I neglected my wife of 7 years and give little time to my kids.  The result was the title of my post.  Now I am confused about what to do. I recognize the fact that I need to change my ways.  I bought some books, read, soul searched and I realize that my insensitivity and selfishness caused these feelings and I am fully prepared to engage with her and work this out.  The problem seems to be that she does not want to work it out.  I don't believe she is cheating, I think she is scared and is afraid of opening up and getting hurt again.
Now my questions, do I push my way in and go over the top paying attention to her or do I play it cool and let her work it out?  I keep reading conflicting posts and articles.  The articles are hard to judge because many of them are trying to sell something.  I know she needs to come to grips with all of this and make the choice on her own, but its been a couple months and the waiting hard. I feel closer to her now than I have in years, but she barely wants me around.