I think I need some “backstory” here. I think it is important to explain who my Mom is, so that you have a complete picture. My Mom is not a bad person, she just doesn’t always have the best judgment. When I was growing up, there were things she would tell me that no kid should be told. Things that were way too adult. My Dad did his best to run interference and keep her in check, but of course, he had to work too, so there were often times when she would tell me “stuff” about life and money and our lack of money that made me fret and worry.

Also, it never helped to hear “we’re only staying together because of you.” Those words ring in my head to this day.

So, why did I send my precious son to spend time with her this past summer? Because I felt he needed to know her. I thought we had raised him to have strong values and strong beliefs and that when she started to go off into left field with her conversations with him, he would be strong enough to understand and deflect. I thought he would learn about her, as a person, take away the good things, and there are many, many good things about my Mom, believe me, and leave the crazy things there, as he would recognize them for what they were.

It’s kind of funny, because I was partially right, and partially wrong. I see that now. Mom told him all sorts of things about how awful some races are and useless, and other things that are too shameful to repeat. She *knows* that we believe that everyone is equal. I don’t care if your skin is purple with orange polka dots, we are still equal. My Mom doesn’t believe that. Heck, she’s threatening to leave the country if Obama is elected, and she has counseled me and my son that if Obama is elected, we will be all but forced into slavery. Gosh, she really does sound kind of whacked as I type this. I never really considered that till now. Sigh. Hindsight is always 20/20, I think.

Anyhow, my Mom is retired. She made lots and lots of money, as a mortgage broker, and she spent lots and lots of money, and did not save for her retirement, so she is subsisting on SSI, and barely making ends meet, but still wants to keep her dignity and make it appear as if she is well off.

She lives out in the country, on a ranch, with an extremely wealthy older man who she's been with for about 10 years. He won't marry her, as he doesn't believe in it and doesn't want her having control over his assets. He is in his mid 80's. He is not a nice man, he can be very mean, and very frightening. He has always liked my son and always treated him well, but he has a dark side that my son knows to avoid at all costs. They live on one hundred acres or so in a very nice home, with several day workers who run things because the man just can't do it now that he is older. The names of the workers change from time to time, as they catch one stealing or another drinking, but there are always workers, who, I guess, in reality are kind of transcient since they never really last more than five or six months.

So that’s my backstory—some of the information that I think contributes to what happened and could be the cause, if I only knew for sure.  I guess that’s enough for today’s post. My next post will drag you back to the story.