• secretlife said on May 07, 2009....

  i believe there's someone for everyone, and multiple someone's for most-
  when you get to my age and you look back on your life and your youth, you begin to realize that love doesn't really happen all that often in life-  that means either not everyone can be the love of your life, or else we need a break between loves for some reason.

• phoeby said on May 07, 2009....

  i believe in soulmates, but i believe that there are people who cross your path for change purposes, for experience purposes for the experience of a particular thing/event. without the negative there might not be the possibility of experiencing the lushness of positive.
  
  
  soulmates can come and go, some stay for a while, some for a lifetime. some you can't get rid of no matter how hard you try. (like my slutty bf) stuck like GLUE i tell you.  
  
  
  but i have to say im so OVEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRR this and im so ready for a loving experience with a guy.
  
  
  screw change, i say. i want nice. calm loving, consistent... i want a guy who's like a damn tree!!!!! 

• uniquely-ironic said on May 07, 2009....

  I used to believe in a soulmate, I'm not sure now.  I think for some people there is only one, for others, they either have more than one, or many who are almost soulmates and very compatable.  But that's just my opinion.  Nothing solid to prove or disprove it.

• beyondtheveil said on May 07, 2009....

  diabo- I don't believe in destiny because most view it as predestination, as at birth one's life is laid out for them. I believe in it only as a realized inner purpose. And two parts of the same soul is a romantic fantasy.
  
  Soulmates is one of those words with many descriptions and emotional responses. For me, a soulmate is some other with whom you share a true and unbreakable love,  with both incapable of betrayal of any kind.
  
  I don't know what causes two people to find each other and enjoy a soulmate life, but I would suggest we encounter many in our lives that don't get the chance to find each other for many reasons - kind of like the "two hearts passing in the night" passage.
  
  I've been lucky enough to have had my description of a soulmate for over twenty-five years, but it took each of us a divorce to find one another.
  

• diabolicdame said on May 07, 2009....

  SL: Yeah thats the thing.. not everyone can generate that response.. maybe it is just a matter of needing time between loves to heal or something.. I didnt think of that!
   
  phoeby: A tree.. lol!! Yeah I can completely understand.. and I love the bit about people coming into our lives to give us a particular experience.. no positive without a negetive.. very true! I hope you find your tree soon!  :-)
   
  uni: Yeah maybe there are more than one.. but still it wouldnt be every person who simply fits the description.. it would still be some special people I guess. The 'one' thing does seem impractical.
   
  btv: Yeah I agree with the bit about destiny and the split-soul thing. That concept of destiny evades personal responsibility.
  A true and unbreakable love.. just what I was trying to say.. thanks!! People who find a soulmate love are indeed lucky.. and yet I wonder if the two hearts passing in the night dont also meet eventually.. something like the soulmate love should be attainable to all.. in an ideal world atleast I suppose.

• travelr712 said on May 07, 2009....

  i had the fortune to meet my soulmate. we were separated by an ocean, but that didn't matter. i never met her in person, isn't that strange?
   
  so my question is, can you have more than one soulmate?

• Hegemone said on May 07, 2009....

  Umm, I'm on the fence with this on any given day, I've explored both the chemical possibilities as well as the spiritual.  I'm beginning to think it has a lot to do with each individual's perspective in relation to another's.  Further, maybe it depends on how much each individual has thought about this.  If you're willing to agree with the fact that it's spiritual and that true love exists, then you believe it and you look for your soulmate and sometimes think you found them.  If you're willing to go even further, maybe you believe that there is a partner for each person, but it might not just be based on spiritual reasons.  Then even further than that, maybe you believe that everybody does have another human who will compliment their existence, but it has more to do with carnal or biological needs more than anything else.  This is a tricky thing, definitely something that could be one of those epic, unanswerable questions.

• wishyouwerehere said on May 07, 2009....

  DD - I still hold my belief in soulmates, but like Trav, I also think there's potential for more than one depending on where you are in life, and how you've changed or evolved.
   
  "You cant make yourself really lurrrve someone if you try."  Been there, done that - wish that worked. 

• queenparanoia said on May 07, 2009....

  diabolic: interesting post. and yes i belive in soulmates... it's actually more simplier than what science explins. because there are no words to explain it... ;-)

• moonriver said on May 07, 2009....

  moon fu-tzu say, me believe in soulmate.
  my problem right now is if soulmate believe in me. lol
  me write something on this issue, about a century ago. here...
  
  

• travelr712 said on May 07, 2009....

  trav san-chu say
  when moon fu-tzu speak
  mantis pray... :-P

• GrapeKoolaid said on May 07, 2009....

  Of course every shoe has a pair...  :)
  
  But I don't think everyone's meant to find theirs... 
  
  I will echo secret and say that it is indeed a rare thing to love and even rarer to be loved, so I don't begrudge people who settle in some way, having been guilty of that myself long ago. 
  

• mOOn_platOOn said on May 07, 2009....

  O

  I have a theory about this. Too complex to go into here, but in short I believe that there may be a "reincarnation" agent in our physical bodies (as yet unidentified) by which you might be your great-great grandfather reborn (with emotional traits from previous lives - not physical memories). But guess what? Great-great granddad multiplied himself and there could be another version of you running around, simultaneously. Ever notice how some couples eerily resemble each other? As if they had sought out the opposite-sex version of their own face?

  There's a whole lot more to this theory that ties up the paradoxes and loose ends, but as applies to "soul-mates" I think this could be one possibility - if you're into metaphysics the way that I am. ;)

  O

• travelr712 said on May 07, 2009....

  good stuff happens everyday
  bad stuff happens everyday
  when you add them all up
  you're human.

• CreativeWoman said on May 07, 2009....

  I used to believe in them.
  
  CW
  

• speaking_up said on May 07, 2009....

  We are souls...and we know each other from other times...and when we recognize each other, it is an instant attraction. 
   
  We are not humans having a spiritual experience, we are souls - having a human experience. 
   
  She or he does not have to be your lover...it could be your sister, your best friend, the man at FEDEX whom you can't quite pin point, but you know he just made an impact on you...
   
  Soul mates do not necessarily mean lovers...they are souls...and you knew them before, and you know them now. 

• moonriver said on May 07, 2009....

  trav -- yup, but only on sundays, man... ;-)
  
  

• Rand_Al'Thomb said on May 08, 2009....

  I have loved and loved true, 100% fallen before.  She was not a soul mate.  Hmm I have a friend that Ive known for over half my life.  On 90% off most topics we are so close that its scarry.  I can read his mind or he can read mine and if thats not the case then we just know each other so well that it doesnt matter.   He has the tact of a sledge hammer i have the tact of a fencing sword, both of us can get the job done but I may leave wounds and he may leave bruises.  Yeah he's my soul mate.  I love him like a brother.  Soul mates dont need to just have sex, they are as close as family or even closer.  Dont worry you have it right :-) there are soul mates.

• diabolicdame said on May 08, 2009....

  trav: No.. not so strange.. I can believe that.. being in a long distance relationship as I am, I understand how distance sometimes doesnt matter.. and I do think there could be more than one.. why not?

  hege: Tricky it is.. and yeah as we can see, each individual's perspective differs.. but I was trying to see if there is some common string in the matter.. something that we have all felt.. I agree that the extent to which you're willing to belive is as far as you reach down this soulmate trail.

  wishy: Yes I think as you grow and change, there would be a possibility of finding more than one 'fits' or soulmates.. or you and your one can grow together but people usually take up their own paths along their lives.. so there could be more than one, for different phases of life.. I think..

  queenP: No words to exaplin it huh.. actually it really is simpler when we just try to feel it and forget about the words.. 

  moon: Thanks for the link.. I've read it before too.. we dont find perfect mates, we try to grow them.. so true! Soulmate no believe in you? lol.. Soulmate needs a neon sign or something I think!

  trav: Dia Saraswati agrees with trav san-chu.. hehe..

  grape: I just want to believe that all the lost shoes find each other eventually.. I cant bear the though of some shoes goin through life without ever finding their pair! I do feel lucky to have found mine.. its important to count your blessings.

  moon platoon: Ah yes I've come across that theory before.. and it does sound nice.. and yes there are those freaky couples.. or we all turn into them given enough time.. hehehe.. but I'm still exploring how much I want to believe of metaphysics.. its kind of a part of my culture so I'm familiar with it but.. so many years of science have put questions in my mind. I hope you theory is correct.. would be such a sweet romantic fact of life!

  trav: Very true.. we beat ourselves up about the bad stuff but it makes life interesting.. just as imp as the good stuff I'd say.. 

  CW: Yes our opinions can change like that with time and circumstances and our own expeiences.. I wonder if you completely disbelieve it now..

  speaking up: Souls having a human experience.. I like that! As I said I'm still not a believer completely but  I like it.. yeah soulmates need not be lovers.. very true..

  moon: We're only human on Sundays? Dang!

  Rand Al'Thomb: Thank you.. I so want to have it right.. I think soulmates is a wonderful thing.. and yes they could be freinds.. not necessarily a lover.. its nice to recognise someone as one I think.. it enhances our life experience at that time.. someone to trust and love and lean on.

   

• phoeby said on May 08, 2009....

  i think the trick is to let go of attachments (to a particular someone or something...) and allow the universe to bring you it's gift through something or someone else who may be unexpected.
  
  
  i think attachments cause the most suffering here in human world
  
  
  x 

• moonriver said on May 08, 2009....

  psst, phoeby.
  i agree with you in a sense: we must let go of all attachments that no longer want to attach to us.
  except on one point.
  don't even think of lopping off my attachment to bananas, or i'll wreak a lot of additional havoc and suffering here in the human world... :-)
  
  

• phoeby said on May 08, 2009....

  you must be a secret little monkey i think. 
  
  

  i grew up with banana trees out the back of my parents house and flying foxes usually get them! there is a secret though to keeping the naanies safe, though.

  
  

  yeah, but then there's those tricky attachments that say they don't but do secretly. they try to attach in secret. buggars.

  
  

  oh fuck it. they can go too.

  
  

  i am calling in the military.

  
  

  moonman, have i told you today that i appreciate you?

• 11Human^Becoming11 said on May 08, 2009....

  Speakin Up... I love it. This is my way of saying the same thing. We are not physical bodies having a spiritual experience, we are spirit experiencing in a physical body. Hopefully that resonates with some of you. I absolutely believe in soul mates. This does not really have anything to do with a romantic relationship or sex so much as it has to do with experiences being brought to you as you need them, to push you along your path. Not to say the sex isn't really good. Destiny is constantly changing. It is not something we are born with predetermined. We are our own gods in the way that we control our freewill. Our thoughts and emotions have everything to do with how we experience our lives and the things that manifest for us. We all will meet many of our soul mates. Our brothers and sisters separate from our immediate family. The people that for some reason you where just meant to meet. People that define who we are and why we are here, as spirit. You could explain this as meeting souls that we knew in past lives, that remind us who we are. Remind us of love lost and found.
  There is another and very different side to this. You talked about being one of the same soul. Souls are created in pairs. A yin and yang so to speak. A way of balancing the universe. They are called Twin Souls. Many believe that we spend eons through many lifetimes separate from this person. They are the reason we keep coming back. It is thought that you meet this soul during your last encarnation here on the earth plane. This is the person that so compleats you that we nolonger need to desend, yes come down, to a physical body any longer. We attain our light bodies. Pure soul, pure love, the love of creator. There are many people awakening on earth right now. We are experiancing a mass consciousness ascention. There are also forces at play that would like us to stay where we are. I beleive that we are too far along for it to be stoped. Many of us will meet this Twin Soul in this lifetime. Keep your eyes and hearts open. Don't want it too much, or you might get exactly what you want, but it may not be what was intented. Let the universe have its say. DiabolicDame, you are serving as a lightworker. You are opening peoples eyes. Keep shinning your light. For any of you that this resinates with very strongly, you too may be being called to serve as a lightworker. It is a potental within us all. I will tag this page with 1111. It links to one of the largest and longest running posts in this whole site. Check it out, you just might find something out about yourself.
  
  I(we) are a human becoming. Help me(us) to become.
  
  Love, Balance, and Gratitude.
  Jones^Becoming     

• 11Human^Becoming11 said on May 08, 2009....

  It didn't tag for some reason... you will have to click on my name tag...
  live and love life...
  

• bluegum said on May 08, 2009....

  what i believe is when we are looking for a mate we can get real lucky and find someone that fits together with all the things that make a marriage, partnership whatever you like to call it, and it is what my wife and i have.though there is thousands and thousands of women that would be just as great to have met, and lived just as happily with, what i would call soul mates.and there are a lot that a marriage with would have been a poor marriage to a train wreck had we jumped over the broom stick .blue

• destinydiva said on May 08, 2009....

  this is and always has been a big thing for me, I'm bookmarking to come back and read and answer xxxx

• fragglesrock said on May 08, 2009....

  hi dd! coming in late on this..i don't believe in soulmates, i believe that we find people in this world that we are very in tune and in sync with and these people become our best friends and our partners.  i think that we all come across many people in our lifetimes and that the people that we are in tune with now may not be the same ones we are in tune with later.  as our tuning changes so does our ability to communicate on the same note as we had in the past.  that's why relationships are so damn hard.  people are always changing. it takes work to ensure that your own notes are harmonious with those of your friends' and your partner...

• moonriver said on May 08, 2009....

  phoeby, just be careful when you call in the military.
  if they're not careful, they can lop off too much.
  then we'll be left with no bananas. not good at all.
  
  you just did. lol. i appreciate you too, my friend
  
  

• destinydiva said on May 08, 2009....

  fraggles wow you just changed my entire thought processes on the subject :-) ....or gave my entire thought processess clarity.. or something like that :-)   it made me think of that poem, a reason a season or a lifetime.. have you read it? I'll leave a link for it for you later on..     (thankyou xx)
  
  dd, sorry I still havn't read this I just followed the link to fraggles comment and had to comment, but I'm gonna come back over the weekend when I have more time  :-) xx
  
  
  

• wolfafterurazz said on May 08, 2009....

  WoW ur very deep, ahhhh I'm going to say NO, I've been married for 33 years and it was sexual attraction in the beginning. You know she was hot and I wanted her and we grew together. Do we even know our own souls? aq soul is something that becomes prelivant after we die, can we evaluate our own souls? You raise alot of questions.................There are people from my past I'd still like to contact and see whats, what. People I was in love with but it didn't work out. Could they have been my soul mate? who knows? WOLFFFFFFFFFFF

• Psych-ed said on May 08, 2009....

  I never believed in "soulmates" infact I used to become infuriated when my friends would use the word to describe their relationships, my argument being "if that's the only peson for you what happens when they leave you?" But then I was a very pessimistic person and had never been in love. But when I started dating my husband it really did feel like it was meant for us to be together and I believe that there is a highly spiritual and deeper resason for us being together. So now I am more inclined to believe that everyone does have a soulmate or soulmates.

• diabolicdame said on May 08, 2009....

  phoeby: Yes the indian mytholody centers its concept of nirvana around letting go of attactchments.. it is supposed to be the thing that causes most pain.. keeps us bound to earth and earthly matters.. but I wonder if its possible to really let go of attatchments.. I mean it would take immense will power I think.. but it is the trick to being emotionally free I suppose.. let me know if you figure out how to do it!

  moon: Thanks for the warning.. I'm gonna stay away from those bananas.. you can have em all!  lol..

  Human Becoming: Everything you've said is what I used to believe and say before I had all these doubts.. exactly that stuff.. I've grown up with the idea of souls having a human experience.. I like how thats put by the way. That we meet each other.. form karmic connections.. and that defines how and when we meet each other in our re-incarnations.

  Theres a reason for meeting the people that we do in our lives.. some karmic give and take.. twin souls.. that too.. there was a time I believed it without doubt.. because its been ingrained in me by my culture.. but as I studied further and grew up, this wonderful theory seems more and more without proof. I still want to believe it but I have a lot of questions now. I completely understand what you mean though.. and it does resonate with me on some level.. if we are souls, it makes sense to have soulmates. I'll check out the post you mentioned.. thanks.

  bluey: Thats interesting.. you think there could be lots of other women you could share this with if you had to be with them? Thats another way of looking at it.. that theres no special person or anything but lots of them that'll suit you.. and sometimes you're lucky enough to find one of those.. and thats that. Quite practical and straight forward.

  des: come back whenever you want.. I'm glad you dropped in!

  frags: Yes I've thought about that too.. that we have this frequency with which we are vibrating in the orbit of our lives.. and at any given time, whoever our frequency matches with, they become our friendsw, lovers, companions.. but could there be a reason for our frequency to match with those particular people? It is true though that we keep changing.. we have to work at our tunings.. maybe thats all there is to it.. could be.

  wolf: Hmmmnn.. it always starts with attraction.. the first step.. 33 years is a long time though! Do we know our souls? If there is such a thing as souls, it would be the voice of our core.. it would guide our inclinations.. we might not know it but we would be able to hear it I think.. since we dont have souls we are souls.. if there is sucha  thing.. lol.. sorry if I'm confusing you!

  But as you said about the people in your past you still remember.. there are some people that 'stick'.. some people in our lives are certainly special.. call them soulmates or not.. but ultimately.. who knows!

  psych-ed: Ahh yes.. its when you meet that person that fits so incerdibly.. thats when you feel that there has to be a greater meaning to this! I know just what you mean!

   

   

• wolfafterurazz said on May 08, 2009....

  ahhhh I'm always in a state of confusion, thanks for the thinking questions.

• diabolicdame said on May 08, 2009....

  You're welcome wolf.. I never run out of questions.. lol..  :-)

• wolfafterurazz said on May 08, 2009....

  Do our souls take over a night when we sleep? Is that what makes us dream?

• diabolicdame said on May 08, 2009....

   wolf.. the question of dreaming is whole other thing.. I have just as amny questions about that too.. I mean is it just our brains arranging our memory and experiences and info that we've come across the day.. or is it something more meaningful.. something that happens for a reason.. some say its how our sub-concious or our souls sends messeges to our concious mind.. either that or its just random stuff goin on in our brains.. again, depends on what you believe.. because nobody has proven exactly why or how we dream yet..
   
  Sorry I'm anwering with more questions..  :-D

• Brunettebmshell said on May 08, 2009....

  YES!!! Absolutely, one hundred percent!
  
  
  I do, however, believe there are many "someones" out there for us. I believe you can fall in love more than once and be generally happy with one of those "someones". BUT, I do feel that there is that ONE person out there for each of us; the one you immediately connect with more than any other; the one who feels things the same as you do; the one when you find them, makes the rest of those "someones" look like mere crushes or infatuations. Soulmate? Love of your life? Inexplicable form of chemistry? Whatever it is, or whatever you want to call it.... you can only find it in that ONE person.
  
  
  Nice post diabolic : )
  
  

• wolfafterurazz said on May 08, 2009....

  I'm laughing at you!!!!! ur just as crazy as I am. OK I'm sitting here thinking, would you ever divorce your soul mate? If you get divorced then that wasn't your soul mate? How do you know if you found them? and why do people get divorced after many years of marriage? where they just confused? thought they had their soul mate? Hell you might be my soul mate? Psst shsss WOLFF

• mixednuts said on May 08, 2009....

  "Soulmates" is sort of NEW AGE. Do soulmates leave? There are people who seem ( feel ) very close to you. Is that a soulmate?

• mixednuts said on May 08, 2009....

  I think I found a "soulmate" on SC, but am I wrong, or right?

• MissMimi said on May 08, 2009....

  I met the one person I consider to be the closest thing to a soulmate that I've ever had about five years ago.  He's moved on and I wish him well, but he will be in my heart until the day I die.

  I truly hope I never find another person with whom I share such a deep instant bond.  It's excrutiatingly painful when it ends.

• bhalah said on May 08, 2009....

  what abaut to be unique, diferents and irrepetible, from the rest, did you ever hier this? i did, then ho is my soul mate?, maybe when im enoufh spiritual mature? this or next life? how many times the social sistem goes in same problems, when the love will become? if we steel so wories abaut wars, terrorism, many, or sex as much can we have? maybe there samewhere a soul mate for all of us, but there many problems in each lifes, to fine, and make blind us, if there are twins, haw many twins you have in your family, maybe isent for all, just for those ho are twins, the rest we have to work in others, and make us soul mates, is not easy, so we got to much work to do steel. Whom live them ego, to acept others ego? Im not so negative, but as you see the notices, where are that love we deserve, as a human beens, maybe samewhere over the rainbow... . And what abaut respect, who cares? thouse soulmates? mmm, my soul mate? i losted already...couse dident know who was, maybe same of thouse i thot i loved, but that time dident know abaut love...how respect, and become a love partener, see ya.

• Lucytorial said on May 08, 2009....

  I read this yesterday at work and am coming back to comment.
   
  Yes I do believe in soul mates, I also believe that people meet for particular reasons in life.  We all have a soul family, those people we are connected to by ways we cannot explain, people will cross our paths and we will feel that we have known them forever.
   
  I know that my husband is my soul mate, there is no rhym or reason for us to be together... why it works? not sure we just do together.  It fits and feels perfect. :-P

• RollingC said on May 09, 2009....

  Yes I believe in Soulmates....finding them is another matter.
  Rc

• crybabylu said on May 09, 2009....

  I believe in soulmates, I'm lucky enough to be married to mine.

• diabolicdame said on May 09, 2009....

  brunettbmshell: Thank you.. I like how you put it.. there are many someones and then that theres that one.. thats what I believe or like to believe atleast.. whatever that special spark is, you only find it in that one person.. its a beautiful thought.
   
  wolf: Omg.. now we have divorce questions.. ahhh.. maybe soulmates get divorced when their other soulmates show up, if there is such a thing.. and they wanna swap them for the other one.. lol.. yeah I think you're matching my craziness here.. lol!!
   
  mixednuts: Only you can answer those questions for youself.. but I suppose when a bond is so strong that it defies explanation, it must something close to a soulmate.. I guess.. maybe maybe..
   
  Mimi: Why does the most beautiful emotion also have to be the most painful? The pain you experience I think is directly proportional to the intensity with which you loved.. and the pain sucks but its a big thing in itself to have loved that way.. I think thats the silver lining of it..
   
  bhalah: I agree it is definitely not easy and there is a lot to be done.. and in the middle of our other life worries this soulmate business seems quite excessive.. but love is.. at the root of so many of our joys and sorrows.. it might take us time to get there but its definitely worth it! Thanks.
   
  Lucytorial: Soul family.. thats another nice concept.. I've come across it before.. in 'Messages from the master' I think.. and what you said about 'it fits and feels perfect'.. wonderful, isnt it? We should cherish our soulmates when we are lucky enough to find them..  :-)
   
  Rollingc: True.. finidng them is another matter.. but I suppose soulmates would gravitate towards each other at some point in their lives.. or my romantic hearts wants to believe that.. hehe..
   
  crybaby: Lucky indeed.. how wonderful!  :-)

• moonriver said on May 09, 2009....

  lucy and ddame -- i know i have a soul family.
  i even have a soul home with a nice soul kitchen, a soul outhouse, a soul sweet-potato garden, a soul banana grove, two soul dogs, and a lost cat soul.
  only thing lacking is a soul wi-fi link so we can find each other across the universe.
  
  

• CreativeWoman said on May 09, 2009....

  I keep coming back to this post for some reason and reading it again.  I'm not sure why except to say that maybe my soul is longing to find its mate.  I thought I had found it a couple of times in my life, but I was wrong.  I'm happy for those that have found theirs though.
  
  CW
  

• diabolicdame said on May 09, 2009....

  Oh moonie.. how predictable.. I already knew you must have a soul banana grove.. and stop lying about that sweet potato garden.. thats your neighbour's soul potatoes you stole!l ol.. hahahahaha.. :-P
   
  CW, I understand the yearning.. (((((hug)))))
   
   

• RollingC said on May 09, 2009....

  A soul wi-fi link?  So you can connect to the soul Internet?
  :^)
  Rc
  

• Lucytorial said on May 09, 2009....

  Moon well, all you gotta do is ask...
   
  *-}

• javadewd said on May 11, 2009....

  Yes... Does that make me biased? You bettcha!
  
  Would I trade her for $1M? Nope.

• diabolicdame said on May 11, 2009....

  javadewd, I completely get it.. she's lucky to have you too!! :-)

• travelr712 said on May 11, 2009....

  part of me hopes there is more than one dia. another part loathes the idea of finding and then losing another one. i guess the jury's still out about that one.
   
  a further question i guess would be, should you wait for that soulmate, or 'love the one you're with'?

• javadewd said on May 11, 2009....

  Trav -- A soul mate accepts you for who you are unconditionally. My wife puts up with my shit, and I overlook her misgivings as well. Together we are better than we are separately. Took us a while, too!

• diabolicdame said on May 11, 2009....

  trav, thats a very thought provoking question.. should you wait or love the one you're with.. hmmnn.. Mr. Right or Mr Right now.. thats difficult you know.. I guess you just live each day as best as you can, right? Theres no saying what'll happen tomorrow.. appreciate what you have.. but then again that beats the whole point of a soulmate, right? I have no idea!

• travelr712 said on May 11, 2009....

  that's true jd, that's what a soulmate does. so what defines a soulmate?
   
  it gets to be a viscous circle doesn't it dia?

• javadewd said on May 11, 2009....

  It's all in the motivation. I guess that's like saying, "It's all in the wrist," but it's true...It takes two to tango and all that cliche stuff...
  

• diabolicdame said on May 11, 2009....

  It really does trav! Damn it! lol.. :-D

• diabolicdame said on May 11, 2009....

  Java.. it takes two to tango.. thats very true.. and maybe when its the right time, we find each other?
   
  trav, u think 'destiny' plays a part?

• travelr712 said on May 11, 2009....

  so does that mean a person chooses who their soulmate is jd, or does being a soulmate choose you?
   
  still doesn't answer my question dia :-D

• javadewd said on May 11, 2009....

  Trav -- Without getting all spiritual on you, I think there is a global notion of fate, destiny, or something of the like. I think that's where "it was meant to be" comes from. It never does any good to push things along, but it never hurts to take the time and hone in on who you really are, where your boundaries really are, what you honestly can and cannot tolerate and things of personal character.
  
  I'll admit it. I've had my share of Miss Right Now's, and I followed that rabbit trail as far as it would seriously lead me. I've had some really interesting adventures and then again some really miserable duds. I always went into it with the attitude that "hey, this could be the one," but as the surface began to rub off, I found out that the prizes I had found weren't gold. Distance is a big one. Beliefs and morals are a big one (which is ironic, because my wife is a centrist liberal, but she's a Christian, too -- which goes to show that the two can co-exist in one person). Overall intelligence and social skills are up there, too, not to mention differences in height... Now I just digress... Dia? Jump in...?
  

• travelr712 said on May 11, 2009....

  well, i don't know dia. kinda funny you'd put it that way tho, did destiny play a part in meeting my soulmate ;-) but since we were never able to actually get together, isn't that more of a 'cruel joke of fate'?
   
  be as spiritual as you like jd. i'm a very spiritual person. i just don't like when people stuff spirituality into a particular 'god box' and then try to force everyone around them to do the same. you might also be surprised to learn that i'm a moderate, not a liberal. i voted for boy george both times. unfortunately, it didn't really come out about what he and his gang were up to till after the second election, and by then it was too late. if the valery plame thing had been known before november 2003, he never would have won. but that's beside the point...
   
  i find it kinda interesting that people label me as 'a flirt', like i'm doing something wrong. i know i flirt with some of the ladies here from time to time. i also, like you said, look at new relationships in a 'this could be the one' manor, but who doesn't? i usually find out pretty quickly whether or not they are, and then am open and honest about where i stand on the issue. usually people say that's the responsible way to handle these situations, and i think it is too. plus, i see an awful lot of people who flirt as much if not more than i do, and bounce from relationship to relationship much more than i ever thought of, including with people on sc. somehow tho, it seems i'm often held up as a cautionary tale. i don't know, maybe because i'm a little more open about it? maybe those doing the holding up are jealous?
   
  ok, none of that has anything to do with soulmates. dia? jump in...?

• javadewd said on May 11, 2009....

  Well there's a new twist. Never got too into the Plame story. Basically then, it would reason that the torture notes were payback, because it was a similar incident. Who did it really benefit at the time? Well there ya go...
  
  People give eharmony.com such a bad rap (hey, there's always chemistry.com -- like Rodney Dangerfield once said, "You go bi, you get a shot at everybody!"), but I took that test seven times in seven different significant parts of my life. Amazingly enough I was snake-eyes six times and my wife and I almost didn't meet at all. That's when I came to the conclusion that it wasn't all about me and my timing.
  

• diabolicdame said on May 11, 2009....

  trav, I think flirting can often be harmless and amusing more than anything else so I dont see the flaw in that neccessarily.. and yea you're right a lot of people do it.. a little flirting never harmed anybody.. hehehe.. I dont it says anything negetive about a person.. and a cruel joke of fate.. yes true.. but then fate is big concept and we're never able to see the big picture of it so we cant say for sure.. it does suck at time though!! Can we override it with will power? I wonder really..
   
  My question now is, what if I believe that someone's my soulmate but he doesnt.. are we still soulmates? lol.. yeah ok that one's not hypothetical.. my bf just doesnt agree with the soulmate theory.. grrrr.. lol!
   
  java.. I do think that 'its meant to be' does have some meaning.. an overall sense of fate.. I mean so many times you look back on something and get a feeling or serendipity.. the peices fit like a jigsaw puzzle and its too intricate to be random.. but also I think when the 'meant to be' kicks in, differences in height or political beliefs or whatever just cant stand in your way.. theres that irrestable magentic effect, right? Agains all odds kind of a thing? Thats what i'm asking.. because if there is indeed such a thing as soulmates.. it would be beyond our control and resistance.. it would have a life of its own, so as to say. What do you think?

• diabolicdame said on May 11, 2009....

  java.. whats this eharmony and snake eyes thing you talk about? I'm curious now..

• javadewd said on May 11, 2009....

  Seventh time around on eHarmony is where my [now] wife and I met. She was actually pick #3... The last one. The first one had ran off with her employer (never dated) and the second one was a fifth-generation Lutheran (who think Presbyterians aren't conservative enough). We talked on the phone for what seemed like weeks. I almost blocked her because she wouldn't show a picture (...and I refuse to date Chewbacca, so there has to be a picture!) and when we finally met, I believe both of our attitudes were "if this doesn't work out, I'm giving up for a while." Strangely enough we ended up being two peas in a pod. We've been pretty inseperable ever since. Our second year 'dating anniversary' is coming up on the 24th. We got engaged Christmas 2007. We're both in our 30's.

• travelr712 said on May 11, 2009....

  well, you put it very well yourself dia, can someone be your soulmate and not know they are? when i get into those conundrums about a word, i usually look for a definition because i start getting to the point where i'm trying to make it say what i want it to, not what it actually does. i ran across this comment on wikipedia under soulmate: One theory of soulmates, presented by Aristophanes in Plato's Symposium, is that humans originally consisted of four amrs, four legs, and a single head made of two faces, but Zeus feared their power and split them all in half, condemning them to spend their lives searching for the other half to complete them. i really like that quote :-)
   
  all the definitions i found seem to say that both people will know, both people will have that same feeling of 'soulmateness'. if they don't, i think a person has to use a different word.
   
  dontcha just love rodney jd? i just really don't like the idea of another man's whatever doing whatever to my whatever, so bi is out for me. i did try a couple dating sites a year ago, but not very hard, and nothing ever came of it. i'm in that 'giving up for awhile' state. i have several women friends, and that's what they're gonna stay, friends.

• speaking_up said on May 11, 2009....

  Trav..."all the definitions i found seem to say that both people will know, both people will have that same feeling of 'soulmateness'. if they don't, i think a person has to use a different word."
   
  Stalker, is the word coming to my mind.  I gotta guy I can't shake off...he thinks we were meant to be together - I don't.  At all.  Ewwww.  But try to convince him we are not soulmates...
   

• javadewd said on May 11, 2009....

  I believe it was the great philosopher Clay who said of bi-sexuals, "Heads... Hair pie. Tails... Balls across the nose!"

• javadewd said on May 11, 2009....

  Speaking, I recommend a stun gun. Nothing quite says, "Go fuck yourself" like 10k amps...

• speaking_up said on May 11, 2009....

  okay java, that is another thread all together...I don't believe we all need weapons, it makes a caotic society and just feels all wrong!  Not guns, and not torture weapons...
   
  But I do thank you for your support!

• travelr712 said on May 11, 2009....

  well yeah dia, stalker would be another word. guess it really does take both parties to equal soulmates, right?

• javadewd said on May 11, 2009....

  Hey, sometimes guys just don't take a hint... It's not that they are trying to be malicious, but sometimes by being nice to guys you can accidentally give off the wrong signals. It's always best to be direct and blunt when the moment. A punch in the nose is always a winner. He'll only think it's a love tap if he's psychotic, and that's a horse of a whole different color...

• travelr712 said on May 11, 2009....

  if you punch the dude in the nose dia, be sure to post the video, ok? :-)

• speaking_up said on May 11, 2009....

  It's like...you guys know me or something...
   
  For one thing, the guy was short.  Then he followed me to the club.
   
  I took care of business
   
  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ex0wdzDzPVM&NR=1
   
  You'd all be proud ; )

• speaking_up said on May 11, 2009....

  Trav...why do you keep calling me dia?

• travelr712 said on May 11, 2009....

  i'm sorry speaking, i was at school doing an assignment and got the screen names confused :-(

• travelr712 said on May 11, 2009....

  damn speaking, you got a mean right cross!

• javadewd said on May 12, 2009....

  You're an amazon chick? I never would have guessed...

• ipmat said on May 12, 2009....

  i dont ,people put on an act during a relationship
  soulmates get real
  

• Goose21 said on May 12, 2009....

  welll said secretlife..
  there is someone for everyone
  and there are multiples for everyone. Oh happy days.
  
  
  Love a chemical reaction..... lets see the scientists
  recreate that potion, they will be rich and where will thagt leave us,
  will we be spraying the people we want to love us ?
  
  Was it he greeks who had 50 words for love ?
  
  
  
  
  
  

• Voltaire said on May 13, 2009....

  I did to once, back then I was more of a romantic.
  Not any more however there is still hope.
  
  And, yes, it is a chemical reaction in your brain. Smell your bf, does he smell good without perfume or deodorant etc? If yes, your DNA's are a good combination.
  However there is of course more to it, like the immune system and bla bla bla.
  
  Is the coin kinda situation, 2 sides of the same "reality".
  
  Regards,
  Voltaire
  

• diabolicdame said on May 13, 2009....

  trav.. I like that little anecdote about zeus and soulmates too.. its cute really. And it makes sense that if both the people dont share the same soulmate vibes then you probably need to use another word.. but not if I can brainwash this vibe into the bf first, and I am a very stubborn girl! lol.. :-D

  speaking_up.. Oh those stalkers.. what a great example of the opposite of soulmates!! lol. yeah I've had some and its not pleasant.. thats why I now carry a pepper spray! lol.. love the video!

  javadewd.. a punch in the nose mistaken for a love tap?? lol.. Now that would probably mean he REALLY loves her.. hehehehe..

  ipmat.. yes people in relationships can be delusional.. it could happen.

  Goose21.. let them make a potion for that.. lol.. I love that!! Its a shame though I recently that they are actually trying to make a love-potion based on the hormones that act to make us fall in love.. I'm willing to bet they'll never get it quite right though! Or atleast I hope so.. that would be tragic! lol..

  Voltaire.. yes I'm quite aware of the meaning of him smelling good and other stuff like that, being a student of biology/chemistry/genetics myself.. and I love the way you put it that its a coin kind of situation.. two sides to it.. sums it all up nicely!

   

• Voltaire said on May 13, 2009....

  DD,
  I must say, I bet it's interesting reading!
  And the coin, yes it's great to use, so simple that everyone understands it.
  

• chola said on May 13, 2009....

  אני ניסיתי ויאגרה או סיאליס ?

  היה סבבה לגמרי

  אני זקוק ל תיקון מחשב באופן עצמאי חינם או שאני אזמין טכנאי מחשבים

• javadewd said on May 13, 2009....

  Hebrew. Hebrew. Hebrew... WTF? Who's reading this stuff??

• diabolicdame said on May 13, 2009....

  I cant read it.. translation anybody?

• 11Human^Becoming11 said on May 13, 2009....

  that was some crazy spam from Israel... funny links though 

• 11Human^Becoming11 said on May 13, 2009....

  this is what Google translate thinks it says.
  
  I tried Oiagra or Sielis? Cool completely, I would need to patch a computer by itself or am I free I'll have computer technician

• diabolicdame said on May 13, 2009....

  Lol.. yeah I hit google translate and got the same result Human.. I got spammed in hebrew! Thats a little cool I think.. hehehe..  :-D

• 11Human^Becoming11 said on May 13, 2009....

  I think I'm gunna start using that expression... "cool completely"
  
  

• diabolicdame said on May 13, 2009....

  lol human.. yes I think that would be cool.. err.. completely.. :-D

• speaking_up said on May 14, 2009....

  You all have it wrong!  That was our SC friend Alienated under his alt, he's coming out garbled because the term 'soulmate' is foreign to him and his god.  It just messed his typing skills for a spell.
   
  sorry, my baggage...peace and blessings and always,
   
  *smiles*

• mOOn_platOOn said on May 15, 2009....

  O

  Wow. Thankyou SoulCast. For through your auspices I've discovered MY true soulmate.

  oh *~*Golly*~* ..............

  O

• Goose21 said on May 15, 2009....

  was it the 234 carot diamond ring that helped you find your solemate. ?

• diabolicdame said on May 15, 2009....

  speaking and moon.. lol.. you two really got bugged by them, huh?  :-)

   

  Goose.. No ring.. No diamond.. just soulmate..  :-)

• travelr712 said on May 15, 2009....

  i like speaking's explaination the best :-D
   
  damn moon! didn't you say i was your soulmate? now i gotta go sit in my corner and cry! :-P

• diabolicdame said on May 15, 2009....

  Lol @ trav... :-D

• mOOn_platOOn said on May 15, 2009....

  O

  I'm the fickle sort when it comes to soulmates. I'm much more consistent in my taste in horniness.

  O

• speaking_up said on May 16, 2009....

  @moon...LOL! 

• diabolicdame said on May 16, 2009....

  Lol moon.. yes thats definitely more clear-cut for most people.. :-D

• m_itai said on May 24, 2009....

  טכנאי מחשבים
  תיקון מחשבים
  
  טכנאי מחשבים מקצועי ואמין זה הדבר הכי חשוב
  

• RainWolf said on Jun 14, 2009....

  Hello All...
  
  I haven't posted in here before, but I see my little Brother in Spirit has, 11Human^Becoming11 has. 
  
  I see some think of soulmates as a New Age idea.  Only if you consider Plato New Age, the idea in western culture originates there.  Other older civilizations write of this as well using a myriad of names, too many to recount.  The idea isn't new. 
  
  But there is a difference between soulmate and twin soul and from the posts I read above the lines are a bit blurred.  A soulmate is one with whom you share Karma and is a part of your soul-group and no that isn't a band.  *Wolf grin*  A soulmate can be anything in life to you; a friend, a lover, a relative.  What they need to be in this turn of the Wheel, this life, for you and them to move ahead in your soul's progress.  We generally recognize them from the deja vu experience we feel when meeting them.  I've been lucky enough to encounter 4 so far in my life.  A lot of times it will be one who was wronged by you in a past life and you get a chance to repair that pain you caused or it gets carried over to another life as they hurt you in this one.  That cycle goes on until there is forgiveness and then Karma's scales balance, neither side is left wanting.  A soulmate is generally on the same path as you or one very similar, so you have things to learn from one another as well as with one another.  It isn't always a romantic relationship.  When it is, it's very intense and life altering.
  
  Twin Souls or Twin Flames are another level.  Each of us only has one of those.  When we are first born here, or as it has been put to me, when we first start school, we are with them and then we separate to gather the experiences, wisdom, grace and love we will need to accomplish our soul purpose.  Oft times, one of the Twins lives and is guided by the other in spirit or we live in such diverse places we don't meet generally.  Now when we come across the Twin before we're ready, before our last lifetime here, the relationship is like the scariest roller coaster ride you ever had.  It's tumultuous, brings a whole new dimension to the word intense, and is short lived, usually ending in disaster.  It's best to find the Twin in our last time to be here, before "graduation" and we go to the next level of being, what ever that may be.  I won't claim to know, because I don't.  *l*  But I do understand it's quite a bit different. 
  
  I understand that most of us by the time we're grown, we can become jaded and think that a soulmate isn't out there for us.  Especially for those of us who have had relationships where we've been hurt so bad that we're left with physical and/or emotional scars afterwards.  We feel we lost the innocence it takes to believe in a soulmate.  Innocence isn't unknowing, however, innocence knows what is out there but remains unjaded by it. 
  
  As we think so we create the world around us, taking that into account, if you have a belief in soulmates, that faith (and real faith has no doubts) draws into your life that which you need.  Or that is what I've learned in my turn of the Wheel, and memories of other turns.
  
  Nice to meet you all... Peace & Blessings to everyone,
  Rain
  

• diabolicdame said on Jun 14, 2009....

  Hi Rain.. Actually being Indian, I also kind of wondered how new age this concept is.. because in eastern mythologies and religions.. its pretty old. What you described the the first para there about soulmates and their karmic relations is pretty much what I've grown up with.. except traditionally the theory goes that thats the one you will always end up with romantically in every life.. so yeah I've been familiarised with that as part of age old wisdom and mythology. The stuff about tein souls is new to me and takes some understanding.. but I get it.
   
  Ultimately I think its your last line that sums it up the best.. that which we have faith in draws into our lives what we need. Faith is the ket to many things I think. Thanks for sharing you thoughts.

• RainWolf said on Jun 14, 2009....

  Hi DiabolicDame...
  
  Although not Christian, the quote "there is nothing new under the sun" kinda fits in here.  Ideas, philosophies get recycled through times and cultures.  The lines between the two kinds of soul bonds, Twin and soulmate, seems to get blurred in a lot of the posts.  They are different, as each has a different purpose.  You're Indian?  American Indian or India Indian?  I'm American Indian, from my mother's side of the family.  Cherokee/Creek/Cree/Caddo.
  
  Remember, many myths have truths in them, come from actual events that change with new tellings, and become so fantastical that a logical person files it in the realm of myth, not reality. 
  
  Faith is an answer to many things.  We must become like what we are seeking; the qualities of that person we need to come into our lives.  That saying like draws like is very, very true.  Thank you for posting back, it's nice to meet you.
  
  Peace & Blessings,
  Rain
  

• diabolicdame said on Jun 14, 2009....

  I'm Indian Indian Rain.. as in Indian from Mumbai, India kind of Indian.. but that kind of brings me to what you said about myths having started in people's facts or experiences.. this concept of souls and re-incarnation even.. or atleast the concept of souls being eternal.. its so wide-spread throughout the world.. right from me here to you all the way over there.. that it actually feels like something that would have stemmed out of people's experiences. Interesting.

  Thanks for contributing to our understanding on that matter Rain.. its nice to meet you too!  :-)

• wolfafterurazz said on Jun 15, 2009....

  Doesn't your culture have pre-arranged marriages? and if so then the term soulmate what does it mean to you? Forgive my ignorance about your countries ways, I'm curious? Are you looking for a soulmate?~wolf~

• diabolicdame said on Jun 15, 2009....

  wolf... thats alright.. curiosity is good.. if you dont ask questions, you'll never know the answers! Yes the arranged marriage system is quite prevelant in India traditionally.. especially in smaller towns and the older generations. Even so when a couple marries, it is believed that they are each other partners for/ from all their seven births (we believe a soul has 7 re-incarnations). So in the case of arranged marriages I suppose your soulmates are found for you.
   
  Although if you factor in destiny to that situation, wudnt it bring you your soulmate through whichever means possible? Even arranged means? For example, my parents had an arranged marriage.. they liked each other but didnt date before they got married.. their parents met and fixed it up and they got married. Its been 25 years now and they are still very much in love and I've never even seen them in a big fight. You see? Life works in strange ways.
   
  As for me, I met a guy in high school, we fell in love and now its 6 years later and we are still head over heels in love.. hehehe.. he's my soulmate without doubt!  :-)

• RainWolf said on Jun 15, 2009....

  DiabolicDame... you are fortunate in finding a soulmate and remaining together.  *grin*  I've oft times wondered about the arranged marriages and if it was not fate stepping in many times.  Even for the ones that did not work out as well as your parents, perhaps there was some Karma they had to work through.  Just a thought.
  
  I meant no disrespect before when I asked if you were American Indian or India Indian, I certainly hope none was taken.  *s*  I was just trying to understand from what perspective you were coming from.  :- )
  
  I think it's great how you share your culture, I wish more people would share their cultures with others; maybe if we all understood one another better, there would be more peace in the world. 
  
  Peace & Blessings,
  Rain 
  

• diabolicdame said on Jun 15, 2009....

  Rain.. offence? Not at all! I'd be just as proud being American Indian if I was! I respect people from all backgrounds equally.
   
  I like what you said there.. I've often wondered the same about arranged marrianges.. if we are souls, it is surely some karmic connection that brings it about I think.. even if it doesnt work.
   
  I also like what you said about us sharing our culture with each other.. I do this it would lead to better understanding and yes bring more peace. There is so much diversity within India that going from once state to the next can feel like a completely alien place.. but I have seen first hand that if you scratch beneath the surface, we are all more alike than we think.  :-)

• RainWolf said on Jun 16, 2009....

  DiabolicDame... good to know I didn't offend.  I too respect people of all backgrounds because it's the person you respect, and what they share of their life and culture that enriches the experience of knowing them.  I was an anthropology major in college but had to drop out for health reasons.  There are 5 disciplines or foci's in anthropology: linguistic anthropology, the study of the origins of language in humanity; physical anthropology which has to do with going on digs and trying to find the "missing link" between hominids (human like) and hominoids (in the human family).  Archeology, another thing with digging but ya unearth cities and oft times graves and that part always went against my grain.  I've always felt the dead are at rest, and should be left at rest.  For instance, there are more American Indian remains in the Smithsonian Institution than there are buried in the US.  Forensic anthropology, this is somewhat new but it deals with how a person has died and when.  And then my favorite, cultural anthropology.  You study ancient to modern cultures and how three things create civilization.  Religion, language and culture, in a cycle they go, spiraling ever higher.  I have always admired the acceptance of the thoughts and ideas of others in your culture, from what I have studied about it.  Yours is one of the cradles of civilization, the Indus valley.  It was one of my focal points of study.  *s* 
  
  I would agree that fate or destiny stepped in with the arranged marriages.  Also, I think when they got to know one another and became friends, a companionate and compassionate love grew and those are the kinds of love that warm people when they're in their elder years, sitting in their rocking chairs with grandchildren at their feet, listening to stories of when they were young. 
  
  Among some American Indian tribes, arranged marriages occurred, probably still do, but either side could back out if they didn't like the other person.  Gifts are given to the bride's family, and ceremonies held in their honor by the groom's family.  Not so different from European dowries. 
  
  Yes, under the surface, there are more things similar than different around the world.  We all seek someone to share our lives; we all seek to understand why we are here on earth at one time or another, if you look at all the major religions, the teachings are so similar it is astounding.  I read a book by His Holiness, the Dalai Lama and he outlined in an entire chapter how the teachings of all the great world religions were basically the same.  He went chapter and verse from every scripture he could find and it amazed me how much alike we all are.  Yet so much strife in the world.  That is the tragedy, not enough understand yet.  But I believe they will.
  
  Namaste,
  Rain     

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