That's apparently what one of the turds around the corner thinks.  I was just getting our mail.  I ignored them as they have done to me in the past.  I did hear the shit though.  I don't think that I am bad.  If I killed the dumb ass's mom or something, yeah that would be bad.  Point blank, I am not hurting anyone.  I think they are crap because they have participated in making me paranoid about Ed.  There was no just reason for it.  If they want to do drugs, that's their business.  If I want to express myself, that's mine and whoever's else I tell.  Still, that doesn't mean I deserve to be harassed in the trailer park or online.  I can't worry much about the jerks around the corner.  They are just young idiots that seem to have nothing going for themselves.  That's the way it looks to me.  I don't know if it's an accurate observation of them for sure.  Whatever the case may be, I know that I am not bad.  I have been trying to better myself with great difficulty.  Part of me wants to die while the other one doesn't.  That's hard to keep balance of.  It's a constant battle within my own being.  Part of me doesn't see any point in trying anymore, because of all prior disappointments.  I fear that its all I will have to look forward to if I live.  There is still a part of me that is hoping things will get better.  Whatever happens, I can forgive myself.  That doesn't make me bad.  I can't forgive them though.  I am not respected by them so they can all kiss every ounce of my big fat ass.