ARGUMENT WARS The passage that appears below appears long, but I assure you it is interesting. This is a warring couple. The arguments are intense and loud. Crying is routine. Who wins the war, he or she? Their's is a love marriage, now in the fourth year. Check out the differences between the female species and male species as elucidated by the Counselor. Wife: Sujata Husband: Dinkar ----------------------------------------------------------- The entire passage is a transcript of the Counselor's narration. The Counselor is speaking to the Husband. ------------------------------------------------------------ Yes, Sujata is the one who desperately needs your psychological help. She needs your shoulder. You do not have to loose your identity. I am not talking about bargains. Not about compromise either. How will you know about what to do or not to do to? Turn the problem into teacher. Key: Watch out for 'Arguments'? Now, instead of indulging in it dictated by habit or logic, PAUSE. Here is the chance for you to get cues about what she is saying. Give up the 'judgmental' attitude. Do not attempt to check what is right and what is wrong. This does not appear logical, does it? Exactly, the logical part of the 'male' psyche is to be suspended. Example Sujata: I am tired. Dinkar: You had a comfortable ride, why should you be tired? CHECK yourself here. Sujata is saying she is tired. Period. It could be because of premenstrual problem, some other stress, God knows what, but the fact is she is not lying. Now that you have understood (logic often does not understand, you have to accept) that she is tired your thoughts, words, actions will be in accordance. She knows what is happening to her. No one else knows. When I say, "I am hungry", I know. There is no argument, instead you look to resolve the 'hunger' issue. Now I am giving away one tip that makes the whole thing easy. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The beautiful part is here. 90 % of the times, you have to neither agree or disagree, nor give solution. YOU HAVE TO JUST LISTEN WITHOUT ARGUMENTS. Girls feel relief if there is a LISTENING ear. That is all they want. It is called ventilation. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Example When she speaks with her mother neither she solves her problem nor vice versa. Still they talk. Each provides 'LISTENING' ear. To get this tip implanted in the male cerebral cortex, the Counselor tells two small stories. A woman was clairvoyant and people actually crowded to meet her. One by one, each person will go and tell all the details and the pain to her. It was found that the number of people was increasing day by day because people benefited. Interestingly she said almost nothing. The secret of her success is she was FAED! Two psychiatrists were leaving home alighting in the same escalator. The younger one said, "It is tiring." The elder appeared fit and full of humor. The younger asked the senior practitioner, "Do you not get tired listening to all the problems?" The senior replied, "Who listens?"