Queenparanoia and I were chatting today, and the subject of jealousy came up. In that conversation, I related to her that I was a little jealous of everyone, including her, who was able to garner attention. Now, I know that may sound like I'm shallow from only those few sentences, so please, hear me out. As a long time student of human nature, academically through four separate colleges, many years of personal research, and vast personal experience and experimentation, I can confidently say that everyone, no matter who they are or how they respond to the subject, desires attention. I am no different.
For many years in my past, I was intensely jealous of any attention another person attained. Several years ago, I had to face the fact that it was generated from my own internal conflicts and lack of self esteem. When I finally acknowledged this harmful trait in myself, I was able to let go of this jealousy, and genuinely appreciate the successes and attention obtained by others. But not completely.
You see, as I related to qpdoll, a little jealousy can be a good thing. It causes me to strive to connect with other people. It causes me to try and excell in what I do, because I enjoy the praise from others of my accomplishments. It causes me to continue to seek, continue to strive, continue to learn, continue to connect, not because I begrudge others attention or success, but because I desire recognition myself.
A little jealousy, as long as it does not consume a person, is a good thing I think.
What about you? Is jealousy good or bad? Are you a jealous person?
