Actions speak louder than words.  and saying that you'll call me at lunchtime does nothing but get my hopes up.  so does saying you'll call during a break in your gig.  I'm crushed, I'm tired of being crushed.  This is going to end in a huge argument...there's no talking to him without one.  He can't ever just hear your side and try to problem solve...he automatically feels like you're attacking him and gets defensive, then we argue, then I apologize and try to make him understand what I've been trying to say all along, then maybe, just maybe...it'll get better for a month or two.