• danetteb said on Feb 20, 2007....

  *sigh*
  
  Most women know the feeling I think? 
  
  You cut off all the thoughts and emotions that once belonged to a relationship with him.  You don't listen to the same music anymore.  You don't go to the same special places anymore. 
  You probably even burnt all his love letters if you had the guts.
  
  But you can't help bumping into him by accident?  When you see him again, everything thing seems to go all wobbly.  Everything you told yourself you'd never feel or wonder about again comes right back at you, and hits you square in the face. 
  
  All the feelings.  The memory of his embrace.  It all comes right back, and you go all mooshy and maybe even a bit stupid? 
  
  That's how it was for me. 
  
  But when I decided to cut it all off, I meant it.  I still had the distant fluttering of strange emotions every now and again, but that goes away after a while.
  When those feelings came back, I reminded myself why I broke things off.  Why he wasn't the person I wanted to spend my life with. 
  
  I suppose if there was no real reason, then you can give it another try.  Just be sure that the reason you broke it off in the first place isn't going to cause you both heartache for a second time.  People's flaws stick with them most of the time, and if you're not willing to live with it this time, you might just be jumping into another breakup.
  
  
  

• kruuyai said on Feb 20, 2007....

  When he says he wants closure, doesn't that mean that he wants to end it definitely?  Maybe the best thing is to listen to what he has to say before you say anything. Sometimes, when people want "closure" they really want an explanation, or a chance to tell you off, or another foot in the door.  It could be anything.  I'd say listen to what he has to say, and then respond as honestly  as you can.  If you don't let him know how you feel, you'll always wish you had, but let him have his piece, first.

• redrocks said on Feb 20, 2007....

  how true...

• danetteb said on Feb 20, 2007....

  kruuyai is right... Listen first.

• skald said on Feb 20, 2007....

  This is really difficult. You have to ask your self whether you really want a relationship with this person again. If you are with that some body else you better think twice before leaving that person.

• redrocks said on Feb 20, 2007....

  u probably missed a note in my post: we are 10.000 km away.
  That's why it's not so easy to just meet in a café and talk and close definetely or whatever else..
  And that's what hurts the most!!
  

• kruuyai said on Feb 20, 2007....

  hmmm, then you also need to think about what you need in a relationship.  Long distance relationships are hard, and if you crave companionship, it's hard to get that from 10,000 miles away.  Is what you have strong enough for either of you to consider relocating?  That's a pretty drastic move, and if there's any doubt at all, I wouldn't recommend it.  There's a saying in Spanish, "Amor de lejos, amor de pendejos?"  (Love from afar, love of fools).  You've already hurt him once. Are you sure you could avoid doing it again?

• silverwhisper said on Feb 20, 2007....

  i think that he's trying a risk-free way of seeing where you are emotionally--those 10k miles make it completely risk-free for him. JMHO.
  
  ed

• gingersoul said on Feb 22, 2007....

  Red... there is also this saying...."Far from the eyes, far from the heart" and this is true as well.......

  it means that long relationships are tested differently ... and i know it way too well.....:-)..

  it takes alot more patience, careful choices of timing and words and quickness in reading the signals...but it gives you perspective....you can't stay upset over silly things when you have few time to spend together..

  it shapes the lovestory in a different way...

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