• MsBradford07 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  What made you go to see a counselor?? 

• tbs230 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  Oh Lord, where do I begin?
  
  Aside from the crap that happened to me as a child. In October I had a minor breakdown and scared the crap out of my roommate. After much prodding from certain SC members whom will remain anonymous *cough Secretlife, cough Silverwhisper*, I called my counseling center at school and set up an appointment. I have to tell you, all kinds of stuff comes out during counseling. Dear Lord!
  
  I get suicidal, depressed, anxious, and all kinds of other cool stuff.
  

• secretlife said on Feb 20, 2007....

  are you ready for it to end? 

  do you feel strong enough?

  I see much strength in  you, but i don't know if you see it too....

  what does your counselor say tbs?

• tbs230 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  I don't know, my counselor definitely does not, she persuaded me to come in again next week. But I don't know. What with no insurance and all, I just don't know.

• silverwhisper said on Feb 20, 2007....

  tbs, if you want to do this, i suspect that you can. the question is, what do you think of where you are in your counseling?
  
  ed

• tbs230 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  Ed, I think that counseling has helped me figure out quite a bit. My anger is in check, and my communication skills are so much better.
  
  I don't know what I need, it feels that everyday something else comes up. I feel like I've moved on, but at the same time, am stuck in the same place.
  

• silverwhisper said on Feb 20, 2007....

  perhaps a break from counseling is in order, then? you've obviously had a lot kicked up and i think you need to resolve how you feel. while i'm a big fan of counseling, esp given where your own path has taken you, i also feel that one should try to come to terms w/ these things by oneself.
  
  btw, when you have time, i sent you a message at lit.
  
  ed

• tbs230 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  I didn't get it. There is no message. I think a break would be good too. I feel like I've become so dependent on other people. Having some time to myself would be good.

• silverwhisper said on Feb 20, 2007....

  weird--i have re-sent.
  
  if you feel that dependent, i think a break is a very, very good idea.
  
  ed

• tbs230 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  It's all a front...but I think that's what life is mostly about. Acting like you know what you're doing, when really you're as lost as the next person.
  
  I'm off to work, be back later!
  

• MsBradford07 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  I was wondering 'cause now I am taking therapy and last week I started crying and opened up to her.

• VICARIOUS said on Feb 20, 2007....

  After I got out of the institution I was going to go to therapy, but then I discovered something that really opened my eyes. 3 books, written in the order that you will grow as you heal.
   
  Dr. Wayne Dyer's:   Your Erroneus Zones
                                  Pulling Your Own Strings
                                  The Skies the Limit
   
  I used to be suicidal and a complete mess before I found these books.
   
  Paraphrased ... you can do anything you dream and no one will stop but you.
                              it doesn't matter what others think, only what you believe about 
                              yourself
                              (and my favorite) how long are you going to be dead?
                               (in other words do everything now before it is too late)
   
  best of luck 
    

• Lucytorial said on Feb 20, 2007....

  Hi TBS - trusting yourself to make the right decission will ultimately be the best thing to do...

  VIC my hb suffers depression (manic I think they call it you know up and down up and down).

  I baught a book for him "STOP thinking so much and LIVE"

  It is a great book providing fabulous tips on communicating withyourself and others, tips on how to move forward and through problems, how to change your perspective etc.  I look through it myself when I'm having a rough time.

  TBS - {{Hugs}}

• mom said on Feb 20, 2007....

  TBS- I started counseling because of my marriage to a man who was abusive to my children.  All kinds of things came out.  I saw him for a year.  I wasn't done but due to his moving I quit going.  I didn't want to go through the trusting thing with another therapist.  I was stuck also.  If you still feel stuck then you need to keep going.

• husbandhater said on Feb 20, 2007....

  TBS good luck! You know you best so if you feel a break is order break!
  I hope that while you've breaking you have come to some sort of peace honey.
  There are places you can go to get counseling and they will do it at a sliding scale fee where it can be affordable to you should you be ready to attend sessions again. My mom only pays 30$ for my brother to go to each of his sessions. You can do this and anything else you put your mind too. I have faith in you TBS.

• tbs230 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  I've been going since October, and I broke down after Christmas, because I saw them...him, for the first time since I started. Ms, keep going, it's really nice to have someone to talk to...for me it was like speaking to myself, but without the fear of being crazy. I said some pretty insightful things to myself during those times, lol.
  
  Vic, I will go pick up that first book this week, I need all the encourage that I can carry around.
  
  Lucy, I will look into that book too, thank you for that. And thank you for the hug, it's much appreciated.
  
  mom, thank you for your kindness, it means the world to me. You have the able to make me laugh and cry like no one else. {{{{hug}}}}
  

• tbs230 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  Thank you HH.
  
  You guys are so freaking wonderful, maybe you will be my reason.
  

• mom said on Feb 20, 2007....

  making you laugh is good but making you cry makes me sad :(

• tbs230 said on Feb 20, 2007....

  Crying happy tears mom, happy tears.

• mom said on Feb 20, 2007....

  oh well then that is ok :) *hugs* you are very special :)

• RollingC said on Feb 21, 2007....

  Therapy is good. It doesn't solve a problem but it points you in the right direction and shows you ways out of situations that you thought were incorrigible. Keep up the good work Tbs... I know you can do it... ♥

• husbandhater said on Feb 21, 2007....

  Oh Rolling C you have to show me how to do that heart thing. I love hearts.
  {{{{{ TBS}}}}} I meant to give you that lastnight!

• princessbitch65 said on Feb 21, 2007....

  Hey tbs, you have friends here also. Stay strong!:))

• MsBradford07 said on Feb 21, 2007....

  Thanks for the encouragment.

• silverwhisper said on Feb 21, 2007....

  hey tbs, hope you're doing better today.
  
  [hug]
  
  ed

• tbs230 said on Feb 21, 2007....

  Ed, Oh yes, in the sun nothing ever looks as bad as they do alone in the dark. Thank you for letting write that long spiel.
  
  Ms., that's what I'm here for...that and some wise-ass comments from time to time.
  
  princess, HEY!! Thank you.
  
  RC, I wanna learn the heart thingy too, so I can send you one. Therapy really does shed new light on things.
  
  HH, hugs to you too {{{{HH}}}}
  

• VICARIOUS said on Feb 21, 2007....

  What I discovered about therapy and healing, it dosn't work. We only get better if we want to. Everything else is semantics. The books I read motivated me into believing I could change and therefore live a better life. I wanted it. I found it.

• tbs230 said on Feb 21, 2007....

  Vic, I kind of see where you're coming from. For me, therapy is about finding someone who will listen to me rant and rave, and then question my motives, without sympathy, without pity. Family and friends can't do that. And you can't do it for yourself. I find that therapy does that for me.
  
  I don't look at it as a fix all, but an apparatus (new favorite word) to find my own way.
  

• mom said on Feb 21, 2007....

  TBS- I agree with you and Vic.  I think we get better if we want to but it sure helps to have someone who we can use as a sounding board to help us figure things out.  A therapist knows what to say and ask to keep us going the direction we need to. I had spent years trying to understand myself and it wasn't until I had a therapist that I understood myself better and it was because he helped.  Talking to family and friends don't cut it because they are biased, with a therapist he can say "Bullshit" or tell you your feelings are justified.  I think we can trust them more with our feelings because they can look at things differently.

• RollingC said on Feb 22, 2007....

  Counseling therapy is really what you make it not a magical thing that gets you results by itself.  All it does is point out the doorway...it's up to you to open the door and walk through it. Nothing more nothing less and it helps sometimes to have someone open your eyes and help you look but if you don't want to change then it's a waste of time.
  
  Oh and for you and HH....I'm at the laptop now and it doesn't work on laptops...but on a regular p/c keyboard you hold the alt key down and push the no. 1 on keypad(?). Different strokes will get you different results...hahaha...different strokes for different folks...errr....symbols. eg...alt and no.2 six times will get you musical note symbol.
  

• silverwhisper said on Feb 22, 2007....

  tbs, no thanks needed or desired--truly, it was my pleasure.
  
  ed

• RollingC said on Feb 22, 2007....

  ♥♥♥ The number three on the keypad...holding down the alt button.

• truthsayer said on Feb 22, 2007....

  Hey TBS:

  If you have a good one; one that can call you on your bluff, knows how to "read" you, and offers the kind of tough love that can only make you stronger...stick with 'em, until they cut you loose.  Then, like any true learning situation, you get to graduate, instead of drop the course.

  At least that's been my experience.  By doing that, I never had to have much counseling.  You know that Shakespeare quote from Hamlet:   "To thine ownself be true"?  When I was younger, I interpreted that to mean, 'do your own thing', be true to your own passions, wants, desires, etc.  As I matured, I realized that like all Shakespeare had to say, there was a deeper meaning:

  If I always tell myself the TRUTH, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, I can never be sick again. 

  All illness and woundings are the result of believing a lie.  Love yourself enough to tell yourself the truth.  You know whether or not you are done yet.  Did you accomplish what you wanted to when you started? Are you where you wanted to "be"? 

  truthsayer

• truthsayer said on Feb 22, 2007....

  btw...please check out my new blog.  It is the first since January!  It relates...

  truth

• VinceTCS said on Jul 25, 2007....

  TBS I am again late at answering interesting posts but I'll try anyway.  I am a therapist wandering around SC helping people when I can.  Therapy has many advantages if you have the right therapist!  The therapist should be able to help you decide how long it should take to work-out your issues.  The worst thing you could do is open-up a problem and then leave before the problem is processed.  This is called secondary repression and it burys the problem farther into your unconscious leading to problems in functioning.  So, if it comes out in therapy than it needs to be dealt with in therapy.

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