After another wonderful visit with Master and Mistress, I am home again. As we get to know eachother better, I become more and more fond of Them.

They found intense ways of fulfilling my needs without marking me, which was very encouraging for me. I was ready to think I was just going to have to give up on BDSM play in my present situation. Each visit, I learn more about pleasing my Master and Mistress, and the affection they show me, and the pleasure they find in me just makes me want to serve them better and better.

It's interesting how coming home this time is different from the first. My mind seems more settled... I didn't go through the "spacey" days I had the first time. I have been emotional though... and tears started forming the first time I called Master yesterday. He was very unhappy to hear me in tears, and I know it's just because he feels frustrated that there's not much he can do to ease the transition. It's a fact of my life.

What is really hard to take, is the contrast. After 3 days of intimacy, touch, conversation, being social, it's really hard to go "home" to a place where I am rarely spoken to and rarely touched.

It's hard to tuck whisp away deep inside and take charge of the work I need to handle.

I'm sure it's the challenge of this change of "planes" that makes a lot of people decide that it's just not worth it. I'm not in that mindspace, but I can certainly understand it.

I wonder whether it will get easier, or more difficult as time goes on?