My school is officially a "dry campus", which means students aren't supposed to get drunk and throw up everywhere because the administration forbids it. If somebody [i]does[/i] get drunk and throws up (this somebody is from off-campus, obviously), the school slaps a fine on everyone in the dorm. This is supposed to cut down on drinking in the dorms, although it doesn't work too well because the students in the dorms still get drunk every now and then (ie. every day). Obviously, the school needs a new plan on how to deal with drinkers. Fortunately, I have a plan: shock therapy. Simply put a computer chip inside the brains of all the students, and make it so that students will get a 500 volt shock whenever they throw up. Soon, students will stop getting drunk and throwing up. It's as simple as that! Of course, I realize there may be some negative side-effects to this plan. For example, people would get shocked unnecessarily whenever they get the flu. Anorexics might receive an unfair amount of shocks, too. However, those are risks my school is willing to take, because God knows the school will never take the ultimate risk and actually admit that students on campus drink alcohol.