who would be more curious than anything else. :>
  
  rolling c: ah...the old boredom + curiosity cocktail... :D
  
  fearing: nah, you aren't a wallflower--it would appear that very few people do. :>
  
  maemae: hey, that's really nifty! i didn't know that--very cool!
  
  ed

• Mamie said on Jun 27, 2007....

  yes I open them because I think people think they know me from posts and then I go back and find their posts...a few new friends that way, love it!!

• Expendable said on Jun 27, 2007....

  I never get PMs from strangers, but I'd probably would - and ignore anything I didn't like.

• moonriver said on Jun 27, 2007....

  i read each PM i get whether i know the sender or not -- i don't get much of 'em anyway. i reply to most, if only to tell the sender i got and read his/her msg. for me it's a basic courtesy, somewhat like answering the doorbell or an incoming phone call.
  
  

• biglove said on Jun 27, 2007....

  WOW, Ed...I am a little surprised you wouldn't open something from someone new....your like the SC host....I figured you to be the first one to open a new message, at the very least read it before you judged it. 
   
  I don't see what the big deal is...it's not like a PM here would lead to your private e-mail address. And there are lots of new people that do make comments and are brushed over by the conversations going on between established friendships....it can be intimidating.
   
  I open/read anything anyone sends to me, and if it is something nasty then I just won't open anything from that person again....I agree with destinydiva...you never know who or why this person has come to you.....but that is just my opinion.
   
  Interesting topic Ed  ;-) 

• silverwhisper said on Jun 27, 2007....

  mamie: you're more welcoming than i am, i guess. :>
  
  ex: that appears to be the general consensus.
  
  moon: i've seen some awfully discourteous things said in a PM--not here, mind, but elsewhere--which has perhaps colored my views on the matter.
  
  biglove: good to see you again, i was wondering what happened to you. :> ah, but i'm not actually SC, you see. :>
  
  ed

• one_wired_kitty said on Jun 27, 2007....

  I open PM's from people l don't know ... but I can also block them if they get obscene/offensive .... *mwahahahaha*

• silverwhisper said on Jun 27, 2007....

  you most certainly can. :>
  
  ed

• cateemay said on Jun 27, 2007....

  I don't get too many PM's, so sure, I'd open them.

  And really, Silver, this was a pretty easy question. ;)

• silverwhisper said on Jun 27, 2007....

  [trout-smacks CM with great glee & abandon]

• moonriver said on Jun 27, 2007....

  sw -- yes, i sometimes encounter that too. in which case, i won't reply, and it would be the first and last time i open a PM from that particular sender...lol. so far, i haven't had the honor, er, horror, of getting such a PM here at SC. lucky me, i guess... :-)
  
  

• cateemay said on Jun 27, 2007....

  *Smacked*

  Yuck!

  *wipes off slimey trout*

• silverwhisper said on Jun 28, 2007....

  moon: i know what you mean. :>
  
  CM: i'll have you know i use fresh trout every time, all the time. :p
  
  ed

• beyondtheveil said on Jun 28, 2007....

  Ed- I'm assuming you are referring only to SC, so yes, I open all of them. I consider the whole bunch as members of the group and owe anyone that much. All PM's have been most civil and sometimes helpful.
  
  That is not to say I receive a large amount.
  
  Concerning e-mails as some have mentioned, I open nothing I do not know where it's from.
  

• silverwhisper said on Jun 28, 2007....

  that was indeed my intended meaning. :> i dunno, maybe i'm just a suspicious bastard?
  
  ed

• SecretFetish said on Jun 28, 2007....

  I get im's from horny perv that find my yahoo profile and pic and IM to ask where I live, or they IM just to say WOW, or something brilliant like that.
  
  My fault I suppose because I sign into yim on my cell phone and keep it on most all day while I'm at work, but I do that only because my secret fetish and I talk naughty to one another all day...so I must keep it on. I usually just ignore the people that IM me and I don't know them.
  
  Or I reply to them with some smart ass comment. heh heh
  

• SecretFetish said on Jun 28, 2007....

  
  

• silverwhisper said on Jun 29, 2007....

  not a solution i would have adopted for myself but sounds like you're having fun with it. :>
  
  ed

• SecretFetish said on Jun 29, 2007....

  As for here at sc....I've not gotten any PM's.  ;)

• JadeLondon said on Jun 30, 2007....

  Silver: I have only received a few PMs, but only from those known to me.

  I would have to say in all honesty that I would open the unknown message, even if I didn't necessarily answer it.

  I have had a number of commenters that mentioned that they were intimidated, for one reason or another, into not commenting on my posts. If someone felt more comfortable private messaging me, I could see it as being a legitimate reason to read what they had to say.

  By the way, I am speaking in terms of SoulCast only.

• silverwhisper said on Jun 30, 2007....

  SF: i'm sure that's probably changed by now. :>
  
  jade: i find the notion of being intimidated so alien that it never really occurred to me!
  
  ed

• Frlncwrtr said on Jul 01, 2007....

  It's a fairly straightforward answer, Ed...:) I agree with Jade, besides I am the curious type. I'm sure you can't imagine why, lol! Even though I agree with her in that aspect, there is at least one person here at SC that I DO know very well, and if he ever sent me any, his messages would be promptly deleted! I know you are wondering why I have not been around lately. My fiancee is very ill, and we are very concerned. This puts Soulcast on the back burner, although I do pop in for a few minutes here and there to see what's up. I hope all is well! freelance

• silverwhisper said on Jul 01, 2007....

  freelance, i have indeed missed you. sorry to hear about your fiancee's poor health just now--i hope she recovers quickly.
  
  ed

• JadeLondon said on Jul 01, 2007....

  Silver: It never occurred to me, either. The notion that I, myself--or my words--could be intimidating is definitely a puzzler.

  Frlncwrtr: My condolences. I hope by the time these words find you that she is steadily on the mend.

• Frlncwrtr said on Jul 01, 2007....

  Ed: I also have missed many of the friendly people here at SC. My fiancee and I both thank you for the well wishes!

• Frlncwrtr said on Jul 01, 2007....

  Thank you, Jade! As with Ed, my fiancee and I both really appreciate it! I'm happy to see that you are still active on SC.

• JadeLondon said on Jul 01, 2007....

  Frlncwrtr: Every now and again... :)

• silverwhisper said on Jul 02, 2007....

  you're quite welcome, freelance. :>
  
  ed

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