I think it'd be great to live in an old folk's home. I don't mean a nursing home..I mean one of those apartment complexes for the elderly-capable. Those are nice. The interior decorations are marvelous. And they're so quiet, too. No dogs waking me up at 3AM. No neighbors having screaming matches on weekend nights. Everybody would be in bed by 7PM. Dinners at 3:30. I'd have all my meals cooked for me. They even take you on field trips a few times a week. I like field trips. We'd go to the market. I'd like to go to the market.
And I hear that the elderly have more sex than anybody because they're not worried about getting pregnant or getting STDs. And even if they do get one, they probably figure that they're gonna die before the STD can take 'em anyway...so what's the problem?
I don't know if I could handle the smell, though. Easter weekend is a big holiday for delivering to those places. People send their moms a plant for Easter to make up for throwing them in one of those places. Yeah..a plant should make up for it. They probably don't visit because of the smell. It's indescribable. It's like...Bengay mixed with feces mixed with urine in a tub of decayed flesh. It's the "perfect storm of odors," really. But if I could get past that, living there would be my dream. I mean now..not when I'm older. I think they even do your laundry for ya. It's like a hotel. And I LOVED living at Motel 6 for a couple months after our house burned down. That was the proverbial whip.
Ahhhh...dare to dream, I suppose. Color me lazy.
