Ever since elementary I had a huge crush with my bestfriend Lupin. I cherish every moment we shared and spend. Even if just academics or fun it's like a dream come true. Sometime I get jealous when he's with our fellow classmate/friends especially girls. But I always kept a smile that hide my envy and sadness.
It high school that I got the guts to tell him I have feelings for him. It was the day of our fieldtrip in a monastery that I talked to him. As I talked to him, he was shocked and tell me that he has already a girlfriend. I also felt shock that he doesn't even mention that he had already someone to me as his bestfriend.
And then I knew (kinda hurt) it was my bestfriend Maria they started their relationship when we were 1st year HS. The person that I share my secrets about my feelings to Lupin.
I was totally lost and hurt that I went away. During the fieldtrip, I try to
avoid them even though they want to explain.The day was the worst moment that I want to erase. Two bestfriend didn't even telling me...they made me dumb..and stupid.
I hate them...
monozuki posted on Jun 05, 2006
| views: 77
Comments
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Iocus said on Jun 05, 2006....
monozuki, it's wrong not to tell your frined what is really going on, but I think they really didn't want to hurt your heart from the start. Perhaps because the one that made them both love eachother is their love of friendship with you. At first their distant friends, discussing about this one best friend they share. Not long after that, they fall in love with each other. Besides, if they tell you when you are first crush with him, is gonna hurt a lot, because that means she doesn't lvoe him and initiating a war with you to get him. If she didn't tell you, that's because she is trying to sort out her feelings first,to see whether you still had any chance that she could back out. Sulking or denying this ain't gonna make it any better. It's painful to knwo this late, but it's more painful to know this when it's too late. -
monozuki said on Jun 07, 2006....
Your right.. beside I already forgive them. And realized to be happy for them thinking I'm the "cupid" that made them together. Kinda slightly hurt although cause I still have little feelings for him but it's for the best so be it =) -
Iocus said on Jun 09, 2006....
There you go, gal! And sides, I'm willing to be friends with yah, and I don't have or interested wiht any guy that somehow like you ( I assume my opuberty didn't hit in whole package, cuz somehow I'm not interested with guys or girls, for that matter. am I asexual? *Shivers*) Anyway, there's still lot of time. Better you were crushed because ' my girlfriend had him' than 'what's wrong with me that he wouldn't like me'. THAT would bring worser consequences. IMAGINE: I had to save two girl in a year( last year) who tried suicide because they weren't loved by their crushes. I, soemone who don't even had a notion about love, had to convince two girl, madly in love, not to kill themselves. The funny thing is, I did managed to do that, though. 0~0 -
monozuki said on Jun 10, 2006....
That was kind of you. It so Sad lots of the people in the world get crazy of LOve that they rather die than to be alone. Right now I just need friends and I sometimes I'm a chaperon of my friends of their date (at least my treats is free). Right now also I rather felt not to have a lover cause I want to be carefree and do anything that make me happy/. Thanks !!=)
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