What do you think about when you're not thinking? I mean, our brains have to be thinking about something at all times; otherwise, they wouldn't work right. It's not like they get up and say, "I'm going to Maui for a vacation." They can't do that. They are brains! They're stuck inside our skulls. They can't go anywhere we don't go.

When I am not thinking, "I have to do this," or "I have to do that," that's when my mind drifts off to daydreaming, to thoughts of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I think of the people I love. I think of little things, too, meaningless little things. I think of shopping. I think of writing. I think of what my life could be like tomorrow, even five years from now. I think of the future I want to have versus the future God wants me to have. God's plans are more important than mine. I know that. I accept that. I also know what He has in mind for me is probably a thousand times better than anything I could dream up.

Most of the time when I'm not thinking, I'm praying, or thinking about God. Thinking about Jesus. Trying to make sense of what I read in the Bible. Scripture is not something you can take at face value. It confuses me sometimes. And other times, it's crystal clear. I understand, for example, that love is the most important thing in the world. It even tops faith and hope. If you have love for yourself and others, then you will eventually have faith and hope too. Or at least I think that's how it works. Maybe it's automatic. I don't know.

My mind is filled to the brim, and I know there will be more thoughts tomorrow and the next day and the next. These new thoughts will replace the ones before them. The old thoughts will fade, or maybe not. Maybe they'll stay with me for a whiile, maybe even for the rest of my life. If I write them down, they probably will stick.

And that's the way it should be, don't you think?