I am going to miss her so much and it’s not just hanging out with her but also being with her. She sent me an email and to be honest I was glad and sad at the same time, because I knew in my heart that it would be like a farewell. I do believe and know in my heart that our friendship was dwindling and I saw it happening and even though I wanted to do something I couldn’t because by the time everything came tumbling down the damage had been done. I never felt more hurt than when she told me that she left me for someone else, which struck me so harshly as though I wasn’t valid enough to call or be with. Worse was her saying it to me as nothing, even though I tried to let her know she didn’t get it. I won’t even pursue telling her and I stopped. I can’t go through this again, it is more painful and hurtful to deal with all the thoughts and memories that somehow just seem to cause more agony.  I am going to really miss her and for this I do cry inside more than she will ever know. It was good while it lasted and maybe one day we could be good friends again.