Tough Love
Things had gotten out of control in certain respects….the talkback and showing disrespect had gotten so common as my wife put up with it on a constant basis, that it reached the breaking point.
Call it mother love or whatever you want to call it but I didn’t agree. From the beginning I let her know that I didn’t agree. But try telling that to a mother who is blinded by her vision of what motherhood is or should be. Her daughter had gotten to the point of manipulating her mom on such a daily basis that she honestly thought that she was in control. Then enter the picture, RollingC, who let her know from the beginning that things were not as she in her juvenile mentality had imagined and she wasn’t in control of her life but her parents were. Not only did she reject me, which I expected for what child wants to see their parents divorce and then have someone new take the place of one of them, but she built a wall around herself which caused me to do the same although I tried to control that.
To make a long story shorter her jabs and indirect insults were so constant that her mother was going crazy. Not only would she not accept the fact that we were actually training her for an eventual flight from the nest but she started from the day I met her to start with the lies and tricks to get her way. She discovered at an early age that her mom has limits and when those limits are reached she can usually get her way. The real problem was and is that she wants to train herself and lead her own life already but to also have us to bail her out of any mess she gets herself into. In other words she wants the freedom of an adult but none of the responsibilities, something that I've pointed out before but on deaf ears.
That night what set the whole thing off was the constant jibes that she was letting loose on us, specially on her mom as she also quickly picked up that I don’t go for that and that technique doesn’t work with me. She kept mumbling and blaming us for not having a job and that reason was due to not having her car, as we didn’t allow her to drive yet. And the fact is that she has already proven to be not only that she had her own agenda that she was willing to lie and manipulate for but also the party she went to and wound up dead drunk passed out, so how are we going to give driving privileges to someone that can't be trusted? The people had called the police and then us and also called Fire & Rescue. We got there just on time to say no thank you and took her home but it was a big emotional evening for everyone, specially her mom.
At any rate I started to say speak up and what the heck you talking about as you got yourself into this all by yourself when my wife blew a gasket with her daughter. The whole thing escalated to the point where my wife said enough is enough and now you’re going to spend time with your dad as you don’t like it here and you’re making life miserable for everyone.
So her bags were packed and she was sent to her dad , who complained and tried to get out of it at first, and when she got there she immediately started her conniving tricks with her dad. He gave her a much wanted cellphone which we denied to get as it was an added expense not needed by a teenager who wants to chat, chat, chat with the whole world. She already ran up the phone bill disregarding any text messaging limits with her friends and finally had a big fight with her dad about her “ freedom “ and going out all hours of the evening…etc.
My question to you fellow Soulcasters… what decisions in “ Tough Love “ have you ever had to make… or want or need to make in your lives?
Your input is much desired…..
Thanks
Rc
