When a person sets out to learn a second language typically simple greetings, numbers, days of the week, etcetera are the first things to learn. Next are simple present sentences, simple interrogative statements, simple past and so on until the student reaches more complex sentences and higher levels of grammar. A student’s progress depends on the student’s language comprehension ability, the study time to which he commits, his opportunity to listen to or interact with native speakers and his overall enthusiasm for learning.
Of all my students, only two are of a very high level where I can speak normally and freely, without modifying my speed or vocabulary. One of them is the head of a pharmaceutical research lab and is becoming a well-respected scientist in his field due to his published papers and appearances at symposiums around the western world.
He is also one of my most difficult students, not only because he needs more than daily conversation topics to satisfy his learning but because he has not learned how to disagree in a diplomatic fashion. Disagreeing with him is more like entering a debate, which for me makes the class atmosphere too tense. I offer two examples of debate-like conversations we have had.
Topic One: The student explained to me how mice can be treated for obsessive-compulsive behaviour by first putting them in a cage with saw dust and marbles. Mice hate marbles for some reason and will bury each one systematically in the sawdust until they are all hidden from the rodent’s view.
Me – But that’s not exactly a fair test for obsessive-compulsive behaviour now, is it?
Student – It’s a proven experiment that causes mice to exhibit obsessive-compulsive behaviour.
Me – Perhaps. But as I understand it, obsessive-compulsive behaviour is where people do everyday things but repeatedly, such as continuously verifying that they have their keys or cleaning things over and over. Based on what you told me, mice have an inherent fear of marbles and so they try to hide them all. It’s not exactly the same thing, is it?
Student – But this test was designed and approved by psychologists as an example of obsessive-compulsive behaviour. The mice don’t stop until all the marbles have been buried.
Me – But isn’t that a bit like, let’s say you want to go to bed but find someone has left a pile of dirt on your bed sheets. You don’t want to sleep on dirty sheets so you replace them only to find right after that dirt has appeared again. Once again you replace the sheets…
Student – But nobody wants to sleep on dirty sheets so of course they want to replace them with clean sheets. That is not obsessive-compulsive behaviour.
Me – That’s my point. If someone continues to clean the sheets after they have been cleaned then that would be obsessive-compulsive behaviour. But simply changing dirty sheets for clean sheets as often as necessary to ensure a clean bed to sleep in seems normal, even though dirt appearing over and over again is not.
Student – I don’t understand what you are trying to say. In this experiment the mice exhibit obsessive-compulsive behaviour and we can treat them with experimental drugs to see if they stop burying the marbles. If they do then we can set that drug aside and continue to test it as a possible cure for obsessive-compulsive behaviour in human subjects.
Me – But the mouse buries the marbles because it doesn’t like them. If you treated a person with this drug and they stopped changing their dirty sheets and accepted sleeping on a dirty bed would you say the drug had cured them of their behaviour?
Student – But wanting to sleep on clean sheets is not an example of obsessive-compulsive behaviour so we wouldn’t treat such a person.
Me – But it seems to me that for a mouse to bury marbles is a normal thing for a mouse to do so I don’t understand how treating a mouse for normal behaviour shows whether or not a drug is successful at curing obsessive-compulsive behaviour.
Student – But as I told you, this test was devised by psychologists and it is proven as a test for obsessive-compulsive behaviour. So we researchers use this as a method to test for cures.
Me – I just don’t understand how putting a mouse in an unnatural environment – one that is full of neatly arranged marbles – and watching his response can be a valid test for obsessive-compulsive behaviour. It is not normal for us to have to change our bed sheets several times before going to bed and it is not normal for a mouse to sit in a cage of marbles. If a mouse was repeatedly doing the same thing in a normal environment then I could see the test being valid.
Student – But this is a verified test for obsessive-compulsive behaviour and we use it to test or drugs. Trained professional psychologists have shown it’s a test for…
And so on.
Topic two: Israel invades the Gaza Strip; the history of tensions behind the Israelis and the Palestinians.
Student: So, it seems this problem has continued for generations and will not easily be resolved.
Me: I agree. Today’s youth on both sides will remember the deaths and the destruction and even if their governments agree to a peaceful co-existence there will still be underground movements to strike against their perceived enemies in the name of revenge. “Your father killed my father, therefore I must kill you.” In a way it is similar to the problem of Chinese and Korean enmity against Japan.
Student: You mean back during the war?
Me: Yes, the atrocities committed by the Japanese against the Chinese and Korean people occurred five or even six generations back, however there are movements in today’s youth in China and Korea against the Japanese.
Student: But that is a totally, totally different situation. Japan, China and Korea have always had their own land. They share the same religion. It’s a completely different situation.
Me: Yes, they have had their own lands and shared a religion, but what I mean is that the problem of tensions against Japan goes back some generations. Today’s grandparents were born during or after the war and can’t be held accountable for what were in effect decisions made by their parents and grandparents. And yet the present generation of Chinese and Koreans still won’t let the past alone.
Student: But it’s a totally different situation and has nothing to do with the Israelis and the Palestinians who have been fighting for land and have different religions.
Me – No, in that case I agree with you that the two are different. But since you mentioned that the problem goes back some generations and can’t be resolved so easily from one generation to the next, I drew a parallel between that and Japan and its neighbours who also have sour relations because of issues that extend back to generations past.
Student – But it’s a totally, totally different situation. You can’t compare the two at all.
Me – Not even by saying that the problems in both cases go back some generations and can’t be resolved easily? You don’t think that there is at least that similarity?
Student – No, because the situations are completely different and can’t be compared at all. These are two entirely different topics of discussion.
Me – (shrugging) OK.
I was hoping to teach him today about how to disagree with someone nicely by acknowledging their opinion such as by saying, “I can see what you are getting at but to me the two situations are incomparable.” But he was absent today. My co-worker had to teach him once and said that right from the start he felt that here was a person he could not get along with. So, I have the pleasure of teaching the class. I do enjoy it though. Discussions with him keep me on my toes.
