Weather geeks always have to give new names to every kind of weather event. Thunderstorm watches, thunderstorm warnings, the dreaded tornado watches and warnings, and wind advisories and high wind warnings... You name it they have a nice name for it. In the summer there should be sweat advisories and copious sweat warnings for when it's really hot. We ladies of a certain age live in a near constant state of high sweat warnings.
Today I'm writing out Christmas cards, and watching it snow. (Actually I'm goofing off here because doing Christmas cards is irritating me to no end today. I like to write with my Viagra pen, and I can't find it.) We're under a winter weather advisory, not to be confused with a winter storm watch or a winter storm warning. Why do they have to confuse me? Why can't they just say, it's going to snow today? The forecast is for an inch or less. The top story on the news today has been, how all the salt trucks are going to be out salting the roads (I just fixed a typo -- I typed salting the toads by mistake... heehee...) to save us all from the white death. For less than an inch of snow.
If they do this for weather, then just imagine how many watches and warnings we should be aware of for all areas of life. I would like a windbag alert issued for when I have to see my brother-in-law. All phone calls to customer service departments should come with Idiot Warnings. Some customer service departments might even rate an Idiot Warning with an Ass-Pain Factor of about a billion. Another good idea might be a droopy flab warning for when I might accidentally see myself naked in a mirror.
Okay, well, I'll stop now. This blog has been issued a high foolishness alert. Beware.
