Its hard to tell. Either I'm a hag of the highest order or I give off a strong "taken" vibe; either way, getting hit-on doesn't happen all that often to me anymore. I suppose the fact that I usually have a passle of monkeys in tow might also have something to do with it.
I was sitting in the computer lab of my university innocently tracking down my resume. (I pay an arm and a leg for that school so I might as well use all the free stuff I can....like free printing)
There was only one other person in the room. He kept turning around to sneak a peak at me. I figured he needed help or something so I asked him.
He smiled and asked me if I knew how late the lab was open. (like he didn't know)
I smiled back and assured him it was open well into the evening. Then I told him to ask the attendant (when he returned) just to be sure.
He went on with small talk about the temperature in the room compared to the temperature outside (it was cold in there...as usual and I suppose the fact that my nipples were protruding through my shirt brought the subject to the forefront of the guy's mind). Blah blah blah. Whatever.
I was busy and wanted to get out of there, but I wanted to be nice, too, so I chatted for a minute.
I went back to my work and he to his, but it didn't take long for him to start another conversation. What are you studying? How long have you been going here? What's your name? Questions questions questions....
The next thing I know he's shaking my hand.....not just any hand shake....the lingering kind. He's all smiles and my-name-is-Mike and will-I-see-you-around-campus-? etc etc etc...
Could be he was just be friendly, but...i kinda...just a smidgen...hope it wasn't the case.
happykat posted on Oct 06, 2006
| views: 1470
Comments
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silverwhisper said on Oct 06, 2006....
not well, not smoothly, but definitely flirting.
ed
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scalywag said on Oct 06, 2006....
yup, I agree, he was checking you out.
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RollingC said on Oct 06, 2006....
yep...sounds like it.
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Alyss said on Oct 06, 2006....
Sounds like an expression of interest to me HK.
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Zayda said on Oct 06, 2006....
Yes, he was flirting.
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secretlife said on Oct 06, 2006....
unhuh......flirting for sure.
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sam_ting_wong said on Oct 06, 2006....
Lingering handshake? Definitely flirting.
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raft said on Oct 06, 2006....
It must have been the suit and high heels. *wink*
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RollingC said on Oct 06, 2006....
hey look at it this way...you still got what it takes..*wink*
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harriedpsychmajor said on Oct 07, 2006....
just by your description of this guy, HK, this guy is creeping me out! ive seen guys do this and i wonder where they summon the nerve to do it. then i realize this is the kind of person with no idea of personal boundaries. i have a feeling youll see him again, much as i hate to say it.
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kelly said on Oct 07, 2006....
I see what you're saying, harriedpsychmajor, but for crying out loud if we all kept incredibly tight personal boundaries no one would ever meet anyone! Guys like that summon the nerve because they HAVE to. It's not like the women are going to come asking the men out (most of the time). Let's face it, no matter now modern or enlightened we all think we are it's still the guys who do most of the asking.
On another point, I can count numerous times when I finally figured out waaaay after the fact that someone was flirting with me. Unfortunately it was more often someone of the wrong sex. ;-) I wonder why we can't be better at recognizing the situation as it happens and act on it? Nevermind. I know. It's fear.
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hotaka said on Oct 07, 2006....
Oh, harriedpsychmajor, he might not be creepy at all. I am terrible at expressing interest in someone. If I am just being friendly I can be just fine. But if I really want to get someone's attention I am clueless. If the guy is really interested in getting to know HK he may have been struggling within to think of what to say. Also, how do you know when you're being too forward and invading personal space as opposed to being too casual and not getting anything across at all? What is too forward to one person might be normal chit chat to another.
Not smooth no, but definately he was making some effort.
What did you think of him, HK?
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Bronx said on Oct 07, 2006....
HK: He was definitely hitting on you.
The part that worries me, though, is whether or not he would still have done so if you two had not been alone.
Of course, your nipples hardening due to the cold environment may have given him some extra ideas. You know, some years ago I would have taken that to mean a woman was horny or needed personal attention of some sort.
It's up to you to decide.
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precision said on Oct 07, 2006....
just sit back an enjoy it...what can it hurt?
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gingersoul said on Oct 07, 2006....
I agree with kelly and hotaka.......that poor guy was flirting the best way that he could...
i personally love when men are so clueless on what to do and yet they keep trying.....they have gut...it takes a lot of courage sometime to step out of their circles and talk to a stranger ...
how you respond to his approach is entirely up to you...
if i were single and if i liked the guy and the way he was talking and looking at me didnt give me any bad alarming sensations of danger, i would have definetely went on to have a coffee with him, if asked.
But i come from a country when men approaching women is so the normal thing that women dont get suspiciuos, we get bored...
i think a man expressing his appreciation of women is nice....not to such extreme, annoying levels when you feel almost passing through an Xray (like many men i saw doing) but a tasteful, playful hit is more than welcome. It spices up your day...
We women should do the same...LOL
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monozuki said on Oct 08, 2006....
Be nice to him ^^
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IFMU said on Oct 08, 2006....
Hun.... I know you and I know what you look like.
He was hitting on you. or at least wanted to and wasnt to sure how to go about doing so.
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happykat said on Oct 09, 2006....
Ifmu, you're being too kind.
The guy was awfully young for a *coughcoughthirtysomethingcoughcough* married woman. I mean, he was nice, but he forgot the fundamental look-for-a-ring step.
It was flattering (when i figured it out), but I won't be seeing him around....anywhere.
Good luck to the kid!
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IFMU said on Oct 09, 2006....
HK..... just when in the hell am I "Too kind" when it comes to this sort of thing?
Puuuhhleeez.
As for the ring thing, hun, I know you've been out of the 'scene' for awhile and all, but I know you are far from stupid. There are some people who look FOR the ring, and prefer it to be there. Then of course there is the step that some people that actually like the so called 'older' types for ... encounters. Afterall, they at least have an idea what they like when it comes down to it.
Granted, it prolly is better that you wont see him around or whatever the case, but again.
He was hitting on you. or at least wanted to and wasnt to sure how to go about doing so.
And as I have come so familiar with saying recently...
Accept it, acknowledge it and move on. ^_^
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anonymous said on Sep 11, 2008....
Sooo... what if...the guy is, say, umm...a doctor that you met while in the hospital and it wasn't creepy or weird or uncomfortable... it just "was". It was nothing, right? or was it? God, I'm losing my mind, and feel like an idiot. Any advice/opinions welcome. Thank you. -
RollingC said on Sep 11, 2008....
anonymous.....
Make like a lion in a Roman Circus devouring Christians and GO for it.
Let them hear you Roaarrrr...... :^p
Rc
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anonymous said on Sep 11, 2008....
wow! thx rollingC. : ) it was only a handshake, but it was a lingering one and I remember thinking to myself, "why did this guy hold onto my hand those extra seconds"? It sounds sooo corny I know. But I know what I felt. maybe he felt bad for me because I was so ill? I cant get the guy out of my head. I feel like Im in high school all over again. lol. Im a very level-headed person normally. Im just at a loss and prefer HIM to pursue but I suppose he wont being I was a patient in the hospital for a week. : ( And, of course, there's always the possibility that I'm way off base with this. I need more advice. Im way too shy to "devour" at this point - however, I won't completely rule that out as an option. ; ) I have to go back for an appt soon and once again a couple months after that. Thx!! -
RollingC said on Sep 12, 2008....
Hey anon....(why anon..we all is anyways) There's nothing wrong with asking in a polite way. I haven't flirted in a million years although it's a good game if you keep within your boundaries and stay inside the socially accepted " harmless " flirts.
Good luck and what the heck...the worst thing that could happen is he says no and if you don't do anything then you'll never find out will you?
Rc
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sleepless08 said on Sep 13, 2008....
Thx Rc... I know...you're exactly right. (oh it says anon because Ive been posting from my cell phone & too lazy to sign in. lol. anyway, I'm going to wait till my next couple of appts to see what happens. I thought if nothing comes of it then, but I still "sense" something, I could send him a little "thank you" note/card and maybe slip a few extra kind words in it-nothing too mushy or corny, but enough to where he can read between the lines. that way I save myself what could be embarassing humiliation but at the same time, I can let him know Im interested - and won't sue lol- AND it puts the ball in his court & if I hear back, great, but if not - at least I know I tried and wont wonder forever if that sweet lingering handshake meant something or not. ; ) What do you think? Any flirty suggestions? : )
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