• MissMimi said on Jun 24, 2007....

  Kitty, whoever asked you that is rude.  It's nobody's business but yours whether or not you have children.  The worst reason in the world to have a child is because somebody else expects you to.
   
  There are so many children in the world who desperately need love.  A good foster parent is an angel in disguise as far as I'm concerned.

• NotSoSinglechick25 said on Jun 24, 2007....

  Kitty ~ I know exactly what you mean.  For me, it's always "when are you going to have kids" and when I say I'm not going to have children it's, "why not?" Like I owe them an explaination!  Sometimes I feel like I should write out a flyer and just hand it to everyone I meet so I don't have go through the grilling about my reproductive choices.  I commend you from wanting to be a foster parent.  It's probably the toughest "job" in the world. 
  J

• Eilan said on Jun 24, 2007....

  Take heart.  If you did have children, you'd be bombarded with a different set of inappropriate questions.
  
  If you did have a child, they'll ask, "When are you going to have another?  It's selfish to have only one child."
  
  If you have all girls, they'll ask, "Are you going to try for a boy?"
  
  If you have twins or more, they'll ask, "Did you conceive naturally?"
  
  If you have a large family, they'll ask two questions: "Are they all yours?" and my personal favorite, "Do you know what's causing that?"  (I embarrassed the hell out of someone once by responding, "Yes, and I had a great time doing it, too!")
  
  Unfortunately, a lot of people are nosy idiots, and I've found that when it comes to whether or not a couple has children, it seems like they're damned if they do and damned if they don't.  As others have already said, it's no one's business but yours. 
  
  So go forth and multiply. . . or not.  Whatever makes you happy.  There are plenty of folks to pick up your slack! :D
  

• beyondtheveil said on Jun 25, 2007....

  onewired- Child free could be the best course for most people to take.

• silverwhisper said on Jun 25, 2007....

  the appropriate response is "when's the last time you had relations?"
  
  when they protest, tell them it's just as little your business as your family-planning decisions.
  
  ed

• BlueHotRage said on Jun 28, 2007....

  Onewired, you're far from the only person who doesn't want to have kids. And anyone who judges you negatively for making that decision is a miserable person with (as Eilan pointed out) double-standards.

• thenack said on Sep 03, 2007....

  Hello kitty, I must say I think its better not to have kids if your not ready than to have them because of a generic thing God said. What I mean with this is the following, in a perfect stste, God would like you to have kids, but if there is any reason you may not care for them as He would want you to, then don't have kids. He also said that people who cause kids not to believe in Him will get a worse judgement than most others. In the same way God would not have you marry just for the sake of it....even though that is how He intended us to live.

  I find it interesting that you would foster but not have your own kids, do you mind saying why? (just interested)

• thenack said on Sep 03, 2007....

  I just read my post again and it sounds kinda harsh. I totally support it that you don't have kids if you don't want to. Its a big thing and you should be totally into it. Its a wise decision not to do things like this because of external preasure. It is between a husband-wife-and-God to decide.

   

   

• Taffy000 said on Dec 13, 2007....

  I totally understand how you feel.  I'm a bit of an oddball!  I'm married with no kids.  We want them-----we're not sure when.  I tell hubby we have to plan for them.  Who's going to watch them when we're at work?  In a perfect world, I'd quit my job & start raising babies.  BUT if we can't have kids I won't be devastated!!  I'll even be a little relieved because I know I won't screw another person up.  I asked hubby if he wanted to have all of the children that God chooses to send us & he said "no" I asked how he was going to stop it?  He said I sounded like a Christian.  With all of the talk I can just go off my pills & I won't have any problem-I'll be infertile!

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