• secretlife said on May 09, 2007....

  i can imagine how hard.

  i wish you strength in doing what you feel is right for you and your children.

   

• silverwhisper said on May 09, 2007....

  AN, i'm quite certain that nobody who gets divorced ever wants the spillover to hurt the kids. having said that, there are a number of soulcasters who've been through the process. i hope that one or more of them finds you soon to give you the advice of someone who's been through it.
  
  ed

• MissMimi said on May 09, 2007....

  I wish you strength and grace to get through a very difficult time.

• lioneljay said on May 09, 2007....

  May you find strength and clarity in your journey, AN.

• Eilan said on May 09, 2007....

  Because I'm the product of such a relationship, I firmly oppose staying together for the sake of the children.  People tend to underestimate children's awareness of the problems in their parents' relationship.
  
  It's tough, but it'll be better for everyone in the long run.  Good luck to all of you.
  

• MissMimi said on May 09, 2007....

  Amen, and amen to that. When there's an unspoken and not so unspoken war zone in the house, kids know it. I felt nothing but relief when my parents finally put their marriage out of its misery.

• sweetsoul said on May 09, 2007....

  AN I'm so sorry it's come to this for you. Even the 'best' of divorces is no fun for either party. Sometimes you've just got to do what you've got to do though.

  I wish you all well.

• AlisonMarie19 said on May 09, 2007....

  Stay strong AN. Only you know what's best for you.
   
                 =(^-^)=   ali m.

• KayRoseOrchid said on May 09, 2007....

  I'm here and will check in from time to time AN, as long as you still like me and don't block me. Take care.

• leadoffkarma said on May 10, 2007....

  Do not feel guilty, you are doing what you know is best for your kids and yourself. You can do it you are strong woman and your kids need you to be strong. They will look back the same way I did when my mother left my father and they will be proud of you. I am definately proud of my mother.
   
   

• justhavehope said on May 10, 2007....

  wow thats serious. i hope that one day i'll be able to have that strenght that you have. much love and i'm with you every step of the way
  justhavehope

• RiddleGirl said on May 10, 2007....

  Good luck to you, my thoughts and prayers are with you.  I'm sure that you know in your heart what is best and if the marriage is not fixable, then it's not fixable. 

• jcarlp said on May 10, 2007....

  I'm going through the same thing.I felt the same way. It was a giant weight off of my shoulders when I filed. It will feel like the worst thing you've ever had to do, but you'll see in the near future that it was the best thing to do. The best thing you can do for yourself is normally the best thing you can do for your kids. My kids are happier now,because all time is spent on them. Not spent worrying about each other and the lies,deceit, etc..

• southerngirl said on May 10, 2007....

  Why have you made this decisions to leave your husband, if you know it is going to hurt him, then that leave me to beleive that he feel there is still a marriage life which you both share and for the childrens, girlfriend, maybe you need a zanx to releive some of that depression so you can thing.

• jcarlp said on May 10, 2007....

  Southerngirl sounds like shes had a few to many herself. More than likely thats how she deals with rough times.Don't listen to that crap.

• AlisonMarie19 said on May 10, 2007....

  Every comment of hers is the same... misspelled, no punctuation, and just one long run-on. It's hard to comprehend. Sometimes I have to read it 2 or 3 times to get the jist of things.
   
  Anyhow, I agree with jcarlp. Chin up, hugs for you!
   
                     =(^-^)=   ali m. 

• cotteralladams3 said on May 10, 2007....

  Why don't you go and see him and talk it over?  Maybe some counseling would help.  It sounds to me as if you are uncertain.  I can't get into someone's marriage but I would go and see him before making a final decision.

• AnnonymousNympho said on May 13, 2007....

  Thank you all for the support and well wishes!  After a rough week it's turning out better than I had thought.  He was resistant at first and was having a hard time (of course) but now we have worked through that and he knows I'm serious and it's happening.  We are communicating by phone and email now and are working out our finances and belongings.

• sweetsoul said on May 13, 2007....

  Thanks for the update. ((((AN))))

• anonymous said on May 15, 2007....

  You do realize that he has an equal right to custody of the children and that it is in their best interests?!  Before you take the children with you, you must talk to him first about custodial and living arrangements and then come to an agreed-upon solution.  You will also be better off sitting down with objective and fair lawyers and drawing up an agreement on child support, alimony and financial settlements (property, assets, investments, life insurance, furniture, bank accounts, etc.) that is fair to both sides.

• AnnonymousNympho said on May 16, 2007....

  Anonymous - No, there is no question about custody. These are not his children. And the children are not interested in seeing him. There will be no child support, or alimony. We have already split up our finances, bank accounts and furniture. There will be no lawyers, this will be an amiable divorce. This is not my first divorce, I know how to take care of things.

• anonymous said on May 18, 2007....

  Okay, I see.  It is wonderful that you two can settle it yourselves.  I would not be against alimony if you would benefit from it.  I am referring to my ex-wife, the one who wanted to clean me out, even though she is from a wealthy family. 

• silverwhisper said on May 18, 2007....

  cotterall, why are you posting anonymously?
  
  ed

• AnnonymousNympho said on May 20, 2007....

  Anonymous - in this case if there were alimony it would be me paying it to him.  He hasn't worked the entire time we've been married with the exception of the last month or so.  I have been supporting the family.

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