I am becoming a new person completely. Admitting my failures in life I have decided to move on, and carve a new path for myself. But, first I need to take a refresher course in living. I used to be all about self reliance; strong woman, etc. Then I got pregnant before I was ready and moved in with the penis that impregnated me. I absolutely adore my daughter in: the sun shines out of her eyes and her breath is my universe expanding and contracting.

It's her father that is the real issue in this case, the man tells me I am unworthy, no one else would love me, guilt tripped me out of going to college,alienated me from my friends and family, told me I was not "allowed" to work, and has monitored my entire life for the past two years down to my drab wardrobe. I am ready to break free of his assumed ownership of and objectification me and move into a new life for myself and my daughter. I'm not blaming him because I have allowed this behavior to be acceptable.

So, I'm starting small. Baby steps.One foot in front of the other! Discussing things with him rationally and in a low tone voice, allowing him to get used to me asserting myself and warming him up for what is to come; applying for jobs that I want and some that I don't want,  getting all of my transcripts and financial aid documents together, taking stock in my appearance again, exercising, eating healthy, reminding myself that I am young, I am attractive, I am intelligent, I am capable, and I do not need him or anyone else to allow me the luxury of self esteem and success.

Also, I told my family what has been going on. Talking about it made a major difference in how I feel about the situation and made me realize that I have people who love me, support me and want to see me truly and genuinely happy.