Every once in a while, a game comes across my buzz radar, telling me I have to watch at least part of this game, because history will be made.

Saturday’s tilt between #1 Ohio State and #2 Michigan is such a contest. It is essentially a playoff game: the winner advances to the BCS Title Game in Glendale, Arizona, while the loser will more than likely accept an invitation to the Rose Bowl in Pasadena (besides, the Rose Bowl, a stickler for tradition, would love nothing better than to have a Big 10 and a Pac 10 team butt heads, perhaps Michigan vs. USC or Cal?).

Too bad I won’t be able to root for either side, though.

Why is this so? Is it a self-imposed ban, perhaps because I’m a notable member of the media, watching the game with neutral interest?

Wow, that’s too much bullshit posturing even for me.

No, I really can’t root for either side, because, quite simply, I hate both teams.

While I’m not alum, I’ve always backed the Notre Dame Fighting Irish as if they were my own team. Yep, the team most of the nation loves to hate is the one I just love to watch. Since ND is tops in my book, Michigan can take a fucking long walk off of a short dock.

As for Ohio State, well, the Buckeyes think the football world revolves around their state and nowhere else. The scarlet and gray can’t do any wrong in their eyes, and they seem to think football would wither and die without their support. Bunch of smug bastards that deserve to lose, I think.

So, since I don’t have a tactical thermo-nuclear device to drop on Columbus Saturday, I guess I’ll just have to watch the game with really no vested interest in the outcome (and no, I’m not a gambler, by the way) save one: the result will only improve the stock of 1-loss teams like ND.

But while I have an intense hatred for one school, and a very detached dislike for the other, I have to admit Saturday’s showdown has all the other rivalry games beat, and I’m not just saying this because it’s the 22nd time in college football history that #1 and #2 have met.

Concentrating on the major schools, I really can’t think of a more intense, more at-stake rivalry in all of NCAA football.

I don’t mean to say this, knowing that I’d only be stirring up a hornet’s nest for all those out there who’d disagree with me in a second. Some sportswriters feel the only way to gain popularity is to disagree with everyone else, even if the position they take is so incredibly unbelievable. Yes, I hope there are people who are willing to read what I write, but I don’t want to create attention to myself for publicity’s sake.

The only reason I bring up the idea that UM-OSU is the biggest rivalry because, well. . . all the other big-time rivalry games come up a little short.

If this were the 80s, then I’d go with the Nebraska-Oklahoma tilt. Both clubs have battled for the top spot in the country at least once before, in 1971, I think, but it seemed like the national championship picture in the 80s was shaped in part due to this game. Plus, both states are just so football mad, a loss probably causes severe depression to last for weeks.

Then you have all the in-state rival games, like Auburn-Alabama, Georgia-Georgia Tech, USC-UCLA and Florida-Florida State. All have had their big moments, but the scope of their impact on the college football landscape is pretty much statewide, not nationwide.

Army vs. Navy was a pretty big deal back in the day, like, say the 40s and 50s. There was no shortage of topflight athletes joining the respective academies. Other than the occasional side vying for a low-level bowl bid, this tilt only holds a special meaning to those who served for either side.

Being a ND fan, I could put up the game against USC against the Wolverines and Buckeyes affair, but ND-USC still lacks the super-psycho, intense hatred Michigan and Ohio feel for each other. Or at least that’s what I’ve heard.

So basically, I’ll try and watch some of Saturday’s game, hoping that it’s a good, close one. I may have a classic dislike for both teams, but the game’s the thing. And that’s what makes it a classic battle.

(Now, about that nuke I wanted to use, perhaps I can send Green Bay a care package or something.)