Anonymity solves such issues, but is boring. Although a new identity of sorts develops, there's far less sense of credit, of accomplishment. Who accomplished what writing? Great, I've got all these people reading, but I'm absent from the picture. I'm unable to attend my own party, for cripessakes. Etc., etc., etc.

The only complete solution is to cease desiring expression. Is that a tolerable living proposition? Is it even possible? The strong desire for such sweeps over me, but I know in three minutes the desire to be known may overwhelm and overturn said direction.

Perhaps a less severity solution is to make the effort to create a new account for each post, so there's no continuity of anonymous identity. And you never look back - never see if anyone read, never see if there were comments. You expressed, but weren't attached to any possible results thereof. You took a shit, and hopefully wiped reasonably well, and flushed, and it was good. It served the purpose of need to express. But being free from the need for credit in any form, it's one hand clapping, the tree falling in the wilderness, etc. Whatever becomes of those turds is irrelevant.

That could very well be the way to go. Because any form of identity, even this anonymous kind, risks clinging thereto, and agonizing over whether said identity is being acknowledged, received, etc. The mania of identity steals priority from need to express.

It's just one of those restless days, where nothing satisfies, everything haunts. And, most of all, nobody gives a gravity-defying fuck.