Master has asked me to write about the growth i have undertaken since i first became His all those months ago.
as it turns out, this is my 91st post on Soulcast, and my second post ever is the one He's asked me to refer to.
so. with 90 posts and some 8 and a bit months, what's changed?
First of all, there are now 14 slave positions that i know and use, both with Master and by myself in the morning, where previously there were 4. the positions themselves have been altered and worn in, i've gotten lazy in places (Master never lets it slip though, and i've been working hard to get them back to perfect where i was literally terrified to put a foot in the wrong spot). i think that shows how much w/We've grown together as a couple. something that was foreign and new has become a main part of o/Our BDSM 'routine', they've been adapted to fit Master's desires and my growing sense of self and confidence.
so.. without further ado, the 14 slave positions and how they make me feel now compared to way back when. apologies if i get teary!
kneel- back arched, hands clasped behind back, kneeling with knees apart, feet together, head up unless instructed.
ahhhh. my love. my home. kneeling at Master's feet, i feel proud, happy, alert. kneeling alone, my mantra swirls in my head until i'm spinning in a happy warm submissive mindset. it isn't waiting for anything but a joy in itself. it's enjoying where and what i am.
inspection- standing, legs wide apart, hands clasped behind head, looking down.
excitement. what's coming next? is He going to make me cum again? how close can i get my knees without Him noticing? very tuned to His body language and tone, making sure i hold myself so He can easily do whatever He wants to. reading back, it's amazing how terrified and insecure i was. i know that He's only looking at the good things in His pet, that He'll correct anything that i've done wrong.
present- on all fours, stretched forward with forearms, forehead and chest on the ground, knees apart.
still the sexiest position. contentment and happiness come with holding it. depending on the situation i'm either biting my lip to keep from being too loud out of pain induced pleasure or biting onto the sheets to keep from groaning too loud from pleasure! really though, it's the position where i really feel like i'm offering myself completely to Him. saying, this is Yours, do whatever You want with it, if it pleases You. that's an amazing dizzying feeling.
access- standing, legs wide apart, bent at waist and leaning as far forward as possible, hands clasped behind back.
haven't used this one in play much, although it's somewhat the same as present as far as thought and headspace goes when i'm in it. it's very much saying 'Yours'. though there's something just begging for a smack about it.
restrain- as kneel, but closed fists together and held above head.
very much a 'what's going to happen next' kind of childlike excitement. i love looking up into His face as the cuffs are put on, see instantly what kind of mood He's in and get a hint at what's coming.
footstool- as in kneel, hands cupped in lap.
haven't used this one much, usually i'm curled up at His feet anyway and sometimes He'll put them on me. this is contentment. it's when w/We're relaxing after a session or when w/We're doing nothing at all. i'm so happy to just be there in that moment.
down- on all fours, knees apart.
usually this comes when i'm waiting for something- for Him to retrieve a toy, or collar. i'm usually trying to keep still and resist the urge to kiss His feet or something like that. He sometimes drags me by the hair and i crawl from this position, in which case it's complete terror and arousal and confusion mixed together- 'what's happening to meee? this is so hot!' haha.
half bridge- kneeling, legs together unless instructed, stretched back to lay back and torso on the ground, back arched, arms outstretched above head.
mmmm. i feel so yummy in this position, it's a great stretch and is really offering myself to Him. He can (and does) touch me all over, can pinch and scratch and pleasure.
present (item)- kneeling, holding it up above head (if possible), head down.
i love doing this. especially if w/We're out in public and it's possible to present it properly, like at a munch or play party. simply doing it at home is lovely too, i feel so great when He isn't expecting me to do it (maybe He's testing me?), but i feel like it's appropriate and want to do it. it very much seems to enforce to me how much my submission is a part of me, how His Dominance is a part of Him.
clutch- from present, arms brought back underneath body to hold ankles, forehead and chest on the ground.
have used this one a few times, and it takes me somewhere else when there's bondage involved. just hearing the click of the clip holding the wrist and ankle cuffs together sends me right away. thinking how to hold it to best please Him, depending on what He's doing.
full bridge- as in kneel, leaning back with hands on the ground behind, back arched.
only used this in play once, so it brings back the best memory. it was one of the first times i've ever cum from pain alone. Master hit me with an open hand on the top of my thigh while i was in this position so hard, leaving a perfect red and white handprint, and i was writhing on the ground for a good 10 minutes afterwards.
in your place- as present, kissing His foot once, before leaving forehead on His foot.
quickly becoming my favourite place to be. when i'm in subspace i'll do this pretty much automatically without being asked to, it's just an expression of how happy i am to be at His feet and to be His. it's showing Him how grateful i am. it's a part of my goodbye ritual also after He's left, to keep me in a submissive happy mindset.
throat- laying on my back on the bed with head slightly over and back, legs together unless instructed.
mm. dirty. *giggles* wonderful position for cock/ass worship and deepthroating. He can touch me almost everywhere while doing these, can also spit in my face, slap me, etc. this one tends to go with the rougher scenes and has those type of raw dirty submission that go with it. it's almost like an objectifying pose- just there to take all He can give and to give as much pleasure as He wishes.
receive- kneeling, hands over breasts, holding them up and together, head up unless instructed.
this one is the same as throat in the scenes it's used in (usually the rougher ones and roleplay), so the same thoughts and feelings go with it. very much feeling sexy and like an object, ready to beg for cum or pleasure myself for Him to watch.
as a person, i've grown into somebody who's more self confident and trusting, both of herself and of her Partner.
as a submissive, i've grown into one who's more giving, more completely owned than she thought was possible, more ready to do anything that's asked, more confident and less self conscious- more focused on Him, His wishes, desires and preferences.
a thank You, to the Man who has made all of this possible.
i hope this task pleases Master and is informative to those of you reading along.
