• fragglesrock said on Mar 06, 2009....

  oh sweetie! i know the feeling all too well! it takes time to heal and time to be able to be friends with a past love without feeling the longing...it will happen, i promise. and some loves? they never go away, some of them stay in your heart forever but the longing does subside. i promise you this. it's a rough road to getting there.  because one of the hardest parts about losing a relationship is losing a friend.  but give yourself time, you are a strong strong woman, i am positive that as time passes the painful longing will receed and you will indeed be able to be freinds again.

• Hegemone said on Mar 06, 2009....

  Queenie, don't beat yourself up, its perfectly natural.  For starters though, especially don't feel selfish for having to end the friendship.  That goes both ways, and perhaps being friends with you was a little selfish of him.  He could commit to you and stay in the romantic relationship, so he backed off and wanted to be just friends.  So he gets the best of both worlds, no romantic commitment, but still YOU.  That's not fair either, and there's no reason he's more important than you.  You're still in the healing process and if taking some time out of the friendship is what you need, its natural and I would say to go with it.  Take your time, get back to you, take baby steps back towards that friendship if you find that you still really want it.  It'll come little by little, you'll be OK, just don't rush (remember what MMI told you?) and you'll find that things aren't so hard.  (((((((((((HUGS))))))))))

• PAPERBACKWRITER said on Mar 06, 2009....

  
  <3
  
  ate papel ~
  
  p.s. sent you a pm, kapatid
  

• uniquely-ironic said on Mar 06, 2009....

  Okay, it was nice seeing you online this morning, but I'm glad I waited for my coffee to read this.
   
  Hmmm I think (and it's only my thoughts) that it's rare to be friends with someone we once were "more" to.  It's damn near impossible to be friends with them right after a break up.  It's just too close and painful.  You may find in time that this changes.  Time, space, distance are all good healers of broken hearts.
   
  You're not heartless.  If you were, it wouldn't bother you to know that you may have hurt someone you once cared for/still care for.  That means you have plenty of heart.  But, you're taking care of yourself and I applaud and support that.
   
  One of the hardest lessons I ever had to learn (and keep learning) is that no one takes better care of you than you.  It's not selfish, it's the way it works.  Period.

• CreativeWoman said on Mar 06, 2009....

  You are human, queen.  It's his loss...truly.
  
  ((((hugs))))
  
  CW
  

• mobil said on Mar 06, 2009....

  Our little Queenie is all grown up, life hurts sometimes. It's knowing that pain that allows you to rise to new heights Queenie. Don't be too hard on yourself.

• FaceUnknown. said on Mar 06, 2009....

  Omg sweet thing! The thing is I know how that feels, I'm just a young person but I realy know, I know what you are going through and I'm sorry this is happening to you. I mean it.

  Take good care of yourself OK??!! That realy important, maybe one day it wil turn out ok.. Try to do othet things and keep you mind on other things.

  I'm praying for you!!!

  Veryyyyyyyyy Bigggggggggggg Huggggggggggg

  Face. xxxxxxxx

• SlickNick said on Mar 06, 2009....

  I feel for you. I think we all have been in your shoes at one time or another in our lives. It's torture to be just friends with someone you really want more with. You might be sparing yourself a lot of hurt by moving on then you would if you were to be friends with him still. Have you told him exactly how you feel? Don't beat up yourself too bad because you really can't help who you are attracted to. Your sadness can be liberating because with every tear you get closer and closer to finding yourself and realizing that life can be fine without him. You are far from heartless because only someone with such a big heart would endure the pain of longing, to be friends.
  (((hug)))
  

• moonriver said on Mar 06, 2009....

  i know exactly how you feel, queenie.
  and i understand how you came to that decision.
  it's not because you're heartless.
  that simply isn't true.
   
  it's because your heart is so overflowing with love that isn't reciprocated, that you decided to turn off the tap completely, at least for a while.
  otherwise, you will be overwhelmed by pain.
  i would have done the same.
  it's a question of hydraulic engineering.

   

  psst. wanna piece of stinky tofu? ;-)

   

• wombat said on Mar 06, 2009....

  I'm sorry you're hurting, Queenie.  I understand where you're coming from.  It's hard to be friends with someone you have deeper feelings for, and stepping back just  might be a step forward.  They say time heals.  I'm not sure if that's always true, but if you don't pick at the scab, you can learn to ignore the scar.  And maybe you will find that place in your heart where you can change your feelings about everything, and learn to be happy for knowing you are a warm person capable of such love.  And yes, their loss!

  {{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}

  wombie

• rupert7 said on Mar 07, 2009....

  
  All I can add to all these wise words is this song. Like so many others, I have been where you are,it will get better.   {{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}
  
  
  

• phoeby said on Mar 07, 2009....

  no, i don't think you're heartless either. you seem like a very caring and kind person to me. those unreciprocated relationships are horrid and very painful. you did the right thing to end it. 
  
  
  lotsa love,
  phoeby

• dyingman said on Mar 07, 2009....

  A friend won't want you in pain.
  
  When you find someone to love you back, maybe look him up if he doesn't mind being buddies then.
  
  Sounds like you're doing the right thing.
  It's really no favor to him.  Some guilt may be involved.  "I'd like to love her back, but..." 
  
  Better to get you back later when you've got more of your needs in order and he can enhance your life rather than be an emotional obstacle to finding the peace you hope for.
  
  
  

• violetmountain said on Mar 07, 2009....

  its very hard to be friends with someone you still love. it's better that you stop communicating with him, and stop being friends for awhile, let time take its course...TIME HEALS...let it pass....you are still in the stage of pain and anger. but remember this too shall pass. you can be friends with him when you surpass the pain that you feel right now. for the main time, try to let go, and think of all the bad things or negative things that he did in your relationship, so that it will be easier for you to let go...TAKE CARE...GOD BLESS!!!

• husbandhater said on Mar 07, 2009....

  You are ONLY HUMAN Queenie. I would love to dry your tears honey. AT least you are big enough to admit and know the reality of the what you have declared above. If this helps you to heal then you are doing the right thing for you. And let no one tell you different. One of my very best friends and I shared a relationship long ago(Back in highschool) and I had to stop talking to him for a minute b/c it hurt so much to talk to him and he wasn't in a good place due to us breaking up.  I'm the one who ended things.

  He eventually called me up one day after sometime had passed and said you hurt me b/c we always promised  that no matter what happened btwn us we would "ALWAYS" remain friends and you pulled away from me. It got us to talking again and we are still friends today. I'm so proud of him actually b/c inlight of some of the things that are going on in his life he is trying to get it together and he is taking it one day at a time. You might be surprised Queenie.

  If it is meant to be you will be friends again.

• m1m10 said on Apr 01, 2009....

  Its okay don't hurt yourself or else, your not heartless
  your lovable there other friends and families loves you
  
  i understand how you felt, i was once same boat as you its very hard but its wasn't love its just a crush, the best thing is let it go and end it and will come back again as a friend with no feelings of love anymore.
  like karma remember there's always karma around us.
  
  like husbandhater said above from me
  
  trust me there million of men outside!!they're will chasing you!one person will love you the way you are!think of positive!!its possible! = )
  

Comment on "heartless..."

Currently tagged	sorry on being human love unreciprocated love longing platonic relationships pain human tears (Click to add tags below)
Tag this post	(Separate tags using commas, for example: New York, dating, vegetarian)
Your comment