Teaching in a South Auckland city was a learning experience for me, having come from a WASP rural community and finding a multi-cultural school population. One of the common elements between pupils from the Pacific islands and Asia was the way women were held to be inferior.

One pupil in particular was a real behaviour problem in my class or Year 7 pupils, and I always knew it was because I was "only" a woman. The lad had said to me and other pupils how he wished he had a real teacher like Mr X or Mr Y! He was never rude, aggressive or violent, just cheeky and delaying compliance to the limit of patience.

I thought I'd tell you how things changed. The pupils went to another teacher for a special interest lesson once a week, and this lad - I'll call him Sua but it is nowhere near his real name - had chosen geology. As his science project he had made a model volcano (sound familiar to other teachers? chuckle).

Came the day when his project had to be brought to school, and he had arranged for his dad to bring it in. He waited in the classroom with me until he saw his dad pull up outside, and Sua shot out to escort his dad in. I went to the outer door to open it for dad.

As I held the door handle and pushed the door open, to hold it open I chose to lean out. Now this lowered my head. And if you didn't already know you may need to - in many island cultures you show respect for someone above you in the social hierarchy by keeping your head lower than theirs.

Sua's dad was struggling with bent knees to carry the heavy model (a lump of volcano shaped concrete!), and to show respect for me, bless him, he had to really crouch down low to get past me in the door!

I will always remember the expression on Sua's face when he realised that his dad was being respectful to this teacher, a woman! A light-bulb went on, I tell you

Sua Never again was cheeky or slow to comply, and his change in behaviour had a positive influence on many of the other boys of his culture!

When he comes to mind, I wonder how he managed in later schooling and his career. I hope he continued to do well.