i'm in this very chill mood right now. i keep wanting to write about things im thinking the past few days but i keep thinking the act will bring down my high. im such a loner lately. i just sit around smoking pot or going to work. every time i go to a party or chill with anyone, i just come home kinda early. most of my time is spent sitting in my room thinking.

i keep trying to trick myself into positive thinking too lol. actually, the cool thing was that i started painting last night. i was sitting around and just grabbed my paint shit and painted over my "motivational" flyers. one of em says "life is good, bro!" on it. idk, i was high. anyway, i woke up this morning and saw it and was like "yeah... its not bad" lol. idk. i entertain myself.

i've been entertaining myself a lot. lol. when i smoke, i analyze weird shit, or do some music shit or art shit. i keep getting lost on these ridiculous trains of thought.

idk. i just walked 3 miles home from a party.

omg it was funny as hell. i quit drinking, so instead of having a drink when everyone was playing a drinking game, i hit my bowl. it was hilarious, because i was getting so much more fucked up than anyone else. especially when we did like a waterfall thing, i had to hit it the whole time. lol yeah life aint that bad.

well shit, i dont really mind this loner shit. i'm just this weird stoner that hangs out with her dealers and sometimes friends but mostly just sits around smoking pot or working.

idk im too tired. fuck this.

<3 zane