I woke up with one of those odd feelings of dread. The kind that feels like you know something is off and something bad will happen, but you don't know what it is yet. Well I found out what it was not too long into the day.
I got a call from my daughters school nurse saying she'd been hurt. Some kid pushed her down on the playground on purpose, and she tried to catch herself when she fell with her hands. In the process she broke both of her arms.
Only I didn't know they were broken yet of course. But I had a feeling it wasn't good. The nurse told me she wasn't crying, so it was more than likely nothing. But I told her that crying didn't mean anything with my daughter. She never cries. She's gotten hurt really bad in the past, and half the time she won't even tell us about it.
So this time when she got on the phone and told me, 'dad I think I need a doctor' I knew something was very wrong. So I rushed to the school and the nurse had put ACE bandages on her wrists so I couldn't immediately see anything. But she couldn't move her arms very well, and couldn't open the door or buckle her seatbelt in the car.
I called my wife to come home so we could take her to the ER and have it checked out. When she got home she suggested we call her medical group where she has a doctor and see if they'd see Harper. Harper doesn't really have a regular doctor cuz she's never sick.
Her doctor didn't see kids, but since it's a big group practice they set us up with someone who did see them. We were relieved cuz going to the ER costs a lot more money and we're flat broke at the moment.
So we waited around for the appointment time, and headed off to the place. We did all the papers and gave them our money. Then they take us back to the little room to wait. Then the doctor comes in....
He takes one look at me, sniffs the air, and asks me if I smoke. I looked at him like he was crazy and said 'what?' He told me he could smell cigarettes and that was unacceptable to him. Then he started ranting and raving and told me to get out. He wanted me out of his office and didn't wanna treat my child. He said he was gonna have to disinfect his entire office because of me and shut the room down for the rest of the day.
Now, yes, I do smoke. But I had one cigarette like an hour before we got there. And I fucking bathed that morning and am not a bum and didn't lock myself in closet and toke up a bong before we got there. And I wasn't smoking inside his goddamn office either. Or in my car. Or anywhere near my child or him. And last time I checked, smoking in my own backyard isn't a fucking crime is it?
And yet he actually ordered me and my little girl with two broken arms, out of his office on the grounds that he could smell cigarettes on me. He wouldn't even look at her. I stayed semi calm for a moment because I thought it was some sort of fucked up joke. I didn't think he could possibly be serious. And I asked him to at least look at my daughter and I'd go in the waiting room and leave my wife in there.
He absolutely refused and said I'd already ruined his office by existing in his airspace and I needed to leave immediately and take them with me. That's when I lost my mind. I'm not proud of what I did next, but in light of the fact I wanted to smash the guys head against the wall, I think I held back okay.
I picked up a tape dispenser that was laying there and I threw it across the room. I was pissed. No.....I was FURIOUS. Here my child was sitting there injured with two broken arms, and in pain, and this motherfucking doctor was turning us away because he didn't like how I smelled??? NO WAY was I standing for that.
But I threw the thing across the room and it broke some glass jars on the counter. And then the guy ran out of the room and called for security and my ass got hauled out of there forcibly. I really wanted to do some damage to the guys face and not his stupid glass jars of tongue depressors.
I've never been so appalled or disgusted or horrified at anyone in my life. Can a doctor really do that?? And if so, how the hell is that in keeping with his oath as a physician to treat people who are sick and injured? And we're talking about 9 year old little girl with two broken arms. She didn't have the sniffles or something. Some evil little boy put his hands on her and broke her arms, and then this doctor refused to fix her because I smoke??
Tell me how any of this is fair? I'm flabbergasted and in shock and still furious....
I eventually calmed down enough to be coherent and we ended up at the ER anyway, which was what we were trying to avoid due to the cost. But apparently we had no choice. When I told them what had happened to us, they were outraged and shocked too, and they took us back immediately. No waiting.
And they treated my daughter with concern and care and were nice to me too. The way it should have been all along. But the verdict was that she had fractured both wrists with the impact of the fall, and we're still waiting to hear from the orthopedic surgeon.
She may need surgery on her left wrist because some of the bones were knocked out of alignment. The right one appears to be in much better shape, thankfully. But they both need casts. And she can't do anything she wants to do anymore.
She can't eat or drink or open doors or brush her teeth or go to the bathroom, without help. And for the most independent child I've ever seen, this is torture for her. She's mad and she's depressed about it. And I can't do anything to fix it. I couldn't even get a doctor to see her yesterday, which just infuriates me beyond any words I could type.
But through the entire thing, from the moment it happened, until now, she hasn't shed even one tear. I have though. A lot of them. But I think she's a lot stronger than me.
What is wrong with people though? First the kid who did this to her, and then the doctor who refused to treat her?? This world sucks sometimes....
I'm too upset to even type any more about it :-(
