I have to believe that.  I know that life has an up and down effect.  Still, I have to get over my immobilizing fears.  I fear that I would get attacked by mind readers if I started working again.  Maybe instead of fearing it, I should embrace it.  I know that I'm not doing anything wrong, so why should I fear what people would find out about me?  I have calmed down alot over time.  I don't want to kill anyone.  I don't want to do bad spells to anyone anymore.  I have decided that I want to be a peaceful person to the best of my ability.  I still get cussing mad at inademate objects though.  That I have to learn to control before I do deeply consider going back to work.  I can't worry about what other people think of me.