Haiku?  Me?  You?  DUCKS.

Finally, some peace and quiet.  Here I lay, I rest.  I'm...

Not a roasted duck.  No, I refuse to be a pleasant apertif.  I am not from France, nor am I a butler.  I cannot fail, no.  I cannot refuse a gentleman's services, no.  I cannot deny myself... yes. 

I am.

Fuck.