• inks said on Jun 07, 2006....

  Lesophomore, I don't think you should be angry at all. It is natural to act the way you did. I would have reacted the same way. So, "T" is the the person you are are currently dating? You are write to questioned why "T" would want to share you with anybody else and maybe you should ask him? If "T" really knows and care about you, then "T" knows you would never want to have a threesome. Or is just simply apart of "T"'s idea of foreplay? I think you should tell "T", how you felt about last night. If you have already. It's also natural to be attracted to another person, you know where your boundaries stand. How strong are your feelings for "T"?

• AnonymousVoice said on Jun 08, 2006....

  Lesophomore... T doesn't exactly sound like the best guy to fall for. Oh and what's happened with P and R? And how exactly did you start this... "business"?

• lesophomore said on Jun 08, 2006....

  This will be my first comment ever on my blog! Who knows when this started. Probably the beginning of my sophomore year in college. And I wasn't expecting to ever play around so much. But you date one older guy who treats you like a princess and suddenly all the boys you're surrounded by seem so pathetic and tiresome. So then I started to only date men I met in bars, and soon weeded out the ones without money to spare. I've gotten used to being taken care of, but there's usually no emotion involved. This guy T is just great sex. Deep down I know it. Yes, he's got money too, but his life is a bit too faux rockstar, and it's not really me. But he's just so gorgeous it's hard not to have a crush and feel good when you're driving around town with him. For now, there's no reason to ditch him though, because he's great in the sack, spends money like water, and he has a drug supplier. It's really a 20 year old's dream when you think about it. I think R and P are more of my pace, and truthfully, easier to manipulate. I think I should stick with people like that because it makes me less emotionally attached. So yes, P and R are still in the picture.

• AnonymousVoice said on Jun 09, 2006....

  Sometimes I wonder what it would be like living as you do, but I don't think I could do it.

• kelly said on Jun 12, 2006....

  I know this is going to sound judgemental, but I think you should get a grip on your life now if it's possible. The way it looks, you'll be spending a lot of time on the psychiatrist's or psychologist's couch in a few years. Your life is precious. Don't waste it completely on being shallow. [quote]I think R and P are more of my pace, and truthfully, easier to manipulate.[/quote] On the other hand, I think I'm wasting my time typing this.

• hotaka said on Jun 14, 2006....

  I knew a girl who dated a guy who had money to spare. She raved about him all the time and she was going to move in with him. One day she came to his house and found it surrounded by the police. They had been keeping tabs on him because he was a suspected drug dealer and had been present at a drug dealers' squabble where someone was shot. One person had been caught by the police and accused the girl's bf of the shooting. When she saw the situation she freaked and didn't know what to do. She circled the block once but decided she had to do something. She spoke to the police and denied everything they told her. She was allowed inside and her bf was freaking out. He was so scared of being caught and in tears. In the end she went with the police and promised to tell them (some of) what she knew of the truth. Her bf was not arrested but the cops would keep a close watch on him. The incident really shook him up and he decided to get his life straight. At least that's what she told me. I hope he was able to do so. Too many people in my home city and surrounds are getting shot each year because of drug gangs. That kind of lifestyle seems to lead only to misery.

• lidstrom82 said on Jun 14, 2006....

  If there's guys you keep around that are easy to manipulate and give you what you need, that's what works now. I think the sex, the drugs, the behavior now is a thrill, but it's nothing to base a life on. The question of why you didn't do the threesome is interesting. Was it wrong to do, deep down? You didn't want to share with anyone else? The cool thing is that you're sharing this with people in some form so that if you're doing something wrong, others are there to speak up and let you know. Too often these days, holding someone accountable for doing something wrong is twisted into "being judgmental". I don't think kelly and hotaka were being judgmental in what they said. Your lifestyle now will lead to misery and shallowness. Controlling others might be fun, and manipulating gives you power, but it's not fun at all when you're the one being controlled. Loving other people isn't sex, or providing drugs. Real love protects from the destructive things in life, and being truly alive is far from the life you're stuck in now.

• hotaka said on Jun 14, 2006....

  lidstrom82, I am pleased to know you, even if it's vicariously through Soulcast.

• SOLDIERCIPSWIFE said on Jul 25, 2006....

  I think Hotaka's scenerio is one you should take seriously. I did drugs when I was your age...then my friend got caught and as an example he got 3years in the PEn. I visisted him once. I cried so hard that I couldn't go back. I was carrying my precious little angel at the time and thanked god for 2 things. 1. Getting me out of the drug scene alive without ever going to jail 2. Not screwing up my body so bad that I was unable to have children. There is life after 20....remember that

• duaLife said on Mar 10, 2007....

  It's ok to feel this way. It's only natural, and even though you may have sex with multiple men, it's not all at one time, and you feel sex is something shared between two people. That's something to admire.

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