I sat a long time staring at the predawn half light, then the sun as it began its ascension, at which my heart fell to its nadir. You see, I had spent 16 hours the day before, driving westward away from the only life I had hitherto known. And now my heart was crying, begging me to drive East, go home to all I had left behind me. I turned the ignition key and the Ford sprang obediently to life, and sat there purring like a panther eager to devour the road. The mile muncher! a rueful smile flickered briefly across my face at that! I let out the clutch and began moving, with all my will but much against my heart, turned westward once more, Toward Perth and a new life. And the sign said “Perth 758 kilometers.” “Well, two thirds of the way there! “Go back, go back, go back!” my aching heart kept pleading. Now the agonizing ghosts start their plaintive wailing. I see my lady friend clasping my hand and beseeching me through teary green eyes, hear again her words, “maybe you’ll change your mind, maybe you won’t go!” My two little ones crying and clutching me as I tell them goodbye. “Where are you going dad?…why? When are you coming home? I feel sick.
My darlin’ Susie left me for another man! She left me and I tried hard for a solid year to win her back.! Might as well have gone Marlin fishing with a ball of knitting yarn and a bent pin! The lady with the green eyes?….smile. She was a childhood sweetheart, and we met again by chance AFTER Susie took up with lover boy. Its true!…. we lived in a small town, it was inevitable we would meet one day. I promised her I would come back for her, but things went very wrong and I feel sick.
Adversity is the fire which tempers the soul and makes us strong.
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rupert7 posted on Apr 05, 2009
| views: 141
Comments
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Me-Myself&I said on Apr 05, 2009....
hmmm yup, that's a fact! adversity has ....purpose.
nice post Rupert, you are a good, sweet man. *smile*
have a good day my friend. take care ~see ya
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rupert7 said on Apr 05, 2009....
meme - thanks babe! don't think too many would agree with ya though! lol -
cntlvmenuf said on Apr 05, 2009....
ah..... reinventing yourself. Amazing how you can say a lot in just a paragraph... hopefully I'll catch all the other fragments as the story gets told in its entirerity. :-) -
rupert7 said on Apr 05, 2009....
cnt14 - ah there you are! you dropped of the radar - not reinventing, more like revealing! -
Hegemone said on Apr 06, 2009....
Rupert - At the very least it sounds like you've got a very seasoned and interesting past. Nobody is perfect, we all just try to do what we can, so I bet you're not as completely bad as you think. I think it makes a whole world of difference to at least recognize our errors and try to make amends for them, even if it takes you a while. So many out there don't even SEE what they do, have done or are probably going to do and they would if they'd take down their shield and not be so afraid of seeing how ugly they can be sometimes. -
rupert7 said on Apr 06, 2009....
Hege - I don't know if you have ever heard of the American writer Nelson Algren. He wrote a lot of stuff about the seamier side of life, prize fighters,junkies,hookers and so on. He was born in 1909 and did it pretty tough himself. I suspect his work mirrors his own life. I will never forget a book of short stories he authored. "Nelson Algrens own book of lonesome monsters" very gritty stuff. I can't help but feel that I would have fitted into it very nicely! I do tend to live in the past a bit, and have a real struggle with "what if" and "if only." I really need to heed my own advice! Anyway, my boys are grown men now and doing OK interstate. The younger one (Zac) will have his own child in July (a baby girl I'm told)
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