FOR THOSE WHO ENJOY ENGLISH LANGUAGE (or Severe Distortions, thereof):

a. A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

 

b. Dijon vu - the same mustard as before

 

c. Practice safe eating - always use condiments.

 

d. Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

 

e. Those who jump off a bridge in Paris must be in Seine

 

f. A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.

 

g. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

 

h. Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

 

i. Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.

 

j. Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.

 

k. When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

 

l. A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.

 

m. Definition of a will: A dead give away.

 

 n. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

 

o. She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.

 

p. A ch icken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

 

q. If you don't pay your exorcist, you'll be repossessed.

 

r. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

 

s. When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.

 

t. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

 

u. Local Area Network in Australia : the LAN down under.

 

v. Every calendar's days are numbered.

 

w. A lot of money is tainted - It taint yours and it taint mine.

 

x. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

 

y. A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.

 

z. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

 

AND:

 

aa. Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.



ab. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
 

ac. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

 

ad. Acupuncture is a jab