Problems are like a tree full of monkeys. Some of you may think, "Oh, how cute! I've always wanted a tree full of monkeys!" You couldn't be more wrong if you tried. Monkeys can be very mean creatures with some very nasty habits. I can't even begin to describe the absolute horror of a tree full of them. May the almighty spare me of such a horrible experience. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that, figuratively, when life is treating you unfairly, it's similar to standing in front of a tree full of monkeys. The monkeys (which represent your problems) notice you standing in front of their tree and they want to give you lots of trouble. So they do what the characteristic annoying monkey does, they start throwing their feces at you. Your thinking, "Wow, that would really suck!" Well, it would. Imagine hundreds of monkeys throwing their crap at you. That is a really bad day. Or maybe on somewhat good day you have maybe ten monkeys throwing crap at you. This still sucks, but it will eventually taper off because monkeys can only produce so much crap before they implode.

There are a few ways that you can react to this: You can attempt to attack the feces-throwing monkeys by trying to climb the tree and BREAK THE STUPID MONKEYS' NECKS!! But this will fail in the end because monkeys, like your problems, will always be out of reach of your clutches of sudden death by disfiguration. You can ignore the monkeys (problems) throwing feces at you. This is also a flawed plan because eventually you are going to be buried up to your mouth in monkey crap. Yeah, let's not go any further. Monkeys will never go away as problems will never just resolve themselves. In my opinion as well as the opinions of many others, the best way of dealing with monkeys (problems) is to confront them headon. Seriously, are you going to just stand there and let monkeys throw their shit at you?! I sure hope not! There are a few ways to go about confronting monkeys (problems). You can either use your own weapons and techniques (which is always the best way), or you can attack the problem in the same way it was attacking you. To put these examples into the perspective of the analogy, I shall write out some examples. In solving problems using your own weapons and techniques you just bust out your 9 at pop each and every one of those annoying monkeys in the face. You can also use a flamethrower and bar-b-que those S.O.B. 's out of the tree. Whichever method you choose, it should reflect how angry you are at the monkeys (problems). You might even goes as far as blowing the freakin' crap out of the tree with your trusty tank. The other method, which was attack the problem the same way it attacked you is also easy to visualize. You just throw your feces right back at those pesky monkeys! If you knock one out of the tree, chase it down and begone with it because monkeys (problems) are easier to deal with individually.

Whichever method you choose, you'll notice that those stupid monkeys (problems) will eventually disappear and you'll never have to worry about them again. I hope this was helpful and perhaps slightly entertaining to you all. Talk to you later.

Oh crap, I can't believe I forgot to mention this. You don't have to take on a battalion of feces-throwing monkeys by yourself! Your true friends will always be glad to aid in your crap-throwing counter-offensive (problem solving). Okay, I'm done now. Goodbye for now.