im not sure if im yet fitting in here . most importantly I do not know if this is the right job for me, cuz im definitely more sad and deprived that I used to be . just very tired, endless efforts taken to complete a task and that doesnt even amount up to anything. It's sad situation ,really. You may work your ass off, but the efforts go unnoticed. Even if they are , sometimes it all just washes away . Looks as if nothing is worth it.
It was so weird, that I who never cry for anything , just stayed inside the loo yesterday to actually let out few tears , because I felt so lonely , worthless , insecure , hurt and inadequate. those are the fears that always haunted me never wanting to feel that way , but i do. I do feel shitty and many times it comes to my head thinking what should I do! I feel incapable , sometimes they make me feel so. So helpless ,like no one cares. It's as if my work is only for personal reasons . Hell we all work for this firm , why can't they cooperate?? 


