Doesnt it just suck really flippin bad to realize someone has been taking advantage of you!? Usually I dont realize bc it NEVER happens...until I just realized I was being taken advantage of. Maybe not purposely, or maybe not with bad intentions, but thats not really the issue...the issue is that she should have known better and been less self absorbed and greedy or absentminded or forgetful or whatever name you wanna call, she just shouldnt have been any of that. But she is, or was, not anymore, never ever again am I gonna let her milk me for one more penny. I told Phil that too. After I explained why I had this revelation, he totally agreed...
When two people (especially woman) are friends there is sort of an unwritten code. That code is hard to define bc with each couple of friends it is tweaked a little. But in general I think I would describe it as "What is mine, is yours"...and VICE VERSA.
If a friend is a little short at a luncheon, you offer to pay her way. She is gracious and says she will buy the next meal. You nod, thinking its not a big deal, she would do it for me.
If its cold outside and you stop at the station for gas and a beverage she yells out the window "hey, can you get me a rockstar, its too cold out there for me". You of course say sure. Your not gonna stop and turn around and retrieve the close to 4 dollars, youll just buy it and get the money from her later. She would do the same for me.
Or maybe while out on the town for drinks she buys you a Pabst beer...You thank her, and say youll get the next drink. The next drink comes and she orders 2 shots of Patron...ugh...
Do you see where im going with this? There is a thought out workable system that women all around the country have made for their friendships. But when one friend slacks off....shit hits the fan...
You all know that I am dead broke, like really really fucking broke...Ketchup soup broke.
My friend Melissa does all the things I mentioned above to me ALL the time. She very rarely if ever "gets me back". She is not close to broke. Before I never realized how far from broke she was. I always thought she was just "ok". I knew Jason made good money but I knew they had some expenses too...
SOOO, I bit the best friend bullett and out of pride and a bunch of other nonesense, I NEVER have asked her to pay me back.
Just this weekend she did the gas station bit on me and I bought her a $3.99 5-hour energy and she hogged my Celsius drink and ate my dorito cheese crackers...No big deal. She said she would pay me back for the 5-hour energy shot, nope, didnt see a cent.
I ALWAYS drive us wherever we go. I always buy us both the fancy meals while every once in a blue moon she will get me something off of the dollar menu.
My point is that our system hasnt worked for a long time, but im a generous and good friend and never wanted to bring it up or throw a fit about it. I secretly thought that maybe she had some financial woes of her own...Man, that was stupid of me.
Yesterday I went to go see the house that her and her husband bought....$75,000 house, its pretty nice, the house isnt what pissed me off though (it lacked character, it was very cookie cutter). What pissed me off was all the BRAND NEW shit that it was furnished with. As she was giving me the tour she pointed out every piece of fantastic extravagant furniture and explained the great "deal" she got on it.
"Oh, and this mahogany armoire, only $1700.00 and Neb Furn Mart."
"Oh this matching sleigh bed and vanity and dresser just $4,000.00"
"So you like my new flat screen? Cool, it was on sale for $3200.00, its got a chip on this side"...
I took an estimated mental tally of all the price tags she was telling me were deals and holy crapola! She spent like $23000.00 on ALL new shit....ALL OF IT!!!
I cannot help but think of all the times she didnt offer to buy me a drink or my meal or to get me a soda or offer to drive or come to my house instead of me going over there EVERYTHING....
I mean, I just realized I was getting taken advantage of. Melissa is obviously a helluva a lot better off than I am...May I add, none of this was on any kind of loan or financed, it is all paid for in cash.
It just shocks me. Im so happy she is doing so well...it just pisses me off that she can listen to me complain about how im floundering in this economy and barely feeding my family and she has the nerve to ask me to pay for her meal....
Not again, not one more cent is she squeezing from me. Its just rediculous.
