I feel like there are still a few tidbits to dump from my brain. Oh, one thing I know, I am going to be putting up a couple of picture posts sometime in the near future, whenever I get to uploading my images to Photobucket and then posting them. I don't know when I'll get time ... but soon.
Oh, also, it seems that something has just been in the air in general as arguments and such go. Apparently while my whole family drama was ensuing, my BIL, BILBM, OFHG & TFYO were all having an issue too. As it stands now, BIL & BILBM are all pissy at OFHG & TFYO and vice versa. I'm afraid I have to side with OFHG & TFYO on this issue.
You see, when BILBM drinks, she sort of gets a little ... ohhh ... hussy-ish. Maybe uncomfortably over friendly would explain it better? Inappropriate? Slutty. Yeah, that one says it. TFYO didn't know about this, and one night BILBM pretty much walked right up on him and was looking to see what she could see while he was trying to go to the bathroom. Further, she was also acting in a very provocative way she shouldn't have been. It was utterly inappropriate and it made him very uncomfortable. TFYO told OFHG about this, as she was not there that particular night.
She was a little upset that BILBM had acted that way to him. TFYO was just upset by it because he had felt so uncomfortable. Lo and behold, my BIL felt that there was something astir, and he questioned TFYO. TFYO eventually came out and told him what the problem was, that the way BILBM acts and acted makes him uncomfortable. He didn't say anything because he knew the two of them were having problems and didn't want to dump that on them too. He figured he'd just be a little more cautious and let that particular incident go. My BIL chose this as an opportunity to call TFYO a hypocrite for not just bringing the problem up, when TFYO had gotten upset for my husband and I not bringing up our issue with them a couple of weeks ago.
Well, anyway, arguments ensued, my BIL & BILBM overreacted as usual, and now they're all in a hissy fit at one another. My BIL has already thrown his threats around that he will not tolerate OFHG acting like a bitch to BILBM, and that TFYO better make sure that OFHG doesn't act that way. Only problem is, my BIL thinks he doesn't have to be held to the same standards with BILBM. That's not gonna fly. I don't even agree with it, as that was an issue in the past with us all as well.
My BIL and BILBM seem to think they can do or say whatever they want without being held responsible and undergoing the consequences. Eh, sorry, it just doesn't work that way. Thus far we've not been drug into it, besides us being used as an example for why TFYO is a hypocrite. It'll be inevitable though, and my BIL & BILBM will be told the same thing as what I told TFYO & OFHG, more or less.
TFYO & OFHG are our friends/BIL & BILBM are family, we had nothing to do with the issue, and it's not our business to be involved. We won't be made to 'choose sides' and be drug into the scenario. If somebody doesn't like it, tough cookies, they can walk on.
As of yet, nothing has happened. Personally, I feel that BILBM was in the wrong. I don't feel she has any right to get upset because they can't accept that she's like that. See, she doesn't deny being that way, she just doesn't feel anybody should get mad at her for it. I'm sorry, if you're acting like a slut around my man and you're gonna try to see his junk and show him yours and act suggestive to him... no bitch, you have got to go, sorry. That's why I don't like drinking around her, and now TFYO & OFHG have learned this important lesson.
Funny how my BIL tried to butt in to our friendship a couple of weeks ago to 'make things better' and wound up getting us pissed at him and BILBM, and then OFHG & TFYO were already aggravated at them for another reason, and now they've added on this reason. Gee, do we see some kind of pattern here?
Anyway, about the specific issue at hand though ... from what you've been told ... I mean, would you agree that BILBM should be accountable for her actions?
Hegemone posted on Oct 09, 2009
| views: 86
Comments
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simplyconfused said on Oct 10, 2009....
Yes yes and YES! BILBM SHOULD be accountable for her actions. If she knows she acts like that when she drinks, why does she? That's not fun, that causes shit like this. And honestly your BIL should be kind of pissed at her whenever she drinks and acts like that. I know I would be. -
CreativeWoman said on Oct 10, 2009....
I would just stay completely away from all of them when they are drinking. If they can't be friends when they are sober, they certainly can't when they are drunk.
She should be held accountable, but then I ask too... Why is the guy going to the bathroom in a non-private place anyway?
Hege, I've never been much of a drinker. So, I guess I don't see the fun in it.
CW
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Hegemone said on Oct 10, 2009....
Simply - Ha, that's what I can't figure out ... IS he mad at her, and deflecting it off on our friends? Is he mad at her as well as mad at our friends? Or is he simply just mad at our friends and thinks she's the goose laying the golden eggs or something? I'd be supremely pissed if my significant other were walking around acting like that, drunk or not. Also, he might just not want to deal with telling her to knock it off, so instead he'd picking shit with friends, instead of trying to solve the issue. Ah, gotta love the drama ... well ... when you're not involved, lol.
CW - Oh you're right there, they do all need to stay away from one another, and I think this was just the event to prove that. There will always be SOMETHING that sets them all off, so it'd be better for them all to just stay apart. So far as why he was going to the bathroom in a non-private place , well, he was and he wasn't. Nobody likes going into the house to go to the bathroom if we don't have to at the farm (because they have a severe bug infestation) ... so usually the guys at least will go off a ways, alone, to as secluded an area as they can find, and do their business. It may not be IN a bathroom, but they do at least try to find some privacy, and normally it's no problem .... but then when you've got some drunk girl trying to sneak up on you and then popping out and looking, and you've already started going by the time you hear her and you can't just cut it off ... sort of removes the point of the effort.
I'm not a big drinker myself, but even I don't get my BIL & BILBM. They drink purely to get wasted drunk. I don't see the point, and after the last couple times of being around them, now OFHG & TFYO don't like their drinking style either. When you drink like they do, you get all stumbly, mumbly, and eventually sick if you don't play your cards right. I like to drink a few, while talking, maybe playing a game and in general having a good time. Just to get that lightly buzzed feeling. Once I've reached that, I'm done, because I feel good, I'm relaxed, and I'm having a good time. Then, also, everybody's young, so I don't know that they've learned their limits or thresholds yet either ... or at least some responsibility about it.
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cntlvmenuf said on Oct 10, 2009....
It sounds like BIL & BILBM drink to escape their issues. I personally believe there is such a thing as premeditated drinking....the two of them drink in order to act the way they have no courage to do when they are sober...then they can blame it on the alcohol! No wonder ur BIL chooses to turn a blind eye to BILBM and blame it on everybody else....coz if he holds her accountable for her drunk actions, then he too would have to be held accountable for his drunk actions...and not the alcohol.
Y'all are doing the right thing by not drinking with the two of them....and if you were to ignore their drunk actions also, then you will really have them confused. The two get drunk to seek attention, if nobody gives a hoot about them, they are eventually gonna realize their antics are not working anymore...and get over themselves.
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mixednuts said on Oct 10, 2009....
we all need a drink now! :0} he,he,he -
Hegemone said on Oct 10, 2009....
Cnt - I agree with you that BILBM drinks for those reasons, but I know my BIL doesn't fit into that category. It's so weird with him because he acts the same way as he normally would, only he slurs his words and stumbles a little more. I think the reason he won't hold her accountable is because she'll bitch, moan, whine and make his life hell ... and he's afraid of losing her again. I'm hoping that by ignoring them and removing them from the drinking equation will help a lot, it's just time to move on.
Mixed - Heh, yeah, sort of.
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UnicornForm said on Oct 12, 2009....
hmmm i dnt mind a little drunken horniness but what u described id have to tell her to act like she got some morals.but i have a freind who sorta acts like her, andI just accept its her, but its HER, im not resposible for it thats for sure.but sometimes i do step in when shes hopped th fenncce -
Hegemone said on Oct 12, 2009....
UF - Right, see even if she'd at least take responsibility and understand that sure, while she CAN be that way, that doesn't mean others have to be comfortable with it. -
UnicornForm said on Oct 12, 2009....
Yea idk sometimes im more worried about me bein comfortful with me .But some people dont understand they irk the shit out of someone
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