beyondtheveil posted on Jan 10, 2009
| views: 405
To all my dear friends who enjoy a glass of wine...
and especially those who don't -
As Ben Franklin said : "In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom,
in water there is bacteria."
In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that
if we drink one liter of water each day, at the end of that year we would have
absorbed more than 1 kilo of E. Coli - the extremely dangerous bacteria
found in feces.
In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop. (that's over 2 pounds)
However, we do not run that risk when drinking wine or beer (tequila, rum,
whiskey, or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process
of boiling, filtering, and/or fermenting.
Remember : Water = Poop
Wine = Health
Therefore its better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full
of shit.
There is no need to thank me for this, I consider it a public service.
Comments
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woman said on Jan 10, 2009....
Why you old poop! Thanks for making me laugh! Now since I have to drink water, because I am diabetic and take drugs that forbid alcohol, I am going to really feel shitty!!What a way to start my day... -
PAPERBACKWRITER said on Jan 10, 2009....
hahahahaha
You are still talking shit, beyond!?! *giggle*
But man, I love the shit blogs you post... hahahaha
paper ~ almost pissing
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Me-Myself&I said on Jan 10, 2009....
LOL.... oh. i don't know what to say but ....i do not drink water....wait, i do too. i love my coffee ....cool! the hot water should kill some of the shit in it. don't you think!? huh
go wine!....whiskey *smile*
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beyondtheveil said on Jan 10, 2009....
woman- I'll get on google and try to find a replacement for that awful stuff. Wait a minute, memy gave me an idea - boil your water!
paper- Now I've done it - beyondtheshitblogger - but I do so love to talk shit.
memy- Oh, yea...I have to drink my coffee too. Maybe the hot water does help.
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woman said on Jan 10, 2009....
Well beyond, If I boil it the bacteria should be killed but won't the shit still be there? Ok. A water joke from WC Fields. He once said this.."Water, I never touch the stuff, fish fuck in it!" Always makes me laugh! -
PAPERBACKWRITER said on Jan 10, 2009....
awwwwwww i would rather baptize you with the nickname....
beyondtheticklerofthebrain&ticklebone ...or something like that lol
actually, i have really been thinking of a nickname for you... i love nicknames.. i so love ginger´s nickname for you... beybey conveys so much fondness :)))
... hmmm, maybe a poll blog?! whadddya think ;)
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gingersoul said on Jan 10, 2009....
BeyBey.......just one word for you....BRITA......lol...
And you know that you knock at one wide open door with me....i drink wine only. Sometimes a beer (i like Corona and Red Devil) and rarely a soda.
So i am going to live forever!.....;-D
Joanna......i am so tempted to share his nickname with you......but...i can't.....sorry....... its all mine!!!!!...muahhhhhh.....
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PAPERBACKWRITER said on Jan 10, 2009....
hihihi I know Gingery! I hold nicknames to friends and love ones very dear too !!! hahaha
... and nicknames are like champagne they have to undergo thorough fermentation before they are ready to pop... so for the meantime i think the interaction between beyondtheticklerofthefunnybone and me would have to ferment before a superdooper permanent fond nickname can pop!
;)))
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diabolicdame said on Jan 10, 2009....
Yeah and I'm sure its the best piece of research you've ever laid eyes on!! lol.. you really are a potty-mouth btv.. so much poop talk!! hahahahaha.. lol.. I drink lots more than a litre a day of water.. I'm not even going to calculate what that.. err.. means..!! -
beyondtheveil said on Jan 10, 2009....
woman- I like that! - WC Fields, I catch one of his movies sometimes.
paper- ...poll...I don't think so, I shudder to think of some of the names that might crop up. Champagne and nicknames, that's neat. I'm kind of fermented myself.
ginsoul- Hey girl, I've missed you (I know you were busy with, well, things). I can see it in the stars, you will live a very long life making people happy. The beer (and ale) I like is too long to post.
diabo- Being a potty-mouth serves to filter and cleanse my soul. And if you're a dirty old man, its a necessity.
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diabolicdame said on Jan 10, 2009....
Hahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.. lol.. I'm laughing so hard I'm crying!! -
gingersoul said on Jan 10, 2009....
BeyBey....oh, but i have never really left you ......just reading and not commenting..;-P
And ... as i see it.....a beer post is mandatory now....:-)
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Lucytorial said on Jan 10, 2009....
LOL I've known this for a while, we are of the same intelligence I see. -
queenparanoia said on Jan 10, 2009....
hahahahhahahahhaha poop!!!! ;-)
thank god i drink beer!!!
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one_wired_kitty said on Jan 10, 2009....
HAHAHA -
D6fer said on Jan 10, 2009....
That's it.....I am replacing the water bottle with a keg! -
PieterOpie said on Jan 10, 2009....
The irrational statement of a true alcoholic drug pusher. Poop is everywhere because we are such grubby creatures. However we have an immune system which efficiently eliminates the little buggers in our environment and in our water unless the are present in overwhelming numbers.
Since you do not state any facts other than a claim of some sort of "studies" I must dismiss them as being unreliable. Many people consume and come in contact with water all the time, yet we are not all dying of infection. You are just making fun perhaps.... That would be fine except you seem to be promoting alcohol as an alternative to water. That would have dire consequences. Humans must have water to live. If we only used alcohol our bodies would rapidly dehydrate and we would croak.... that is, die. Yes .... die.
Are you trying to kill us? What is wrong with you, you potential murderer? Are you mad? What about the kiddies? They cannot drink your fire water you viper. Oh sure, send them to school drunk and disorderly... my god. Isn't society already in trouble enough without our kiddies falling about in the playgrounds of the schools? They will go mental. I dare not think where it would all end. They'll all become alcoholics and live in the gutter. You want that you monster?
SHAME ON YOU YOU BOOZER.... YOU LUSH.... YOU DRUG PUSHER!!!!!
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silver_phoenix said on Jan 10, 2009....
beyond- thanks doc...guess it's time to go drink a margarita...or a mojito! -
BEWELL said on Jan 11, 2009....
HOLY CRAP BATMAN!! I will have a beer to that! -
Hegemone said on Jan 11, 2009....
Well aren't you just all full of shitty information lately, lol. He he, had to play on the words a little bit. Makes me want to sit here and have a drink too! -
scipio said on Jan 11, 2009....
Accept this post in good humour. Like the T-shirt philosophies. In the midst of all the doom and gloom - it is pleasant to read something else for a change. -
CayenneMan said on Jan 11, 2009....
Wow just to breath the air will probably kill ya . . .
ha ha ha ! Sounds like the words to a futuristic movie, I just had to throw it in.
Have a great day beyondtheveil. I only drink distilled water. I make up for the lost minerals with supplements. I never have dinner without wine, I guess I must be doing something right ? I haven't been sick in over fifteen years.
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beyondtheveil said on Jan 11, 2009....
ginsoul- I'm all for a beer post, but I'd rather you do it. I'm in enough trouble here already.
lucy- I think you are right, and I'm in good company.
d6- Now there's an idea. I love that tap beer.
opie- My, but you can go off on a tangent - but you're fun to read.
phoxy- Its always margarita time!
bewell- I have mine every afternoon. Grilling outside causes me to have more.
hege- I noticed that too.
scipio- No kidding, you got to take a break now and then.
cayenne- Its good to have you back.
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PieterOpie said on Jan 11, 2009....
Nobody takes me seriously.......... WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
hic...
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fragglesrock said on Jan 12, 2009....
well i for one am soooo glad that pieter set us straight...guess i'll have to take the flasks outta the kid's lunch boxes :) -
beyondtheveil said on Jan 12, 2009....
fraggles- Hahahahahahaha -
PieterOpie said on Jan 12, 2009....
But... but... how are the kiddies gonna wash down their ecstasy pills???
My god!!!! They could choke on one ad that's just too risky. LEAVE THE FLASK!!!
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PieterOpie said on Jan 12, 2009....
EDIT: FIND "ad" - REPLACE WITH: "and" - END EDIT:
(this is a dumb way to edit......)
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beyondtheveil said on Jan 12, 2009....
I can't edit my comments either. I also can't edit my posts with backspace. -
PieterOpie said on Jan 12, 2009....
Oh I know....... It's simply preposterous!!! Monstrous!!! Downright evil......
Let's all kill ourselves, then they'll soon take notice.
(do you think???)
OK... I will hold my breath until they make it editable or I pass out with braiaiaiaian damagegegege..... wwweh..heheheeewwww.....dehhhh.... drool....
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babafemi said on Feb 04, 2009....
i am despirately in need of $1 from somebody, who cares. -
mayor_maynot said on Feb 04, 2009....
ok. In reality don't drink the water because the local water purification systems do not remove the psychotrophics and the hormones from the waste water system. As a result these components are being returned to the ground water. Ever seriously wonder why our current youth are so abnormal. It could be because the water still has psyche drugs in it. Hormones in it. Women take birth control pills to control birth. Their bodies don't absorb all of the medication. The left overs are deposited into the wastewater. The wastewater treatment plants do not filter or remove those Components from the wastewater before returning the wastewater back to the ground water. Resulting in the introduction of these components into the ground water. Now that is the real reason why you should distill your drinking water. Not because it's full of feces but because it's full of DOPE. U DOPE.
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