Things are hard for Daddy right now and i know it. He is really struggeling with financial stuff and personal stuff too. Since the robbery He even more doesn't want me to work, but we don't have a choice right now. He's looking for a seccond job, that's what He wants to do. But it's hard to find a decent one right now. There's no real D/s anything going on in our lives. That's hard for me. I feel lost and unwanted. i KNOW that's not the case, but it is how i feel. I have talked ot Him about it, but He's just too overwhelmed with everything else to fix it. i don't know what to do.
It's not like it's all His fault or anything, and i don't feel it is. I just have this sense that He has to fix it. You know what i mean? He's daddy. He's my Master. It's irrational and unreasonable. Feeling this way gets me all edgy and i get mad at Him and blame Him for stuff and it only makes it worse because then i am adding to the stress. I feel like a total little kid here. I throw a fit to try and get what i need then i feel like crap when i don't get it. The difference is, right now, i don't get it when i just ask either. He just doesn't have anything to give.
I know we'll make it through this. It's been 21 years and nothing yet has managed to destroy how much we love one another. It's just a hard time right now.
