I dreamt I was in ancient Greece playing with the gods, as a god myself. Living and basking in our suns light. I was enjoying the company of other such enlivened beings, and wrestling with the titans of our universe. Drinking the wine of Creation with the scholarly gods at noontime, and brawling with beings that had other such interests all through the afternoon till the sun set. As the sun went down I was finally feeling fatigued from the days play, but still in the clutches of battle with a massive titan. I was pinned. Sweat came from my brow, and my back was wrecked from the pain and the pressure. For the first time as a god, I realized weakness. It brought such immediate chaos to what I had known and enjoyed that I had a vision. The pain went, and on came a rush of every possible experience of weakness and fear. In that moment I realized the necessary dual nature of the universe. In a moment of weakness and fear, I appreciated and gave gratitude for the existence of the shadows that so effortlessly define the light. With the single expression of gratitude, I was released to an overwhelming feeling of balance. The god died, and I awakened.

I opened my eyes, looking up at the bare ceiling from my bed. Still surrounded by the feeling of balance. I looked down at my hands as I often do when I wake up; to make sure I am not still dreaming. I realized I was not looking with my eyes, and could not find any semblance of hands in the body of pure light that surrounded me. I looked around me. The bed I was lying on, ceiling, the walls that surrounded me, all gone. They were now replaced by stars. I looked with the singular eye that seemed to be in my chest, down to where my feet felt like they should be. It was then that it accrued to me that I was not surrounded by the light, but was the light. The shape that was human became a perfect sphere. Still looking down, I saw another sphere beneath me. It was Earth, only green and blue blurred together, as if it was spinning incredibly fast. Time was flying by me, and it didn’t occur to me to be worried. I was just enjoying the breeze it was making. I was unplugged from the matrix; stepped out of the camera obscura; plato’s shackes where no longer keeping me staring at the same wall (Ihde). A higher consciousness had awakened. After awhile I became aware that Earths spinning was creating a vibration. The vibration began to resonate from within me; the light began to dance about. The frequency from Earth became faster and faster. Mine kept up with it. We two spheres seemed locked together. It energized me, to the point that it felt like I might explode in all directions. In that moment earth seem to explode in size. I realized too late that it was not growing but I was falling towards it. My light flashed, and I found myself on the main street of my home town.

Not walking, but floating as a ball of pure light, over main street; everything was as it looked when I was a kid. I felt like I was seeing it for the first time, as a child. Similar to the way you feel when looking at trees for the first time with an opened mind. Everything was fresh and vibrant. You can feel the radiance that is that moment. I realized that the radiance and majesty had always been there but had been pushed behind the scene by the multitude of distractions that was my life. I looked down and saw that no one was moving. All the cars were quite. That balance I felt was truly in that singular moment. Time had stopped and the vibration from the Earth that had so energized me was the same as this very place and time. Once again, it never occurred to me to panic. It was not a rip in space that had caused time to permanently stop. There was nothing unnatural about it. As I floated on down the street, I began to see faces that looked familiar. I had no memory of who they where but it seemed as though I was connected to them; as if I had known them for a very long time. I was drawn closer to one of the familiar faces. As I got closer, a light grew around him. It was the only thing moving in a world gone silent. Hovering in front of this energized man, our lights combined and grew like a flame above us. I looked into his eyes and realized it was my grandfather. Everything began to move again, and I found myself following him running down the street. We arrived at a tall building, and I knew immediately where I was and why I was there.

I found myself hovering behind my grandpa’s shoulder, looking over the bed where my mother lay with a beautiful baby boy in her arms. All was in slow motion except for the nurses that bustled in the rounded hallways. I knew who the baby boy was, but no longer felt attached to his male spirit. It made me look into my new self and discover that I was no longer tied to any of the experiences of a body, or the pleasures of flesh. Time was no longer as I had experienced it before. I understood why I was not frightened me to experience it stop or speed up. I now had a grasp over it and could allow it to be as it is. Seeing myself cuddled by my mother with many loving eyes beaming down on us; made me understand or remember that this body was in good hands. The butterfly was freed from the diving bell. I did not suffer like Jean Bauby, as I was no longer tied to my body (Bauby). The higher self that I had become was no longer tied to that body or time. I immediately had the urge to wonder and adventure; to crawl out of the cave. Everyone in the room was emitting a white light now. It rose up collectively as a fire like it had before. I realized the light I was now made of, was the same as the source of all light. I jumped into the loving conflagration, and my light flashed once again.

The sun was just setting, but it was already becoming night under the thick trees. I was in the jungle of my dreams. I had long wished as a child to someday go hacking through some forbidden jungle in search of treasure. This was different than the dreams. There would be no hacking at vines, as I easily floated over the thick cover of the floor. I got the since the treasure I was in search of now, would be of much more value than any golden or jeweled trinket. A butterfly flew through a single shaft of light and caught my attention. As soon as I was aware of it, it was of me. It floated towards me; I reached out in a similar gesture to extending a hand. It landed on me, spread its wings, was surrounded by light and disappeared. In that moment I immediately became aware of the noise of all the life around me. It was deafening but beautiful at the same time. How I hadn’t heard it before was puzzling. I closed off my consciousness to only listen to the song. I could pick out each animal’s accompaniment and where it was coming from. All of them working together, but each leading and singing its own song. I opened up again to discover it was night and each noise emitted a light. Each animal was making noise in an effort to sustain the light. They moved around in patterns to bring light to dark places. I began to sing along and move to the darker places to spread my light. The further I went into the darkness the quieter it got, until I realized I was the only source of sound. I became aware I was being followed but didn’t know by what. I went quiet and continued down the path the darkness was leading me.

I came to a dark clearing. The only light came from the stars above and myself. There was a man sitting in quiet contemplation on a rock. He had bugs flying around his head. They lit up and danced amongst the positive vibrations he was putting off. The vibrations hit me as emotion and he and I began to light up. I moved closer to him to possibly better connect. A small echoing voice saying, “hello” rang threw me. He had not moved his mouth but I knew he said it. I asked back, “can you see me?” With his eyes and mouth still shut he responded, “yes.” I was immediately wondering why I was unable to speak to anyone else. Before I asked he began, “Not many people know what true unconditional love is; most are here to find out; some have come here from it; we are those people; I hope to someday become as you are, a body of light.” The words rang true, and he asked, “why are you still here with me, you have work to do.” He disappeared, leaving only his words echoing through me. I looked around, and I was in a different clearing.

I got the sense to start moving. I was still being fallowed, and the urgency for me to accomplish something was becoming overwhelming. I starting moving very rapidly through the grass, as if at a full sprint. I was being pulled and also chased in what felt like the right direction. I heard a cry of distress that felt more like the emotion than the sound. I stopped immediately, and in front of me was a woman. She looked up as if she heard me but looked right through me. She had a beautiful face, but it was dimmed by the tears in her eyes. I watched as her face turned from distress to terror. She had seen what was fallowing me even though it had eluded me. I looked behind, and saw a jaguar slinking closer with glowing green eyes. The woman screamed, and I instinctually flung the jaguar across the jungle floor. As soon as I did, the light from within me dimmed. Darkness crept in like a toxic gas from around the foliage. The woman’s cries went from terror to agony. I felt her ask for help, and in that moment I was flooded with light. Under the canopy it became daylight again. The woman looked at me finally with thankful eyes. I got a sensation as if my ears where ringing. A new voice came booming from within me, saying to her, “as long as you respect yourself, so shall we.” After the words ended, I realized they were from beyond me. I looked behind again; the jaguar was there with her glowing eyes. All I could see was her eyes. They turned into two balls of light and the jungle was gone.

I was struck and dumbfounded by what could be only described as beauty. It was a kind of beauty I had not experience in a material world. A feeling of balance came over me that I had felt before. Realizing the dual nature of the universe is what plunged me into my new light body, but this realization was something different. The same realization Plato knew, the soul and the material world were polar opposites, the same as good and evil, the same as light and dark. I the soul had descended to the material body form. I had been separated from the pure beauty that was the soul (The Body Social). I looked up and cleared my vision, as if rubbing sleep from my eyes. Still in front of me were the two bodies of pure white light. They had been watching me through the whole episode. The jaguar was never far behind me. I realized I was emitting the same radiance they where. Without a word said, I already knew what they had come to teach me. I appreciated and gave gratitude for the existence of the light that so effortlessly throws off the darkness. Duality had come full circle. With the single expression of gratitude, the two lights disappeared and I was released to an overwhelming feeling of balance. The true god died, and I awakened, staring at my bare ceiling.

Love, Balance, and Gratitude

Human^Becoming

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