• killingme4u said on Jan 17, 2009....

  hey. been there but not gonna preach. just saying know what's up.ok?
  not gonna even try to be pushy.......but there are alot of cool ppl. @ SC ya stick around long enough n keep venting here.i'm reading already.be cool.

• KathQuiet said on Jan 17, 2009....

  My heart cries for you, for what it's worth, dear child.   I've been on the abyss-edge, too, but not caused by torture like what you describe.  HOW DARE THEY?  What is in their sick heads?  There is no way you attracted any such thing to yourself, who's fucking your mind like that?  There is NEVER an excuse to rape anyone. 
   
  Get away from there, go, go, go to the police. They will help you.  It will not be easy, but anything has got to be better than the hell you're in.  You deserve a life and they can help you get it. 
   
  Big hugs to you, little one.
   

• breakingmysilence said on Jan 17, 2009....

  Hello. I understand. I truely do. I have been there. I know what it is like. My step father did it to me too...he resides with my family while I left at 13...at 33, he is still there. I am not. It is horrible. I never told on anyone for raping or assaulting me. Then, my own father, uncle, and cousin. However, recently I was sexually assaulted by a cop...and I told and he was just arrested. It is a relief to call and tell, even though it was hard and tough to do. I think as KathQuiet has said, go and tell the police. Call NOVA, they are an vicitim's help organization. They are giving me free counseling and helping me do what I need to do legally. It will help you, it helped me. I am healing faster from this last abuse because I did tell. In the past, I never did anything and I had guilt. Sweatheart, I know it hurts so much, as I did attempt to leave this world by suicide, but I am so glad to be here now...you can email me privately if you want to talk...if you want numbers to people who can help you deal with this.
   
  I wish you the best...I was wondering...you used the word Jehovah? Were you or are you a JW?
   
  Hugs and more hugs..... 

• KathQuiet said on Jan 17, 2009....

  Big hugs to breakingmysilence, too.  There is so much out here for you, abused girl, so many resources, people who know and people who may not know but who care on the most human level. 

• lionesss said on Jan 17, 2009....

  sending hugs to both abused-girl,and breakingmysilence, my heart goes out to you both and keep talking about things never keep quiet every1 is great and will listen and give you time and listen,xxxxxxxxxxx

• Fallyn said on Jan 17, 2009....

  i'm here too. keep talking....we'll all keep listening.

• diabolicdame said on Jan 18, 2009....

  Hey abused girl and breakingmysilence.. I'm sending lots of hugs and good thoughts to you both.. I'm here listening too..

• darkerthanlight said on Jan 18, 2009....

  I am so sorry that you are going through this.  It's a trauma that no one should have to endure.  I've been raped too, just not by my father.  You didn't deserve to be raped, nor did you ask for it.  I do hope that there is some way that you can heal from this tragic existence.  I know what it's like to have several suicide attempts.  Each time the period in which I was close to death brought a different concept to an end.  The last one scared me.  What if you died and all doorknobs disappeared.  What if you died and saw spirits surrounding you.  What if death is not just nothingness.  One never knows until they get to the other side.  I know what it is like to feel self hatred.  I have been there.  I hope that you find a way to heal without killing yourself.  I understand what it's like to feel as though there is no other alternative in order to escape personal hell.  Believe me.  I've been there.  I have also been in psych wards.  None of it is fun, in reality, is it?  The attempt, the end result, what led up to the attempt.  All of it is misery and despair.  I hope that there is a better way out for you other than suicide.  I would hate to think that you could permanently go through what I had to go through temporarily during my last attempt.  Remember that anything is possible.

• penny said on Jan 18, 2009....

  Get out of there now! Right now! Leave. We believe in you others will too. Save yourself! to hell with them just get out!

• MissMimi said on Jan 18, 2009....

  I can feel the pain and rage in your words.  Abuse and rape are never ever the victim's fault.  Keep writing, I'm listening and so are many other compassionate ears.

• SlickNick said on Jan 18, 2009....

  Hey I know the pain that you feel. I'm not going to get into details but I've had something pretty terrible happen to me when I was younger and had to live with this person and pretend like I didn't know what happened for fear of losing my life. I hope you can get out of your situation and get the help you deserve. Please don't listen to those who say all those negative things and blame you for what happened. That is just ridiculous. No one asks for this to happen to them. I want to throw a brick in the face of those people and say oh well you asked me to throw this brick in your face. I can't believe the stupid things that come out of people's mouths sometimes. 

• mixednuts said on Jan 18, 2009....

  The person replying to this *might have been raped by his father when he was 6 years old. Suicide has always been on *his mind. *His life style is a form of suicide. This made *him cry and the only time *he cries is in the sunshine , or the rain. If you were to go *he would want to go too.

• mixednuts said on Jan 18, 2009....

  Feel free to message me anytime.Never, ever do what you feel like doing. Let me be your cyber punching bag. I can take the blows.!

• wormhilda said on Jan 18, 2009....

  There is a life after this one. Will you like it more? Read, or google "RAYMOND MOODY" (life after life)

  {{{HUGS!}}}

• ALT said on Jan 18, 2009....

  I know who you are. You don't need to be an ALT. This was tragic, but someone has it worse than you, so be a guiding light!

• BRITTANY_SPEARS said on Jan 18, 2009....

  I felt like killing myself when my kids were stolen, but we need to fight the good fight. Tell your family and the world what happened to you.

• FRITZtheCAT said on Jan 18, 2009....

  Call the cops. Scratch the sucker.

• dragonfly1 said on Jan 18, 2009....

  You did not cause this! Do you blame yourself in some way!? Get some real help.

• overlord said on Jan 18, 2009....

  What is it that you need and want now?

• seer said on Jan 22, 2009....

  Nobody causes this or deserves this.
   
  This is possibly the most heart wrenchingly painful post I've seen in months.
   
  If you keep posting, talking about your sadness, people like you will be moved.
   
  If you need someone just to chat to, PM me, I'm all ears :)

• HONESTYATITSBEST said on Jan 23, 2009....

  PleasE DO NOT ALLOW them to rob you! DO NOT LET THEM!  Do not allow them to rob anyone else either, say something to someone and PLEASE get help!  I did and it gets better I absolutely promise you it does and can get better, it does not seem like that now but it will when you fight back.  SPEAK! Don't hide! You have support anytime you need it and I promise YOU DID NOT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH IT! IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. NOT YOUR FAULT! ITS NOT YOUR FAULT! ITS NOT YOUR FAULT! It never was.

• PAPARAZZI said on Feb 05, 2009....

  Are you feeling any better?

• notaboutus said on Feb 10, 2009....

  Ive found if we're living for others to be happy thats not right...As much as we push on to make sure others lives are not effected, we're not being true...With life comes responsibility and I hope we all have the courage to perceiver when rock bottom strikes...I wish all when judgement day comes you live on for yourself...And when rock bottom hits; you hit back harder...

• blits said on Jul 15, 2009....

  this twice happened to me when i was about 8 years old or so.one was by a guy that used to live with us and the other was my aunt.i was only 8 then and i guess i must have forgotten about it.what ass would say that you attracted it?you've come this far through the shit,if you were supposed to be dead you would have been.call some authorities or get straight and defend yourself if this shit would want to happen again.if when i was raped when i was younger were to happen now (or try to) i'd  get serious  to the point where i'd almost kill the person.i dnt think anyone should be killed by a other person but other person should not charge upon another's body.fuck that.
  its things like this that tear down the experience of living in this world for others but it wont always be that way,this wont be your life story.you'll move on eventually and be the blessing that other people are looking for.i suggest that you talk about it and get it out of you for your own sanity.get out of the house or where ever that influences your mind negatively.get new friends or be a friend to someone who needs one.i did that when i was once suicidal over a couple of things.it might help you too.there are ways to heal,its just gonna take time and effort.
  my heart be with you...
  

• streetfreak said on Sep 17, 2009....

  wow...this is so odd for me to read. i've written things exactly like it...with no punctuation because only without punctuation can someone build up enough momentum while reading to get the feeling of hysteria desperation and pure hatred across. 
  be careful. if you feel like that for long enough, you'll lose the ability to care about anything, and that's even scarier than what you're feeling now.

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